Prelude
by belladonnacullen
Summary: Much more happens than Bella realizes in those four weeks between Eclipse and BD. Edward figures out how to make Bella's honeymoon wish come true. Emmett, Jasper & Rose secretly travel abroad to save Bella's life. B/E/Emm/POV. Rated M for a reason.
1. Restraint

**I don't own Twilight or any of its characters, I just bend them to my will.**

**A/N: Confessions time: This is my first fan fic. When I started writing I didn't even know what fan fiction was. Now it's made my life a much happier place. Please be patient while I lay the groundwork for the story, and get a few SM necessities out of the way. And if you stick with it there is lots of action and lemony sweetness ahead. Really, I promise!**

**So thanks for clicking on my story. Give it a whirl and let me know if you like it. I've become a review-a-holic. **

**Much love, Marie**

* * *

Consume this hesitation of not knowing.  
Never doubt,  
Only walk forward.  
Love everything,  
For that is why you are here.  
Fortunate birth is who you are-  
Everything is perfect in your world.

Fortunate Birth  
Sakyong Mipham Rinpoche

"These are my enticements, and they are sufficient to conquer all fear of danger or death and to induce me to commence this laborious voyage with the joy a child feels"

Frankenstein  
Mary Shelley

* * *

Things are settled. I'm getting married.

Everything had gone much better with Charlie and Renee than I expected. Of course, Charlie had been sulking ever since my phone call to Renee announcing my engagement. He had obviously been certain she would put an end to the wedding plans. But instead, Renee asked me to pass the phone to Charlie and I could hear her excited monologue as Charlie reluctantly held the phone to his ear. He was even more reluctant as he passed along the phone number to the Cullen residence. For two solid days now Charlie managed to find enough games on T.V. to keep him completely and utterly occupied well into the early morning hours.

The scene at the Cullens' residence yesterday when Edward and I announced our news was much different. Of course, it was no surprise to Alice, but I would bet that the rest of the family had more than an inkling that something of this nature was in the works.

I remember quite clearly the flutter of butterflies in my stomach and the tight smile on my face as I walked through the large front door of the Cullen mansion, Edward's hand firmly holding mine. Without raising his voice in the least, he said simply, "Carlisle, Esme, Emmett, Rose, Jasper, Alice; Bella and I have some news."

His family was there in an instant, each more glorious and beautiful than the next. They stopped before us on the landing, standing still as statues. They rarely bothered to play human in my presence anymore. Their inquisitive expressions seemed very carefully arranged on their faces, and I could swear I saw the quiver of a smile on Esme's lips.

"I wanted you all to know that Bella has done me the honor of agreeing to be my wife." I looked up at Edward and he was clearly euphoric; beams of light escaped from his golden eyes as he turned from his family to look down at me. His smile took my breath away, and he pulled me toward him and kissed me warmly on the lips.

Still holding me he turned back to his family and said, "The ceremony will be on August 13th, with all of your permission we would like it to be here." Again, Edward's smile was triumphant and proud. I finally remembered to breath again, and my first breath came as a sigh.

Esme was at my side instantly, hugging me as best she could, while Edward's arms were still around me. "I'd hoped for so long that Edward would find you. Thank you for accepting us as family, my daughter."

Carlisle, using a more human gate than Esme, was next to reach Edward and I. He stretched his hand out towards Edward's, smiling, and then bent to give me a cold kiss on the cheek. "Bella, please think of this as your home now too," Carlisle asserted.

My home indeed! I took a quick look at the sweeping cathedral ceilings, the twenty-foot glass walls looking out over the forest, the furniture unlike anything I had seen at such close range until now. But somehow, even though it was unlike any home I had ever been in before, and it's inhabitants were unlike any other family I had known before, this did feel unmistakably like mine.

Alice and Emmett were crowding around us too. Alice was pulling my left hand toward Emmett, showing off my new ring. "Alice, you didn't tell them already, did you?" I whispered. But then I realized everyone in the room could have easily heard me, whisper or not.

"Believe me, I didn't have to say a thing. You and Edward are like open books these days."

Before I could reach out to hug Alice, Emmett caught me up in a big bear hug, tousled my hair and called me little sister like he meant it. Then casting a glance toward Rosalie, he bounded back up onto the landing and took her hand, still smiling broadly in my direction.

Only Rosalie and Jasper kept their distance. Jasper was always careful to keep space between us, still not trusting his himself to adhere to his new vegetarian diet. His smile was genuine enough though, and I really appreciated his effort on my part. Rosalie's smile on the other hand seemed strained. I recalled that she had planned a lavish wedding when she was my age, one that had gone terribly wrong. While I never would have dreamed it possible, it certainly seemed that the most beautiful woman I had ever met was jealous of me. But even Rose couldn't dampen the feeling growing in the pit of my stomach. This was my family now, where I belonged, with Edward by my side.

But that was yesterday. Now it was one am and I was at home, waiting patiently for Charlie to retire for the night. I had just taken a quick trip across the hall to see if Charlie was finally asleep. Of course, Edward had already known, and he was in my room waiting to surprise me on my return.

Would I ever get used to seeing Edward Cullen splayed across my bed? I felt a warm shiver travel from my ears to my toes as I entered my bedroom and took in his sculptured body. His chiseled form was all too evident underneath his form-fitting dark gray T-shirt. I purposefully moved my gaze to meet his eyes, golden amber and full of love.

"Bella," he said and was suddenly by my side. With one swift move I was in his arms, my head cradled against his chest. Then, just as quickly, I was lying in my bed, Edward's head propped up in his hands, his face just inches from mine.

My breath grew haggard as it always did when Edward and I were this close. It was this unmistakable physiologic response to his mere presence, and the love I could now recognize in his eyes, that made me certain I had made the right choice. I would never love anyone else the way I loved the vampire Edward Cullen. And I knew he felt the same about me. So what if everyone I knew in Forks would suspect teen pregnancy? (If they only knew how very far they were from the chaste truth.) Edward and I were made for each other, and I was about to have him forever.

Edward brought my left hand to his face, pressing my palm against his icy cheek, and then brushed my fingertips one by one against his hard lips. Finally he kissed my engagement ring and let his gaze linger there before lifting his eyes to mine. Edward would never cease to dazzle me, now more than ever. Ever since I agreed to be his wife there was a new joy added to the smoldering of his eyes. It took my breath away.

"What have I done to deserve you?" Edward whispered. "In just four short weeks I can call you Mrs. Cullen. Mrs. Bella Cullen." And he pressed his lips lightly to mine.

"Maybe I won't change my name," I offered with a gleam in my eye. "Or maybe you should change yours, Edward Swan," I joked. "We could always hyphenate, Edward and Bella Swan-Cullen." I managed to laugh a little. But one look at Edward and I could see him struggle to mask disappointment in his eyes. You could take the vampire out of 1918, but you couldn't take the 1918 out of the vampire. "I'm teasing," I reassured him. "Of course I will be honored to be a part of your family, and to call myself Bella Cullen."

That was all it took to bring his cold lips hard against mine, his hands twisting themselves behind my head, through my hair, and his body pressing against me carefully. If I had known marriage was all it would take, maybe I would have said yes sooner. His kisses were long and hard, and my heart raced as if it would break free from my chest.

My hands instinctively searched out the bottom edge of his T-shirt just above the waistband of his khakis. Lifting it ever so slightly, I ran my hands along the smooth contours of his abdomen, and then along his icy back, pulling him closer.

But just as quickly as it started, Edward pulled away. An instant was all it took for him to compose himself. "Bella, our agreement stands. Not until you are my wife. And even then, I can only promise that we will try. I could never live with myself if, if –"

I quickly put my fingers to his lips. "Shh, Edward. I trust you with my life and with my eventual immortality. Think of everything we've been through. We can defy the odds with our physical love as well. It will work. I know we can do this too." It was true. I felt this deeply.

"Ah Bella, I wish I had the same confidence in my restraint as you do."

"Are you kidding? If it weren't for your restraint I would have at least had you out of your shirt by now. You must be the most restrained seventeen-year-old on the planet." Of course Edward had been seventeen for the past eighty-eight years or so, but that just made his abstinence all the more remarkable.

"My dear, if I could have restrained myself at all, I would have left the day I saw you and never turned back. Are you sure Bella? Are you sure about all that you are giving up to be with me?"

"You know the only thing I want is to be with you forever," I assured him. "Well, maybe one more thing. But I'll wait until we are married." I paused. "But I was thinking . . ."

His eyebrows arched as he asked, "Yes Bella?" I could sense some hesitation in his voice.

"Well, Renee, Alice and Esme are already making plans for the _big day_. They have to do this to make sure the wedding goes without a hitch, to make it perfect. If they just blindly waited for the day of the wedding without doing any of the work, it wouldn't happen at all. And I wouldn't keep my end of the bargain."

"Um," I continued, "so I think there is work we need to do to make sure you keep up your side of the agreement."

"Bella, what are you asking?"

Edward's eyes were probing. He always seemed a bit slow when it came to sex. Was it years spent without this desire that did this? Or maybe his thirst was the most important thing to him; sex was just second on the list. He certainly didn't have hormones coursing through his veins like I did. Maybe he didn't want me like I wanted him. It was hard not to feel this, even as I was certain of his love for me.

"We've never more than kissed, Edward. Of course it's the most amazing thing I've ever felt, but won't it be more overwhelming for you if we face everything in just one night?"

"But that's what makes it special. That's the way I was raised. That's -"

"But you weren't raised to be a vampire who was marrying a human girl. It changes some things, as you know," I interrupted.

Edward didn't like this. Disapproval was evident in the lines of his face. He was determined to preserve my virtue, and his too.

I quickly continued before he could collect all of his arguments against my line of thinking. "I'm just saying that maybe we should talk this out. Make lines that we won't cross until the wedding night. I don't want either of us to do anything we would regret. But I think it's important that we work on your restraint just like we work on the wedding. It's the best way I know of ensuring that your side of the bargain will be kept."

"If you only knew what your words were doing to me," Edward pleaded.

"That's the problem, I don't exactly. I want you to be able to show me." I purposefully put my lips to his ear. "Badly," I murmured. And I began lightly sweeping my tongue along the edge of his ear lobe. He stayed still like only a vampire could as my lips made their way along his jaw line, slowly down his neck, to the impenetrable neckline of his cotton T.

He lightly cupped his hands around my face and brought it up to meet his eyes. He kissed me once and pulled away. "I want you to know Bella that I've listened to everything, and I understand what you're saying. I need time to consider your proposal. What if just tomorrow we find out that this won't work at all?"

"For one, I don't believe that. And secondly, I would marry you anyway," I assured.

"There would be limits."

"I know."

"Ah Bella, if I could die, you would be the death of me."

I'd heard that one before. "All the better that you're immortal then," I giggled lightly.

"You've given me a lot to consider as usual, my dear. But now it's almost dawn. You should sleep. We can continue this conversation later."

Only then did I realize that the hours had quickly passed, and I was actually very tired. I was surprised that I had gotten this far with Edward, without even planning to in advance. There might actually be something to look forward to over these next four weeks besides fittings, flower arrangements and seating plans. I was more pleased than ever as I closed my eyes and rested my head against Edward's chest. I think I heard him sigh as I drifted off to sleep.


	2. Happy Place

I woke up warm, my thoughts lingering on my dreams from the night before. A smile touched my lips as I realized that those dreams were a bit more likely to become reality after my discussion with Edward last night. I was so warm that I kicked the sheets off. Suddenly I struggled to open my eyes. I was warm. Where was Edward?

Focusing on the empty room around me, my eyes fell on a small creamy-white piece of stationary, a small square box, and a legal-sized envelope lying next to me on the bed. He was gone. My distress subsided just slightly when I noticed Edward's elegant calligraphy on the paper.

_Bella, _

_Please excuse my quick departure. Alice's wedding plans left my brothers and I feeling suddenly thirsty. I set out early so that I can make it back to you by tonight. I can't bear to spend a single night without you by my side. If you need me, I am only a phone call away._

_Until then, I've left the Dartmouth catalogue. Maybe later we can discuss our fall schedule . . .among other things._

_Edward_

I tried to fight the disappointment that was rapidly becoming my most prominent emotion. "He'll be back tonight," I tried to console myself, but tonight seemed much too far away. It was unsettling that Alice's plans would have sent him running for the hills, this wedding was so much more a tribute to him than to me. In an attempt to divert my attention from my rapidly plummeting mood, I opened the box Edward left for me. Inside was a small, silver state of the art cell phone. I flipped it open and noticed that Edward's cell number had already been pre-programmed in. Inside the envelope I found the fall schedule of classes for Dartmouth College.

I sighed. Edward still hoped that we might make it to Dartmouth in the fall. He was more hesitant about my becoming a vampire than anyone in his family, Rosalie included. He didn't want me to lose out on all those human experiences that held no interest for me at all. And I know he worried that I might be forfeiting my soul for him, blaming himself for its potential loss. While I would gladly give my soul twice over to spend eternity with him, I wasn't convinced that any of the Cullens were soul-less.

I didn't think that becoming a vampire was a guarantee that you must become a monster. There was always a choice. The Cullens had chosen a vegetarian lifestyle. They chose to save my life over and over. I had never met a more intentionally self-sacrificing family. More than that, they were each good, through and through. Alice was already like a sister to me.

As if on cue, I heard three quick taps on the door below.

"Bella, open the door, or I'm coming in through the window," Alice called up to my room in her cheery singsong voice.

I tried to put aside my growing despair at Edward's absence as I ran down the stairs. I opened the door to find Alice there with a large white garment bag slung over her shoulder, a stack of papers in one hand, and a thick binder in the other. Oh no, wedding plans.

"My goodness Bella! Did you get any sleep last night? I'm going to have to ban Edward from your house if this is what you're going to look like for the wedding! Now let's get a move on, we only have four weeks to get you ready. I have so much to do," Alice chirped as she slipped by me into the hallway.

Panic washed over my face. This wedding was happening for so many reasons, but the spectacle Alice was planning was not one of them. My original deal with Edward was for a Vegas wedding. But I knew that would break Alice's heart. And then there was Charlie and Renee to think about, and Edward. While Edward would get married in a drive-thru if it were what I asked for, I knew that he had a different vision in his heart. But all of this reasoning would not make it easier for me to keep from falling on my face as I tried to walk in three-inch heels and a floor length gown. I grasped the door for support.

"Calm down Bella, and please stop being so dramatic!" As a vampire Alice could sense my fear and hear the edgy beating of my heart. "Our agreement still stands. I'm here only for pre-approved activities. First we have to finalize the guest list, then there's the initial fitting for your dress. I will only open this binder filled with floral choices, menu options and music selections if you have a sudden change of heart."

Just glancing at the binder caused my knees to weaken and I tightened my grip on the door. "That's unlikely," I managed.

"Bella, sit down." Alice, exasperated, rolled her eyes, took my hand and led me to a kitchen chair.

"If this isn't what you want, well, I _could_ scale it back," Alice pouted as she deposited me carefully into a seat. "I don't want to make you miserable." Alice effortlessly perched herself on the seat back of another chair, her feet on the table, and pushed the two front legs of the chair off the ground, balancing effortlessly.

"Um-" Her proposal to scale back my impending nuptials was tempting, but impossible to agree to. "Alice, this wedding is about more than me. It's something I want to give to you, Charlie, Renee, Carlisle, Esme -"

"And don't forget Edward!" Alice laughed. She was clearly glad I turned down her offer.

"Well of course, he's the only person in existence that could get me to agree to this. But it won't be really worth it until it's all over."

"I think I know how to get you through this Bella. Ever since you've agreed to this wedding I've seen a picture. It's more certain with each day. Today it's about ninety-seven percent certain." Alice paused for dramatic effect. I think sometimes she relished her fortune-teller role. "I can see you and Edward. The wedding is in the past, the reception is almost over, and Edward is holding you in his arms. And well, I'm having trouble getting your attention because you two never want to let each other go. It's going to be very difficult getting you to the plane on time."

My breathing and heart rate slowed as she recounted the future for me. Yes, when this was over it would just be Edward and I together forever. I could feel moisture gather in my eyes and the hint of a smile at the corners of my mouth.

"Yep, that did it! You look a million times better, but don't cry!" I couldn't stop a tear from escaping. "Just concentrate on that picture every time you get nervous."

"Like a happy place," I murmured. "Have you told Edward about that vision?" I asked

"No, and maybe I shouldn't have told you either. I don't want to ruin it. Don't tell him, OK?"

"Sure Alice. He's not here to tell anyway."

"Yes, hunting huh?" Alice scrunched her nose like she often did when something unpleasant crossed her mind.

I remembered his golden eyes from the night before. "Yes. But it doesn't make sense. His eyes were, well, he didn't look hungry last night," I faltered. Sometimes it was still difficult to talk openly about the Cullens' diet, even if it was vegetarian. "I'm surprised that he doesn't want to help us with the wedding. Maybe I did something wrong. He never leaves before I wake up."

"Bella, believe me. You didn't do anything wrong. Edward is as madly in love with you as ever. Since he decided to leave this morning there have been many other moments in your future that I've been trying very hard to block out. Let's just say I think I need to add shopping for your lingerie to my to do list."

Impossible dreams and half-formed thoughts swam to the forefront of my brain and blood quickly warmed my cheeks. I ducked my head. But you can't hide blushing from a vampire.

"Oh my, Bella. Oh, I'm sorry. I embarrassed you, but with those cheeks and that sparkle in your eyes, you look stunning. Whatever you were just thinking, _that_ is definitely your happy place. That is a look I can work with," Alice smiled.

I managed to blush a deeper shade of red.

"Well, about the guest list . . ." Alice graciously changed the topic and started listing a litany of names that I only half concentrated on, still pleasantly dwelling in my happy place. Maybe this wedding planning wouldn't be so bad after all. "Then, of course we have to invite Tanya's clan from Denali."

I looked up, a bit surprised. Of course Tanya and her family would be invited; the Cullens considered them cousins. But Tanya's sister was upset enough about Laurent's death to keep their branch of the family in Denali, when we needed their help desperately in Forks. In fact, Irina blamed me for Laurent's death. And of course, there was Tanya, the strawberry blonde vampire that wanted Edward for her mate.

Alice assessed the apprehension that was clearly evident in my eyes. "Bella, they're family," she chided gently. "All families have their issues. You can be sure they will be on their best behavior. I've seen it," Alice said as she winked and tapped her temple. "Now, who should we invite from school?"

I zoned out again, but this time lost in the horror of having to confront a beautiful strawberry blond goddess on my wedding day.

"About inviting the wolves," Alice said like it was a question. That stopped my thoughts in their tracks. I was pulled back into reality. My breath caught in my throat and I felt my palms begin to sweat. I was still raw from saying goodbye to Jacob and breaking his heart in the process. It brought on a wave of sadness and guilt that I tried desperately to hide.

"Well, Edward wants to invite Seth," I stated, trying to catch my breath. "He's right, we should. Without him I wouldn't be alive for this wedding." I know Seth was not the wolf that Alice was asking about. "My dad will want Sue Clearwater there, so do you think we should invite Leah too? It would be rude to leave her out. Don't you think?" I was babbling now. Alice looked a tad impatient. "Do you think she would come?"

"She's not coming Bella," Alice said with a roll of her eyes. It reminded me of Edward. You might think the Cullens were actually related judging by some of their similar facial expressions. Well, maybe living together for a few decades here or there would do that to you. Now even my thoughts were babbling.

"Bella! Yes or no about Jake?" Alice tried taking a more direct approach, bringing my mind back to the question it was trying to escape.

I wanted Jake there more than just about anyone. He was my best friend in so many ways. It was going to hurt deeply to keep him away. "Alice, I might as well just pull out his heart on that alter. After everything I've done to Jake, I cannot make him endure watching me marry someone else. I know it would kill me to watch Edward marry someone else, like Tanya."

"OK, so, no to Jacob Black." Alice was a little too dramatic as she crossed a big line through the page in front of her. "And really Bells, get over Tanya. That's just silly."

Alice popped up out of her seat and danced across the room. Spinning with a flourish at the foot of the stairs she announced, "Next up, wedding dress!"

Up in my room, she carefully pulled the gown over my head. It was beautifully made, impossibly delicate, and I was sure it wouldn't last an hour intact on my frame. But when I would get noticeably anxious Alice would always whisper, "Happy place!" and well, there were worse ways to spend an hour. Before I knew it the dress was off and Alice was getting set to go.

We were walking down the stairs, Alice saying, "If you have a change of heart at all Bella just say the word. I will make sure this is the most fabulous wedding in Forks history, but it's your day. If you . . ." Alice stopped cold.

"Alice? Alice? Alice!" Alice was suddenly as still as a statue, mid-step on the stairwell. "Alice! What is it? Is it something bad about Edward, about the wedding?"

Alice shook her head. "Oh no, Bella. Just something I have to remind Jasper and Emmett to get done before the wedding. One of those details you asked not to be bothered with. Don't worry, we've got it."

Alice was moving again, a blur of color as she quickly collected her belongings and opened the front door. But then she stopped and turned to me. "Hey Bella, what do you think about inviting Aro?"

"To the wedding!"

"I just think that maybe it will show that we don't have anything to hide. Things are going according to plan, on track and all. Don't worry; he won't come. Its just good form."

"Well, if you think it's the right thing to do. You know more about vampire manners than me." But I was taken off guard and more than a little apprehensive about the latest addition to the guest list.

"Good. It's a plan then. See you later Bella." And with that she was out the door, in her car and out of sight in seconds.


	3. Considerations

My mind wasn't on hunting. Five deer, an elk and a mountain lion were dispatched quickly. I had no desire to stalk and pretend to struggle with the kill as we often did on our hunting trips. It was not lust for the kill that had driven me to overdo my feeding. From an outcropping of rock I watched Jasper speed off toward the western slopes of the Olympic Mountains following a new scent, and I saw Emmett tussle with a mid-sized grizzly in a clearing to the south. Grizzly was Emmett's favorite, in a never-ending quest to show-up the bear that had brought an end to his human life. He could have easily done away with this young bear, but he savored the kill and the obvious frustration that it brought to his animal victim.

My vampire senses were hyper-aware of my setting, but my mind was two hundred miles away with my heart, in Forks, WA. I had proposed this impromptu hunt based on my discussion with Bella last night. If there was any chance that I was going to get closer to her over these next weeks I had to be sure that my appetite was sated. Not that it would ever change the way she smelled to me. But if there was any way to reconcile my tender love for Bella with all-consuming fire I felt when I touched her warm skin, I thought being well fed was part of the equation.

With perfect clarity I could remember the way she smelled to me on her first day of school over a year ago. The smell that made me doubt my carefully cultivated civility and nearly caused the monster in me to surface. And then my mind quickly strayed to the look she gave me as I glared at her, trying unsuccessfully to mask my animal thirst. That looked of fearful understanding was one of the most powerful things that held me back in Bella's presence. I never wanted her to look at me like that again.

I quickly checked myself. I did tend to wallow in the negative. Here Bella had agreed to be my wife, she had said yes to me in the most absolute sense of the word. She wanted me. It defied explanation and it made me happier than I had ever been in my long existence.

I purposefully tried to shift my mind toward more pleasing thoughts, and I ran through some of my favorites. I easily pictured the creamy candlelit blush of Bella's skin against a blue blouse on our first dinner 'date'. Then my mind strayed to the ecstatic rush I felt having Bella in my arms the first day I brought her to my bedroom. I flitted to the memory of folding her body into mine on our trip back from Italy. Remembering the way she took me back, so easily and so certainly, awed me and humbled me all at once. It also brought on pain and a wave of gut wrenching guilt. But I took a deep breath and caught myself. Instead, I thought of our first kiss, and all the hundreds of kisses since, remembering each one with perfect clarity.

I could still feel the burn of her lips on my earlobe from last night. Almost certainly Bella could never feel the intensity of emotion I felt for her. Her heart would burst. If I had a human heart it would be in a million pieces. As it was, I almost felt an ache in my own lifeless chest, and a low groan escaped from my throat.

I noticed Emmett finishing up with his prey, wiping his mouth and hands on his shirt, politely ignoring my groan. He turned to bound over to where I was sitting. I quickly held my head in my hands. Luckily Emmett couldn't read my thoughts like I could read his. The ridicule would have been never-ending. But I was sure my face would give me away, and I kept it hidden.

Emmett was still regaling in our family's recent battle with an army of newborn vampires. He had been replaying it for the past week with whoever would listen. Of course, since I could hear his thoughts, I had heard more about it than anyone else in my family. Emmett was the strongest, most physical vampire I had ever met, and it was hard on him never being able to completely flex his muscle. Our short battle was the most action that he had ever seen. His ebullience was clearly apparent as he sprinted over and playfully punched my arm.

"_Hey thanks for saving us from wedding planning, big brother,_" Emmett thought, grinning. "_Alice even managed to rope Rose into it this morning._" Alice was an event-planning force to be reckoned with. Only she could get Rose to help with our wedding. Then I smiled involuntarily at the phrase "our wedding".

"_But I'm surprised you were able to tear yourself away from Bella today_," Emmett continued silently, "_now that you're practically married . . . I don't know man, I couldn't keep my hands off Rose when we were first together_."

There was no need for Emmett to remind me. He and Rosalie were like a demolition crew with their newfound love, knocking down walls, breaking furniture. Carlisle and Esme had to send them away for a few years to save our furniture and our sanity. Even now, it was hard to keep out of Emmett and Rosalie's thoughts enough to give them the privacy they deserved.

"You know it can't be like that with me and Bella," I reminded him out loud.

"_Leave it to you Edward to fall for a human. I couldn't hold out like you man. It's a good thing it was you, I guess_."

I lifted my head from my hands to look at Emmett and my expression clearly conveyed that while this was a good thing (a gross understatement), there was also an element of torture intertwined.

"Ha!" Emmett laughed out loud almost with glee. "_And here I think of you as the monastic picture of restraint. You want Bella more than you let on big brother. Is she keeping you in check?_"

My words came out before I could think, "I want her more than I've ever wanted anything. More than I thirst for her, if it's possible. And Emmett, she wants me too. It's almost more than I can bear to draw the line like I do again and again each night. I want her so much that I've agreed to the impossible."

"_The impossible?"_

"She wants a real honeymoon Emmett. Before she's been turned. I don't know if I can do it."

Emmett was laughing again. "_I was wondering what was up with the quickie nuptials. I'm never going to let my little sister live this one down!_"

"Emmett, I would appreciate it if you would never bring this up to Bella. It's not quite proper for me to even talk with you about this."

"_Sure, I'll be proper, until the wedding. When she's a happily married woman, the gloves are off. I should have guessed though. I kind of remember from when I was a human teenager. I couldn't think about anything else. You must remember a little how it felt_."

"No Emmett, I've never felt about anyone the way I feel for Bella."

"_Well yeah, when you're a vampire it's completely different. But I mean physically, when you were human_."

"No Emmett, I've never been with anyone while human or . . . otherwise."

"_At all?"_

I pressed my lips together and attempted my best menacing glare.

Emmett wasn't laughing now, just grinning. Maybe I hadn't completely lost my touch. "_Well if you ever want any pointers bro... But the way Bella looks at you, it seems you may be a natural. Anyway, you always worry too much, and you've got weeks to work out the details_."

"Bella thinks we should start working the details out now. She thinks it maybe too much for me all at once," I confessed quickly and under my breath, more to confirm the situation for myself than to unload further on my brother.

"_I've got to hand it to Bella, she's sneaky. But she's got a point. You have no idea what you're in for. After all these years you could really blow a gasket or something_." Emmett wasn't helping Bella's case and I was ready to end this conversation.

But he continued_, "The only thing I can compare it to is when you taste human blood. It's really close to feeling that good. Suddenly you're warm, you feel dizzy and so strong, charged. I don't know; I'm not good with words."_

I realized that I had been so judicious at screening out Emmett's sex life that I didn't know anything about the details, while human or afterward. "Emmett, would you mind telling me more about when you were human, about this part of being human in particular? Maybe it could help me to better understand Bella's feelings."

Emmett went in for a punch, and seeing exactly what was coming for me, I easily dodged out of the way. "I said I had sex, I didn't say I used to be a girl."

"Emmett, please. Humor me."

"_Well, OK. It's not really clear anymore, you know, it's pretty foggy. But I'll tell you what I can remember." _

"_There was this girl LeAnna. I was the captain of the football team, and she was the head cheerleader. For just about everybody at school there was no question we would end up together. She had this thick brown hair that hung down her back and always curled at the ends. And these really pretty eyes that changed from gray to green depending on the weather"_

Emmett's eyes lost their focus and clouded over, and he sat down next to me as he continued, _"After I graduated from high school, I started working full time at the garage were my dad worked. He was a mechanic. There wasn't much work, with the depression, but I'd bring an extra dollar or two home each week, and it helped. LeAnna's family was sending her to college in Charleston. Her daddy was one of the owners of the zinc mine in town. Made a lot of money during the war. We talked and talked about how I would make my way to Charleston, find a job in a fancy garage and finally put a ring on her finger."_

"_Just about then her daddy dropped off his car at our garage. A big green 1933 Plymouth DeLux. The problem was, we needed to order parts for something so fancy, and so it stayed there for a few weeks. LeAnna came to visit me one day as I was closing up the shop, and that's when we started fumbling around in the back seat of her daddy's car. I just remember the way her skin felt so soft, and the sound of her panting in my ear. We ended up crumpled, tired and sweaty each night, and I woke up each morning wanting more. The day the part came in, we knew we were about to lose our chance, so that night we were on a mission. It was sweet and way too quick and well, I remember it took my breath away. And it's all we thought about, and what we did every chance we got until she left for Charleston later that month. I saw her again at Christmastime, but she was different, seemed more used to city life. The idea of climbing into the backseat of a car with a mechanic seemed to embarrass her suddenly. She went back to school and I never saw her again."_

"_There were other girls after that. I don't remember them much at all. I was kind of lost after LeAnna left. Drank a lot, lost the job with my dad. There wasn't any money at home. We hunted a lot to put food on the table."_

I knew where this story was going, all of Emmett's stories either started or ended with the bear. But I let him finish, even though I'd heard it many times. It was true for everyone really; all stories inevitably start or end with birth and death.

"_I was wasted in the woods that day when I saw the bear. I just stood there. By the time I remembered I had a gun I couldn't use it right, then fumbled and dropped it on my toe. I remember thinking it hurt so damn much to drop the gun on my toe, right before the bear started tearing me up."_

"_I should have been dead, but then I woke up. I opened my eyes and there was Rose. So beautiful, the most amazing thing I've ever seen with her gold hair, her bright gold eyes. My angel, she made it all better."_

"_Anyway dude, let me tell you, while I would have traded almost anything to be with LeAnna one more time that winter, now I have more sensation in my little finger than I think I had in my whole body back then, It doesn't compare. And compared with what I remember a human kid being able to do, dude you are going to blow Bella's mind."_

"Thank you, Emmett."

Emmett grinned, his naturally jovial countenance winning out over the sincerity of his story._ "You know, for a vampire that loves baseball as much as you do, it's kind of funny that you've never even made it to second base_." With that he went in for a quick jab, but reading his intentions, I was able to duck and quickly tackle him from an unsuspected angle. A thunderous series of cracks echoed through the forest as our bodies collided and then tumbled down the rocky slope from our perch. I wrestled with more intensity than usual, a bit more intent on besting Emmett this afternoon. He fought back, always happy to exercise his formidable muscle.

We both looked up as Jasper came into view on the horizon. "Wait until Jazz hears about this."

I shot him a warning glance, "At least not in my presence Emmett."

"_Sure bro."_

Jasper jogged up to us. "I just got a call from Alice. She needs Emmett and me for some wedding stuff after all. Something you're not supposed to know about, Edward."

"_Fat chance of that ever happening_," Emmett thought.

"Emmett, she said she needs us back soon. We should go, she sounded pretty stressed." Only Alice could get this flustered with perfecting the details for a small family wedding - something I was deeply grateful for. I would have to find a way to thank Alice for this. And I started playing her recent thoughts back in my head, looking for one thing that would make her happier than anything else.

We made our way to Emmett's Jeep, and he spun out onto the highway, back towards Forks. Jasper's mind was only on Alice, clearly anxious about the panic he heard in her voice. Emmett on the other hand surprised me, his thoughts taking a much more contemplative path than usual.

"_Carlisle is always talking about how our morality makes us more bonded together. By how consciously deciding to not kill humans, we form more of a human loving bond and stuff. But maybe it's because without fulfilling our basic desire, we focus on the next best thing. So we bond and love more fiercely than the others because it's all we have. And it's amazing, but it's not the same. Is love and sex just a substitute? If it is just a substitute, is that somehow wrong? And Edward's been going so long without killing humans or love or sex either, how did the guy go on? His world is about to be rocked." _

Emmett's thoughts suddenly stopped and he looked over at me next to him in the front seat of the Jeep._ "Hey sorry, didn't mean to talk about you right in front of you like that."_

"No Emmett, you really have given me a lot to consider." And I spent the rest of the ride back to Forks doing just that, considering.


	4. Offense

"Go get her tiger!" I spoke out loud for Jasper's benefit and I grinned as we let my brother off at the drive. Edward rolled his eyes, his lips pressed together in a straight line.

"I have your word Emmett, no teasing Bella. I'm lucky she's going through with the wedding, I don't need her dreading my family as well."

"Of course Edward, but we didn't mention your name at all when we made this deal. You'll just have to suffer."

I pulled the Jeep sharply out onto the road and peeled out, shouting the words to "Take Me Out to the Ball Game" as loud as I could, in my mind. Edward, the proverbial hero and villain rolled into one, turned to walk up the drive, into the sunset.

"Ha! No wonder Edward's always been so serious." I turned to Jasper who was climbing into the front seat. "Can you imagine? Edward's never had sex, not in over one hundred years! Not even once! It's not right. Do you think he'll go through with it with Bella?"

"Well, I'm sure he'll have to analyze it from each angle, possibly do some research, and pass it by Carlisle for approval," Jasper joked. Don't get me wrong, Jazz and I love Edward, but he can be a little bookish and analytical.

"I'll bet one thousand dollars, no," Jasper continued, "not till she's turned."

"You're on then. I say yes, but after the wedding. But I guess we'll just have to beat it out of him, how else will we have proof? Wait, Alice would know, don't you think?"

"Alice tries to stay out of our bedrooms. But she's never had to try before with Edward, I guess. Anyway, she'd never tell."

"What top-secret wedding business does Alice need us for anyway? It's not like we can keep anything from Edward while we're all in the same house. He'll be onto us before we're up the driveway."

"We're about to find out." Jasper stated the obvious as we pulled into the empty lot outside of Newton's Olympic Outfitters. Alice was perched on the hood of her yellow Porsche. Her eyes were closed. There were lines of worry etched into her little elf face, accentuated by the fading light, and definitely out of place.

Jasper jumped out of the Jeep before I stopped. He was at Alice's side, feeling out her emotions. His eyes instantly widened, alarmed, and then I saw him going to work trying to calm Alice down.

"What's the matter? Floral emergency? Linen catastrophe? Chill out Alice!" I quipped, walking over to meet her.

"Jazz, Emm, this is serious. Bella is in trouble, the wedding is in trouble." Alice stated, her tone a tad calmer than the words conveyed. Jasper was good like that.

"OK Alice, take a step back and tell us what's going on," Jasper said smoothly. I saw the waves of alarm continue to wash off Alice as she looked into Jasper's eyes.

"Well," she started, grabbing Jasper's hands for comfort, "I was with Bella and then I saw Jane. A flash, but I'm getting more and more of them as Jane makes up her mind. She is going to Aro, Marcus and Caius with a proposal. Jane doesn't like Bella, I don't think she's ever been stopped before, and she seems to think that Bella has a power over us, the way we stand by her. And she sees that Aro is already interested in her as a human and she's jealous. I think the last thing Jane wants is for Bella to be a vampire. I see her playing on Aro and Caius. She's exaggerating our win with the newborns, saying that we might threaten the Volturi supremacy. She is trying to convince the Volturi to send a party out now, immediately. She says that we broke our pact, that Bella is still human. She says it's been too long. Jane wants Bella dead."

Sure sounded like Jane. That little vamp was vicious.

Speaking her visions out loud seemed to deflate Alice and she leaned fully on Jasper for support. "They are going to come, soon, before the wedding. The only chance we have is that Aro isn't convinced. Right now I see two outcomes, but they're both pretty bad, guys. Either the Volturi send a contingent here and Bella dies, that's the outcome Jane wants. Or the Vultori come and they convince Bella to change. If this happens, Aro will want her; he's already planning on threatening Edward to get Bella to go with him. That option could be pretty easy with Bella being a newborn."

Why were we all just standing around in the parking lot? "Let's get to the house and tell the others. This means a fight. We have to get ready to kill these - "

"Emm, you have to calm down!" Annoyingly enough, I was calming down. Thanks Jasper. Sometimes he could be so annoying. "Emmett, please think first. We can't tell Edward and Bella about this. If we tell them, Bella will feel compelled to turn now, before the wedding. Edward and Carlisle don't want this decision forced on her. There will be a huge argument. If she's not a vampire, we'll be forced to fight. Either way it's not going to be pleasant, and it's going to ruin everything."

"This isn't the way it was supposed to be," Alice continued, "Edward and Bella have been fighting for their love since they met. Finally guys, I could see their wedding perfectly. I could see Edward, completely happy. Can you imagine? Edward. Happy. Bella is my best friend, our sister; we can't let her die. We can't force her to change her plans, cancel her wedding, miss out on everything because of Jane." Alice spat out Jane's name. "Edward was about to have his dream come true, and now it's fading and blurry."

"Yeah, Edward was about to have a lot of things."

Alice shot me an icy look. "Not exactly where I was going with that, Emm."

"Listen Alice, I hear you. But we can't keep this from Edward. He doesn't even have to read my thoughts. It's going to be all over my face. Let's just go tell him, then do this thing."

"No Emmett, listen to Alice. I think she has a plan." Jasper was getting on board with Alice. Great, it was going to be two against one.

"Thanks Jazz, I do." Alice pulled herself upright, trying to look like an authority, I guess. "You guys need to go, now. I've taken the liberty of packing your bags. I'm going to tell everyone that I saw some minor trouble for Peter and Charlotte. Maria might be paying them a visit. So you guys went to them because we didn't want to bring trouble to Forks right before the wedding."

"I have a feeling we're not meeting Peter and Charlotte though."

"No. I want you to deliver this wedding invitation to Aro. It's a sign of good faith, to show that we don't have anything to hide. Hopefully we can counter all of Jane's negativity. Jasper can help with that."

"And what am I supposed to do?"

"Just be yourself Emmett. There's no way to keep the truth off of your face, anyone would know your intentions are true from a mile away."

"And Carlisle?" I asked

"Carlisle has the hospital. And Edward would know something was terribly wrong if Carlisle left without a word. No, he stays here with Esme and Edward and…" Alice paused to turn toward Jasper and then leaned her forehead against his shoulder. "I can't go Jazz. Bella would freak and the wedding would fall apart. Carlisle would know something was up. I have to stay here and make things run smoothly; make things seem all calm and normal. I'll try to do your usual job." Jasper pulled Alice closer, staring into her eyes. A swift nod of his head was all it took to show he agreed.

"It seems you and I are always going to Italy alone these days. And we never even get to shop," Alice pouted. "Promise me you're coming back Jasper?" she asked with an undercurrent of urgency to her voice, looking into his eyes.

"Of course," Jasper answered too quickly, and a look of mutual understanding passed between them. It was a promise that had been made before, one that they both knew couldn't be made in good faith.

"What are you guys going on about?" I tried to brighten the mood. "We're delivering an invitation. We're talking up Bella, letting everyone know how damn bad she wants to be a vampire. There's no reason to worry about not coming back." But then I worried that maybe Alice was smoothing things over a bit. Making it seem a little more non-threatening than it might be. "Alice, do you see something?"

"No Emmett, I only see two possibilities now, with some blurring around the edges because you two are deciding to go. It's just that we need to change the future completely in just a few weeks. And it's hard not being the one to do it."

"Then you should come."

"No. I'm almost certain things will be better if I stay here."

"But how are you going to keep this from Edward?"

"I've done it before, Emmett. I just have to think "wedding, wedding, wedding." There's actually a lot to arrange, and I'm known to go overboard. Of course Edward will suspect something's up, but I have an answer for that too."

I arched my brows and folded my arms waiting for Alice to go on. I wasn't convinced anyone could keep information from Edward.

"Well," she looked at the ground, "all of the sudden there are lots of future visions of Edward and Bella that I've been desperate to block out. I'll just allude to that. Knowing Edward, it should stop his questioning cold."

"Ha! I knew it. You owe me Jazz."

"Not yet, we never settle bets on visions of the future. I'll wait it out, I'm still not convinced," he countered.

I stopped for a half second to consider leaving Forks for Italy. No football tomorrow in the clearing. I wouldn't have to help Rose with that tune-up. No problem, she could do it herself anyway. Wait! "Whoa, Alice. What about Rose? I can't leave without saying goodbye to her. I can't lie to her. She would see right through me. And she will never let me leave without her."

"I thought about that Emmett. She's on her way. I called her too. She just wanted to wait for her nails to dry. It should be up to her to decide whether she goes."

"You think she's going to want to go out of her way to help Bella." That was crazy talk.

"No, but I know she deserves the choice. And I know she'll want to be by your side. But if she chooses not to go, I think she may have to spend the summer in Denali. Once she knows about this, she can't hang around Edward." Alice scrunched her nose. She didn't say it, but I figured she thought Rose would let all of this slip around Edward out of spite. I love Rose, but Alice might not be too far off base.

"She's going to hate this, Alice." Jasper said, stating the obvious again.

Alice's red convertible swung into the parking lot. She gracefully jumped over the door, and was by my side in another bound. She circled her arms around me and began kissing my neck instead of saying hi. I tried hard to concentrate on everything that Alice had said, because I suddenly just wanted to take Rose back to the car. She was too tempting in a red summery dress that showed off all of her curves.

"So what's up? More planning for the _wedding_?" The distaste was not hidden in Rose's voice. In her defense, she was just upset because her and Bella seemed to have different values. Rose wanted to be human, and that wasn't in the cards for her anymore. Bella wanted to be a vampire, and now she was getting her wish. Rose felt like Bella was stomping all over her biggest dream, and she took it personally. The fact that we were talking about Rose's wish and Bella's life was lost on her. I loved her, but truly, everything that came into Rose's orbit was inevitably about her.

I thought the explanation for this meet-up might be better coming from me. "Not exactly, Rose. There's a problem and Edward and Bella need our help," I started. But Rose was quick to interrupt.

"Surprise, surprise! What's it this time? Sasquatch wants a piece of her? Is an army of aliens coming to hunt fragile Bella down? What do those two want us to do this time?"

"Rosalie," Alice tried this time, "Edward and Bella don't know anything about this. Jane wants to bring the Volturi here immediately to kill Bella, and I want us to stop them."

The seriousness of the situation silenced Rose; I could see an awkward look pass across her face, like she may have been embarrassed by her brash attitude. Rosalie was really nice, deep down. But she quickly re-arranged her features to give an air of business-like inquiry. "What is your plan, Alice? Are the others on their way here?"

"Rose baby, Jazz and I are going to Volterra. We're going to bear witness to Bella and Edward's intentions. Alice wants Bella and Edward to stay focused on the wedding and stuff. She doesn't want to mess this up for them. So we're getting as few of us involved in this as possible. I think she's right."

"Is this for real? Emm, really?" Rosalie asked me.

"It's all set Rose, except that I couldn't leave without seeing you. Alice says you should have the choice about whether you want to go. But baby, I don't want to bring you to the Volturi. I don't want to see you in danger like that. Go to Denali; hang out with Tanya, Kate and Irina. I'll be back really soon."

"Emmett Ames McCarty Cullen, you are not going anywhere without me." Rose actually stomped her foot.

"I knew you'd say that Rose, I packed a bag for you. I hope you don't mind," Alice chimed.

"Alice, I'm sure you did a better job than I ever could."

"Really, Rose?" Now it was my turn to ask her. "You're going?" She hugged me ferociously as an answer.

"Wait, wait. Emmett, what if you're too concerned about protecting Rosalie? We'll need all our focus, no distractions." Jasper was always thinking strategy.

"You are not going to fight!" Alice was on her feet, in Jasper's face. She held his arms, "This is not a fight!" she almost shouted in his face. She looked at me and at Rose, "You are going on a peace-keeping mission. I have to trust you boys to stay calm. Going with thoughts of fighting is a death wish. This is not a fight." She finished much softer than she had started.

"When do we leave Alice?" Rose asked softly, probably trying to bring Alice back down to earth.

"Your plane leaves in three hours, 27 minutes, on time." Alice was still disconcerted. "It's Delta flight 498, with a connecting flight to Rome in Miami. You're all good with this? It's your last chance."

"If anyone has any objections to this mission, let them speak now or forever hold their peace." I said in my best preacher impression. No one laughed.

"Alice, you're sure about this?" Rose asked. "We've never done anything like this before without Carlisle."

"If he knew, I think Carlisle would be proud," Jasper said. "We've never done anything like this before because it never would have occurred to us. Carlisle has been our conscience."

"Remember," Alice said as Jasper, Rose and I piled into the Jeep, a definite buzz in the air, "I've seen Bella changed before her birthday in September. Focus on Aro; tell him we're keeping our end of the agreement. If we haven't done anything wrong, there is no reason for them to come to Forks."

I gunned the engine and Alice assured us that she'd handle all of the stranded cars. It felt really good to be doing this, like maybe I had been in the background of my family's life for far too long. As the lights of downtown Forks faded behind us, I remembered a very different family meeting from last year, one where Jasper, Rose and I were looking for Carlisle's permission to end Bella's life. Jasper was right, we never would have thought to do this before. It seemed Bella Swan might have changed all of us for the better.


	5. Alone

After Alice left I threw myself into elaborate dinner preparations, trying to keep my mind from taking off in directions that made me uncomfortable. And there were many topics that could easily send me into a panic. First of all, thoughts of my wedding still resulted in a faint quaking in my knees. And of course it was hard to reconcile that Jacob was going to miss the most important day of my life, and that it was my own fault. Then there was the thought of sending Aro an invitation to the wedding. It seemed dangerous at best, and likely to end the lives of my dearest loved ones at worst. Finally, my heart beat a little unevenly whenever I thought about Edward's forthcoming answer to last night's request. Alice seemed so sure about what his answer would be. My heart started beating unevenly again, so I threw myself with renewed vigor into preparing vegetable lasagna with both homemade béchamel and red sauce. I didn't skimp on the salad either, combining some baby greens, toasted pumpkin seeds, and roasted red pepper and goat cheese. I managed to keep my mind mostly occupied from afternoon until evening with only one minor injury, burning my thumb as I took the bell pepper out of the broiler.

But even with my over the top dinner, Charlie maintained his grumpy silence of the past few nights. With no conversation, dinner was over too quickly. So I washed the dishes thoroughly and dried them all by hand. I tried watching whatever game Charlie had on T.V., but I should have known it was hopeless. There was no part of a baseball game that could put my mind to rest. I faked a yawn, overacting only slightly. If Charlie noticed, he didn't let on.

"I'm kind of tired dad. I think I'll head up to bed."

"Good night, Bells. Hey, where's Edward this evening?" Charlie clearly grimaced while saying Edward's name. Hopefully he would get over that reaction in time for the wedding. But then he seemed to come out of his fog and brighten a bit as he glanced around his house and took in my fiancé's absence. The word fiancé still caused my stomach to turn though, and I decided a quick retreat upstairs was in order.

"He went on a hike with his brothers again. He'll be back tomorrow, I think"

"Those boys are always out on the trail. You think Edward will get you into the wilderness after you two, are uh, married?" The sentences started easily enough, but Charlie had to choke out the end. The bit of light I noticed only a minute ago was instantly extinguished, and I wasn't sure he cared to continue the conversation.

"I don't think so, dad. Good night." I supposed Charlie had reason enough to disapprove of Edward, least of all marrying his daughter straight out of high school. I honestly wanted to give him some room to work this out for himself, but eventually this was going to have to stop.

"Mm hm." Charlie eyed me as I walked up the stairs slowly, my stomach churning. I felt that Edward must be back, so I went straight to the bathroom. I took a long shower and shaved my legs just in case. In case of what? I didn't even know. My heart started knocking around in my chest again as I considered this, so I let the hot water stream over me until it ran cold. I brushed my hair out the best I could and surveyed the tank top and cotton drawstring pajama bottoms I had stashed in the bathroom. They would have to do.

Taking a deep breath, I walked across the short landing to the door of my room. Before I could give myself a chance to hyperventilate, I grabbed the doorknob and threw the door open. But as I peered inside it became quickly evident that Edward wasn't back. It was also evident that I hadn't been picking up after myself lately, what with the recent war against twenty vampires, and my engagement to another. I busied myself by tidying my room. Then I checked my email. There were three messages from Renee in the past two days, each one gushing about my wedding. I forwarded them all to Alice, and then sent my mom a brief note explaining that with regard to the wedding, she should email Alice and Esme directly in the future. No, not so bad. I could do this.

When Edward still hadn't come I looked through my books, searching for something to reread. Nothing appealed to me. So instead, I leafed through a stack of CDs that Edward had recently brought over. I popped in a new one by a Seattle band that Emmett was really into lately. The first couple songs were poppy and jangly and full of silly nonsense lyrics, really catchy. I could see why Emmett would like it, even though I think hip-hop was usually his thing. But this was so happy, totally Emmett.

However it all changed with one of the last songs on the album. It still had an urgent beat, but the tone changed. Suddenly, it was like my heart was raw, it brought out such emotion. I took out the jacket to read the sad lyrics, and they didn't make much sense, just like the rest of the album. But there was a feeling of loss and regret, and the sense that something you once had, you didn't anymore. There was a line about disappearing and turning into rain, and suddenly I was desperate. Where was Edward? Why wasn't he back?

I suddenly felt like everything had been a dream. I didn't know if Edward could be mine. Glancing at the cell phone, it didn't even seem like I could call him. The song was over; tears were streaming down my face. But this was silly, it was just a song, and Edward had been gone for less than twenty-four hours. Exhausted, I turned off the CD player and climbed into bed, unsure of my emotions.

That night I dreamed I was on an expedition on a ship in the Arctic, thick fog closing in on us from all sides. All around us were ice flows, and there was the snowy tundra of frozen land ahead. But as the ship came closer to land, the ice packs began to crowd closer to the boat, keeping the shore out of our reach. The ice boxed us in, with no way forward and no way back.

I realized that this mission must be crazy; we should never have gone this way, this far, for some elusive prize. The sun hugged the horizon through the night, never completely setting, and I knew I should try to sleep. But I became desperate as the ice pushed against the hull, threatening to tear the metal. The grating sound of the ice against metal was familiar and horrifying, and I searched for any way to make it stop. In my dream I held my hands to my ears, crying and pleading "No!"

Icy wind blew across my face and I shuddered. Only then a voice familiar and velvety smooth said simply, "It's OK, I'm here now." The sun rose on the horizon and a path that had been hidden before seemed very obvious, and the ship was able to easily make its way to the shore.


	6. The Stuff of Legends

I walked slowly up the drive toward the house, pleased to have some time alone. But instead of making my way back to the house, I broke into a sprint and took to the forest in an attempt to keep my mind from dwelling on Bella's wishes. A damp summer breeze ruffled my hair, bringing with it the tart smell of wild salmonberry and thimbleberry ripening on the bushes in the underbrush. But instead of clearing my mind, the effortless speed of my run only seemed to enhance the difference between Bella and I.

Emmett's thoughts crowded in on mine. He believed we bonded and loved fiercely as a substitute for what we wanted most. I certainly desired Bella more than I knew was possible. Were the love and passion I felt for her only a substitute for my hunger? What if I was just fooling myself, and put myself in the perfect position to let the monster within win out in the end? No, it was impossible that an emotion this intense, that was able to transform me so completely, could be a substitute for anything.

I sighed as I ran; not even running could keep my mind from following a dozen trains of thought at once. If only I had to think about where to place my feet, judge when to dodge a tree limb, calculate a leap over a stream, perhaps then my mind might be able to let go.

I thought about the silence with which I ran through the forest. My steps were so controlled that I ran soundlessly through the trees. It wasn't with intense strength, but with unnatural delicacy. I stopped at a river running across my path. Kneeling down, I carefully skimmed my hand over the surface of the water, gentle enough to avoid creating ripples. It was true that as much as I possessed infinite strength, I was also capable of a more delicate touch than any human could imitate. I had complete control and awareness of every cell of my body. I turned to watch a spider spinning her web among the branches of the Indian plum to my right. I caressed the strands of the web, collecting the water droplets that hung on it in my palm, careful not to disturb her creation. If I could just be sure to touch Bella this way, then maybe . . .

I ran back to the house thinking I would just change my clothes before leaving for Charlie's house, hoping that my decision would be made on the way. But as I left my room I could hear Carlisle and Esme in his study.

"We should speak to him before he leaves again," I heard Esme say, "just so we know what we need to be prepared for."

"Yes, of course."

"_Edward_?" Their thoughts called to me in unison.

I reached the door just as Esme was opening it from the other side. "_You're home_." She placed her hands on my shoulders to smile at me, and then pulled me in for a hug. This greeting had become standard since Bella and I announced or engagement.

"We were just discussing you and Bella," Esme said out loud this time. "I was wondering about your plans for after the wedding." She looked up to Carlisle and he nodded. "Should we have Carlisle's study ready for the wedding night? We know how eager Bella is, and we would like to have everything ready, so the two of you can start your lives together." Esme smiled in earnest.

I worked to keep my facial features calm. "No, not that night."

"Yes, we considered that, with her family in town. And Tanya may want to stay and visit for a few days. In that case, we just have to arrange accommodations for everyone–"

"Actually Bella and I would like some time alone, as husband and wife, before she turns. We'll be flying out right after our wedding."

"Oh, yes, yes, I hadn't - " then Esme stopped abruptly and her hands fluttering up to her mouth. "_Oh my. No. I hadn't thought -_" But then she stopped herself again. Carlisle reached one arm around her shoulders and used his other hand to clasp both of hers, bringing them to her waist. "Yes, of course. A honeymoon, how lovely." Carlisle's jaunty smile was a well-worn mask.

"_Edward we should talk, son_."

"_I hope I didn't hurt his feelings just now. I should leave."_

Ah yes, the proverbial father son talk about sex. I wonder how many discussions included specific cautions on not killing or maiming the bride. How many ways could I endanger the life of my beloved? I seemed to find new avenues almost weekly. Perhaps I was insane to even entertain these thoughts.

Carlisle gave Esme a loving look, and a mutual pause of understanding passed easily between them. Esme smiled at him, then looked at me warmly. There was a certain brightness in her eyes betraying her concern. "I'm so happy for you dear," she managed, and left the room without another word.

I turned to face Carlisle. "Is it even possible?"

Carlisle paused. "_Edward, I want to make sure I find the right words. In the past I feel many of my reactions to your ideas and feelings toward Bella may have implied that I don't have faith in you_."

"On the contrary, I feel you may have far too much trust in my judgment."

"_As I see it, you consistently underestimate yourself. The careful control you have shown in your relationship with Bella is beyond anything I have ever seen before, with vampire or mortal. And the love, concern, and respect you show for others has made me proud to call you son. You have been irrevocably changed, and it has been a privilege to watch._"

"_But back to the topic at hand. I thought your plan was to turn Bella after the wedding. Wouldn't it be more prudent to wait until afterwards for a physical union? This doesn't have to be a dangerous encounter for her_."

"Bella wants this one specific human experience before she's turned. She doesn't know what her newborn feelings for me will be. She wants to make sure that she isn't losing anything by choosing this life, and I can't deny her that. I told her only that we would try."

"_Edward, if there was any vampire alive that could do this, I believe it would be you. Because of the restraint that you show daily, and because of your feelings for the person you will be with_."

"_You are certainly not the first vampire to be physically drawn to a human_." Carlisle continued, "_The ultimate physical gratification for our kind with a human is not simply sexual, but of a more gastrointestinal nature. Humans are left drained of their blood; authorities suspect rape or various cults. Of course, this isn't inevitable. You may find your Denali cousins could be a first-hand resource for you on this count. But there is more than just sexual attraction between you and Bella. I feel certain your love will guide you, I don't believe you are a danger to her in this way._"

"_Of course the other obstacle would be your physical strength. Something you've no doubt considered. You'll need to keep yourself in check, your wits about you. You see, at the height of this experience, our minds let go and our bodies take over. Freedom from our usual hyper-aware state is an amazing release. Suddenly there are no thoughts, in comparison to a thousand at once. You would have to resist this. I'm afraid this won't be easy, and it may not be completely gratifying_."

"Is it even worth it to put her in danger this way?"

"_Son, I would say no if it weren't for the love you feel for Bella. I've told you of the human outcome when vampires sexually prey on humans. But vampires that engage in this activity are also left for the worse. These encounters often pervert our nature, turning us into a different kind of monster than the term vampire implies_."

"An incubus?" I spat. Could my love for Bella take me to lows of such legendary proportion?

"_Yes, I fear these encounters may be at the root of those stories. But these legends are just human interpretations of the supernatural world, not completely trustworthy accounts."_

"_However, Edward, when love and lust are combined and expressed physically it is something so powerfully good, it also changes us completely, eternally. It is something that can't be undone, and that every one of us should be lucky enough to have. It is something I want for you. You never choose the easy way Edward, in all things, love included. I trust you to make the right choice. And if this is your choice, I believe truly that Bella will remain unharmed_."

"_I'm afraid I can't be of more help to you with the specifics. Perhaps Tanya could be a valuable resource on the finer points_."

I noticed a slight upturn at the corners of Carlisle's mouth. Perhaps if he actually saw some small bit of humor in this conversation, there was a chance that he was right. However, I was certainly not going to consult Tanya on this matter. No one in my family new about the depth of Tanya's feelings toward me, I could spare her that much. I certainly could not ask her to help me consummate my love for Bella. I would have to go without that.

Carlisle and I both turned toward the front of the house as we heard the sound of Alice's tires turn from the highway onto the drive.

"We can continue this conversation later, if you'd like." Carlisle assured. "Alice was with Bella most of the day ironing out the finer points of your wedding, and this evening she gathered your siblings together. I don't have to read minds to guess that she's planning on accosting you tonight."

As if to confirm Carlisle's suspicions I could hear Alice's thoughts as the car neared the house, "_Flowers: lilac, orange blossom, jasmine? Lilac, orange blossom, foxglove? Freesia, orange blossom, jasmine? Jasmine, freesia, foxglove? Sunflowers? Daisies?_"

I pressed my lips together and rolled my eyes. "_Edward she means well, and I'm sure you will be delighted with the outcome,_" Carlisle gently scolded.

"_Edward_!" It was Alice. "_Get Carlisle and Esme together and meet me downstairs. There is a situation that we have to discuss. Lily, azalea, lilac? Brown-Eyed Susan, sunflower, forsythia? Hyacinths, Hyacinths! Hyacinths . . ._"

"Carlisle, Alice wants us to meet her downstairs. She didn't say why exactly, but perhaps to discuss flowers?" I smirked.

Carlisle collected Esme from her study and we gathered around the dining room table, waiting. No more than a minute later Alice danced in through the front door, and came to stand at the opposite end of the table.

"I saw a vision that Maria was planning to confront Peter and Charlotte on their recent travels to The Yukon." She explained straight off, without any pleasantries. "_Daisies, lilies, marigolds."_ "Jasper felt obliged to be there to smooth things over. He feels responsible for the bad blood there. Emmett decided to go along for the hunt, reindeer, possibly polar bear along the way." "_Lily, lily, freesia, lily_." "Rose went too."

Somehow Alice seemed almost pleased with herself, like a child that has just finished an oral report and wants to rush off the stage. She smiled a strained smile at the three of us from across the table.

"_Freesia, marigold, lilac, orange blossom?"_

"Oh Alice! Why did they leave without saying goodbye?" Esme was clearly hurt and worried.

"They thought they would just leave quickly in order to get back with plenty of time for Edward and Bella's wedding."

"Alice, will they be OK? Is there any danger in their plans?" Carlisle was also alarmed by my siblings' sudden departure.

"No, I haven't seen any hint of a threat from Maria. Jazz is just helping out a good friend." "_Marigold, brown-eyed Susan, iris? Iris, hyacinth, lavender?"_

"I should call Peter, see if I can be of assistance."

"No, they're out of range in The Yukon!" Alice responded, a bit of alarm in her voice.

"At the very least I'd like to speak with my sons. Esme, let's get them on the phone. I'm pleased at their eagerness to help Peter and Charlotte, but it seems a much too hasty. I want to make sure this has been well thought out."

"Well, I was thinking I might jet out for a quick bite. Ha, ha! I might look for something a little farther from home than usual. Maybe I'll see you all in the morning?" Alice spoke quickly and turned to go.

Alice wasn't getting out of here so easily. Something was wrong and she couldn't keep me out of her thoughts forever. I stepped across her path purposefully, toying with the idea of tackling her if it became necessary.

"_Yes, Edward?"_ Alice thought innocently. "_Lily, hyacinth, poppy, marigold_."

"Enough with the flowers, Alice. As if you would ever seriously consider marigolds as part of a wedding bouquet! What are you keeping from me? Are things worse with Peter and Charlotte than you let on? Is it something with Bella?"

Alice was suddenly deep in concentration as she answered, "_Edward, I wouldn't think _you_ would have to ask_."

"I am quite clearly asking you Alice. And I would appreciate a straight answer." I was becoming impatient. "What is going on?"

And quickly, a flash from Alice's memory of the future: I was waist deep in moonlit water, waves gently splashing against my stone frame. I was undressed, waiting. Alice looked up at me defiant, "_Would you prefer that I focus on something besides flowers so that I can continue with this scenario?_" she challenged. "_You know, I've never had to filter out your future like this before. I thought you might like some privacy, but maybe I was wrong_."

That was unexpected, and it stopped my train of thought quite suddenly. "Well?" Alice asked out loud this time, "do you really mind if I recite flower arrangements?" Having a reminder that Alice could see our future so vividly changed the course of my thoughts completely.

"Alice, while I appreciate your decorum with respect to Bella's privacy, I do have one request. Would you please let me know if any decision I make will ever endanger Bella, physically or otherwise? Last year you warned me that my actions would do Bella more harm than good, and I refused to listen. It appears that my feelings for Bella have obscured my objectivity. Going forward, I will never disregard you in this respect. It is beyond important to me that I never cause Bella pain again, and never put her life in danger again. I couldn't bear it. You know that."

"Edward, you have my word. I love her too, we all do. It is not just you looking out for Bella's future. Any of us would do everything in our power to keep Bella safe. Know that." Alice usually devious face was very serious. Her sincerity was clear.

"Alice, Carlisle said there might be something you wanted to ask me," I remembered.

"Oh." Alice's face relaxed just slightly. "_I noticed that one of the invitations is missing."_

I reflexively pressed my lips together. "That's not really a question." I knew Alice was just protecting Bella, but this was none of her business.

"_She doesn't want him there. She told me today. I think you should talk to her before you do this_."

"I already know what she would say. She doesn't want to hurt him, or to hurt me."

"_Maybe you should consider that."_

"I will always consider Bella's feelings first. This is her wedding after all." Alice was scrutinizing me, seeking out something else in my eyes. It was harder to protect my emotions now that they were so close to the surface. I struggled to remain unreadable.

"There's more to it than that, isn't there?" Alice asked out loud.

I tried to look away, blinking in hopes that I could bring some other emotion to the forefront besides the doubt that was clinging to the edge of my happiness.

"You're still waiting to lose her, aren't you?"

There was no hiding now. Alice hit the mark. I felt my heart surge up through my chest, through my throat. My words were a rough whisper, "She deserves every opportunity to say no. His is the only objection that could sway her."

"_It's time to accept that Bella is yours. Don't send the invitation. It's foolish. After all of my planning, you're trying to sabotage your own wedding."_

"That's not it. I owe her every chance to say no. Anyway, it's already done."

"_But none of the other invitations have even been sent out yet." _

"Anything else, Alice?"

Alice wasn't even slightly appeased. Frustration and anger colored her face. I wasn't sure if she was more upset at my reasoning, or the fact that an invitation was sent out of turn. She looked like she would like to stomp away immediately, but her job as party planner kept her in the room.

"I was wondering if you would prefer a piano solo or a string quartet for a certain piece of music," Alice implored through gritted teeth. She put her hands to her temples in deep concentration, her mind silent now, but her voice slowly picking out a series of notes I knew well. Again, I saw a quick flash, an involuntary hiccup on Alice's part. But this was something I had seen before, something I had dreamed of the first night I watched Bella as she slept. It was Bella, smiling and radiant, in a lace wedding dress, walking down the aisle on her wedding day. Just as quickly it was gone. Obviously this was something Alice was closely guarding.

I took a deep, staggering breath. "Alice, I've never told a soul about that."

"What do you mean Edward?" She was oblivious. I composed myself.

"Wagner's March." I said softly.

"It's what will be playing as Bella walks down the aisle to you on your wedding day, of course."

"How did you know about that?"

Alice looked confused. "Edward, what are you talking about? I see the future, remember?"

"I dreamed Bella might someday walk down the aisle to that march more than a year ago." My breath was shallow, my vision narrowing.

"Maybe I'm not the only fortune teller in the family after all. But really Edward, everyone uses it." The anger in Alice's voice was ebbing. "Solo or quartet?"

That melody was clearly part of the vision I had as I watched Bella sleeping, over a year ago. The idea of Bella belonging to someone else had been so intolerable that I gave up my dream of a third option for Bella's future, the option of staying away. That was the night that I decided to be a part of Bella's life. This was the exact vision that had just appeared to me as a snapshot in Alice's mind.

Suddenly I realized how much I needed to be with Bella, to have her in my arms. I had heard enough, thought enough, but there was never really any decision to make. The realization that the vision of Bella on her wedding day had not been one of exclusion, but one that portended our shared destiny made things suddenly clear. It had always been Bella, our separate futures were one, and in a way I never thought they could be. There was no way I could stay away from her any longer. And the next four weeks opened up before me like an epic poem, possibly difficult, but long and sweet.

"Alice, I really must go. Take care hunting alone." And I was out the door quickly, bounding toward Forks, exultant.

As I climbed in Bella's bedroom window I saw that she was already asleep. She was tossing and murmuring incoherently, her blanket and sheet in knots at her feet. It was all that I could do not to wake her. "It's O.K., I'm here my dear. I came back to say yes. I am yours completely. It was always yes, even when I didn't know it." I pulled the sheet up to cover her frame and watched her sign in her sleep. Her limbs relaxed and she murmured, "Finally." Her breathing was now steady and deep. I gingerly settled next to her on the cramped twin bed, lightly stroking her cheek, the touch of her skin burning the tips of my fingers. I spent the rest of the night watching the moonlight trace a path across my love's face, and my touch was as soft as the moonlight itself, as gentle as a the mist that fell on the hemlocks and cedars outside.


	7. Acquiescence

I woke with a chill, pulling the blanket closer around my frame. Without consciously putting words to my excitement, my eyes flew open. Edward was lying next to me, his golden eyes meeting mine, my favorite crooked smile on his face. If I hadn't noticed his change of clothes I would have thought that his twenty-four hour absence was a dream.

"You left me," I accused.

"I'll never leave you for that long again." He reached out to stroke my face with an impossibly gentle touch. "When I returned last night you were already asleep."

"You should have woken me up! I waited for you for hours."

"Bella, I keep you awake too much as it is." His tone was chiding, but I saw a gleam in his eyes hinting that another emotion might be lurking beneath his jovial exterior.

"Bella, please accept my apology. So often I think too much. As a vampire your mind never stops, except for a few instances that I am just now learning about. I'm not used to thinking with my heart, or whatever rules my emotions these days. And I certainly don't trust my emotions like I am finding I should. I over-thought yesterday, and only realized late last night that it was ridiculous."

"Ridiculous? Ridiculous to try to get out of wedding planning with Alice?" I hedged.

"That's not exactly why I left."

I waited, blushing. I wanted to hear this from Edward, unprompted.

"Bella, at first I wanted some space to consider your request from the other night. You might not understand this, but I can think much more clearly when you're not around."

Actually, I understood that all too well.

Edward seemed at a loss for words and started again, "I'm afraid I've been unnecessarily chaste. I am serious in that I want to preserve our virtue until after the wedding. I cannot compromise that, those are my morals, I suppose. I want to keep you safe, but in matters as innocuous as bedroom activities, I may have gone overboard. I tend to do that, you know. You should know this about me since you're going to be my wife."

With the words 'my wife', his eyes melted into soft pools of molten butterscotch and he bent his head in my direction, and gently kissed my cheek.

Edward continued rapidly as was his habit when he was excited, "Bella, I would say no if I had any doubt that you were supposed to be mine. If I had to go by reason alone, there is a good chance I would say no. But my dear, I can't say no with regard to our destiny. For that reason, I say yes to your request, to a point of course. And I can't tell you what that point is just yet. I'll know when I get there. Does that sound fair to you?"

I responded by flinging my arms around Edward's chest, ducking my head into the space under his chin. "Thank you," I smiled.

"No, thank you, for putting up with me." His arms encircled me right back. He kissed the top of my head, and his hands felt like lightening as they gently traced a line along my spine from my neck to my waist and back. I pressed myself more firmly against him, and lightly kissed the cold hollow of his neck. Edward tensed, and I was immediately deflated.

"I thought things were going to be different?" I asked, frustration and disappointment bleeding into one another.

"Bella, Charlie is waiting for you downstairs, a bit impatiently. He's considering waking you."

"But it's Saturday! He should have left for fishing hours ago."

"On the contrary, he's planning quite the breakfast spread."

I cringed. "What's the occasion?" I asked suspiciously.

"Charlie called me this morning to ask me over for brunch. I get the feeling he wants to make peace, of sorts."

"He didn't!" Oh, this would be awkward.

"He did. I should be arriving in about a half an hour. You should get ready if you want to look presentable for your fiancé." He chuckled, playing with my wild hair. Fiancé was a word that would take me some time to get used to. Also on the list were the words: wife, marriage and wedding. My nerves were suddenly tensed at the thought of Charlie, Edward and I sitting around our kitchen table using all of those loaded terms together, in a casual conversation.

"I should give you some privacy to get dressed, and perhaps some time to help Charlie in the kitchen." Edward seemed slightly bemused.

I pulled myself up reluctantly. "Will you be on time?" I asked. I certainly didn't want Edward to leave, even for just half an hour. After his absence yesterday, I needed to get my fill.

"My car is around the corner, so I'll hardly be leaving the property."

I sighed, "O.K."

He lips brushed against mine, as light as butterfly wings, and then he kissed the top of my head, and before I could turn around he was out the window.

I chose a blue sundress Alice had recently purchased for me, and then quickly topped it with a white cardigan sweater. Glancing glumly out at the gray morning I thought that Forks in July must feel like mild winter in the rest of the northern hemisphere. I took my bag of toiletries to the bathroom to see what could be done about my appearance. I gave up on my hair and twisted it into a loose bun at the back of my neck. There was no denying Edward's return had had a positive effect on my face. My cheeks were pink and my eyes were bright.

I ran down the stairs to try to intercept Charlie before he could do too much damage. I was too late. Smoke blackened the air throughout the first floor and a can of fruit cocktail was laying half opened on the counter. On the table, a plate held a stack of blackened round briquettes, possibly pancakes.

"Dad, what are you doing?" I asked through coughs, as I swatted at the smoke, trying to clear the air around me.

Charlie turned toward me, a slightly sheepish look on his face. "Well honey, I'm making us some breakfast."

There was a light rap on the front door.

"That must be him." Charlie said with an edge of malice in his voice.

"Char-dad, what is all of this?

"Bella, there are some things that I need to say to you, and to Edward," he choked out Edward's name.

"Dad, I've made my decision. There is nothing you can say." I turned to get the door, looking forward to having Edward's presence for support, but Charlie stopped me in my tracks.

"No Bella, I would like to talk to Edward, man to man."

"Oh dad!" I groaned, "Don't – "

"Bella, this is something I have to do as your father." With that Charlie strode toward the door with an air of determination that I had only had the opportunity to see him use on the few occasions I'd watched him make an arrest or handle prisoners in Fork's small jail. It was not a good sign.

I set the table without thinking. The house was small, and it was easy to hear Charlie and Edward talking on the landing.

"Edward."

"Good morning, Charlie."

"Edward, before we eat, there's something I need to say."

Charlie paused, perhaps expecting some protest. After an awkward silence, one that was even painfully evident from the kitchen, he started in, "I'm just going to say this once. If you ever leave her again, God help me, I'll kill you. Maybe one day you'll have a daughter and then you will understand what it did to me to see Bella that way. It was the worst thing I have ever had to live through, and it haunts me to this day."

"Charlie, that was a mistake that I'll have to live with for the rest of my existence. It is a mistake that I would never make twice. You have my word that I will never leave Bella again, unless she asks me to."

"I hope you're not doing this in some attempt to make things up to her." I was impressed by the edge in Charlie's voice. If Edward were any other teenaged boy, I'm sure he would be quaking in his shoes.

"Marriage is not a word I take lightly, Charlie. I was raised to consider marriage as something that lasts forever, and that is what I intend."

"Edward, I notice you throw around that word 'forever' a lot around Bella. It may be a dreamy idea to a kid like you, but you're talking about life son, a long time."

Edward's voice was instantly grave, "Charlie, when I say forever, it is not lightly."

"Huh, well, alright. I guess that's all I had to say. You're a good kid, Edward. Bells could do a lot worse. I wasn't exactly clear the other day; you have my blessing. Please, she's my only daughter, keep her safe for me, from now on."

I walked to the front door in time to see Edward smile easily at Charlie, so easily I was surprised. "Always."

I beamed at Edward and as he looked up at me, and his smile turned radiant.

"Who wants pancakes?" My voice sounded silly after the solemnity of their conversation.

I opened the door to let everyone inside, and Edward practically leaped past Charlie to get to me. He lifted me off of my feet and pulled me into an enormous hug, nearly squeezing the breath out of me. I wound my arms around his neck and sighed. I felt so safe and secure in his arms, these arms that would keep me forever.

"I _will_ keep you safe, forever," he whispered in my ear, too quietly for Charlie to hear.

I turned my head and kissed his lips forcefully enough that it was Edward that caught his breath this time. But instead of pulling away, he tightened his grip and pulled me in closer.

Behind us, someone coughed. I had forgotten about Charlie. I didn't think vampires forgot anything, but Edward seemed as though Charlie's presence were a surprise to him as well. We let each other go, my face burning, and Edward sporting a sheepish grin. But he made sure to hold my hand in his, and bent to whisper in my ear once more as we walked into the house. "Just wait until we're alone."

I wasn't used to this kind of talk from him, and my legs gave out a bit. But Edward helped me along to the kitchen and into a chair, strangely reminiscent of Alice's visit yesterday.

But the phone rang before Charlie could sit down.

"Billy, hey, what's up? Are we still on for this afternoon?" My stomach was immediately in knots and I was glad I was sitting. Any mention of Billy was still too close to Jake.

"Of course I can head over to your place, but I've got the bigger T.V. you know."

"No ride? He could be back by then, it's not 'til one."

There was silence in the kitchen as Charlie listened to Billy on the other end of the line. My stomach continued to lurch in uneasy somersaults. I looked at Edward. It was clear that he could hear Billy's end of the conversation quite clearly over the phone. Gone was all trace of happiness; his face was blank, his eyes were unfocused and his hands fell to his sides.

"Billy, I'll be right over. No Billy, I'm coming over. I'll call the station, get a squad car out there."

There was another short pause. Edward flinched at something I couldn't hear Billy say.

"Goddammit Billy, you can't stop me from coming over. I'm not just your friend; this is my job!" He slammed the phone down and swore under his breath.

By this time the blood had drained from my face and tears were welling in my eyes.

"Jake ran away." But Charlie didn't have to say it. I already knew. I had driven my friend from his home, from his family.

"When?" I choked.

"Yesterday, around dinner time."

The bottom fell out of my stomach, and I grabbed the edge of the table as a cold sweat broke out on my forehead. This was my fault. I didn't look up.

"What happened?" My voice was shaky, and I sucked in some air.

"Billy wouldn't say much. I'm going over there now. It doesn't make sense. Kid's been gone all night. Billy never called it in. Says he needs his space. He's sixteen, the kid needs a home, not space."

Charlie strode to the door, pulling his jacket on, getting ready to leave.

"I should come dad. This is all my fault."

Charlie's look hurt more than the pain I was already in. There was stony accusation in his glance. "Bella, that's not a good idea. Not now."

It was too much. I let my head fall into my hands, tears streamed freely into my palms as I cried silently for my friend. I felt Edward's cold arm wind around me, and he pressed his face into my hair.

"Bells," Charlie's voice was apologetic, "stay with Edward while I go handle Billy. I'll be back soon. I know this is hard on you, but Billy's his dad. He needs me and I've got to get over there so we can get him back, for all of us."

I kept my head buried until I heard the front door click and the cruiser's engine roar to life.

When I was sure Charlie was gone, I lifted my face to meet Edward's concerned glance. "This is all my fault," I croaked.

The pain in Edward's eyes was unmistakable and mirrored my feelings perfectly. "Bella, I have more of a hand in this than you. I broke your rule."

I didn't understand what he was saying at all. I pulled back from his embrace waiting for him to continue.

"I sent Jake an invitation." Edward held my gaze, clearly apologetic.

It was like being punched in the stomach. I couldn't find my breath. It took several seconds to remember how to breathe. "You what?"

"Bella, I knew the wedding would be incomplete for you without your best friend there."

"But what about Jake's feelings?"

"Bella, if it were me, I would want the opportunity to be there. I would want the choice to either support you in your happiest hour, or to object if I chose."

"You thought Jake might object. Why would you want that?"

"I know his is the only objection that might hold any sway with you. The way you cried that night, well it was the most hurt I've seen you since . . . I want to make sure, for all of us, that you've chosen correctly."

"I already made my choice." My sorrow was tinged with anger.

"I know that now, better than I did yesterday."

"I can't believe you would invite that kind of drama to our wedding."

Edward grabbed both of my hands in his. A series of emotions played across his face, ending with contrition. "I'm sorry Bella. Please, I'm so sorry."

I fell into his granite arms, but the tears wouldn't come anymore. He let me lay like that for a long time.

Over the next day and a half our house and the police station became the two headquarters for mobilization to find Jacob Black. People streamed in and out at all hours, posters were designed and distributed, and search parties were assembled. I kept a large pot of coffee at hand, and food ready for when people came in from the woods after a long search. I thought it might be similar to when I went missing, and felt bad knowing that the pain I felt for my friend was similar to the pain I had caused Charlie that night long ago.

There were two distinct differences. The Quileutes were not here to help this time. They knew no one would spot the boy on the missing posters. The other difference was that Edward was by my side the entire time. Touching me the entire time. Always willing to help in any way possible, even though he knew as well as the Quileutes that it was a lost cause.

Charlie worked tirelessly without sleep that first night. He spearheaded the search, and had sheriff's departments all along the coast, and throughout the peninsula, on the lookout for Jacob. I loved him so much more watching the concern he showed for Jake, and understood a little better his love for me. And I watched how Charlie compartmentalized the guilt in this situation. I don't know if Billy told him about the wedding invitation, but Charlie easily shifted the blame to Edward on this count, something Edward was not going to argue about.

While it would have been easiest to jump on Charlie's bandwagon and blame Edward, I felt much more deeply responsible myself. Edward had given Jacob the chance he would have wanted. Even though he broke my rule, he proved himself to be a better person than I would have been in the same situation. At worst, I considered Jake's disappearance something Edward and I had done together, and I wasn't happy to have this as our first joint accomplishment.

After the first twenty-four hours passed with no news of Jacob's whereabouts, the action began to focus more intensely around the police station. Alice flitted in and out, checking on Edward and I, seeming a bit distracted. Finally, after close to thirty-six hours, Charlie came home to sleep. I fed him and hugged him and he trudged up the stairs without a word. I was exhausted, but I was glad things had settled down. I needed time to process all of this, but decided to wait until later. I knew Edward would be waiting in my room, and this was the first night we would be alone together since he had agreed to the terms of my deal.


	8. Italy

Alice was right about the first plane, no delays. But our connecting flight to Italy was canceled and we were forced to wait overnight in the airport bar. Jasper placed a call to Carlisle, who had tried to reach us while we were on route to Florida. Unfortunately it didn't appear that Jasper's usual gifts carried over cellular airwaves. Rose and I could clearly hear the tone of disapproval in Carlisle's voice.

"We tend to make decisions like this together, Jasper. We are a family."

"I didn't want to get the family involved. This is something I feel I have to do. We don't need to all run off to fix each other's problems. We're adults."

"It seems you three are acting more like adolescents than I ever would have expected."

"Carlisle, Alice doesn't see any danger ahead for us. This is a friendly gesture. We'll be back in no time. Please, just go about your business and don't worry about us."

There was a pause before Carlisle continued. "Please send my regards to Peter and Charlotte, and keep in touch. I want to know you are safe."

When we finally arrived in Rome I was ready to get going already. The sooner this was done, the better. But we flew in at night and Rose had an easy time convincing me to get a hotel room until morning. Jasper seemed a bit impatient with the arrangement, but he didn't have much of a choice. And I knew his time would be spent figuring out strategies for approaching Volterra and confronting the guard. So I figured this night might work out for all of us.

It was nearing noon the next day as we approached Volterra. From everything we knew our presence alone would be enough to alert the Volturi to our arrival. Walking into the city, we stayed close to the walls, keeping ourselves in shadow.

The streets were mostly empty except for a few tourists taking pictures of towers and turrets. But within minutes I noticed a dark figure flitting from one rooftop to another. Then two hooded figures appeared on the far wall and were quickly gone. We stopped and turned our backs to the wall. From the far side of the courtyard, the same two hooded figures from the wall walked fluidly toward us, at a slow and steady pace. Both were tall and broad, but I had them beat in the muscle department. They stopped about five paces from us and I heard a hiss escape from Rose's lips.

"Abbiamo visitatori." One of the guards started. He was slightly taller than the other, with a dark olive undertone to his chalky skin. I could see his black hair falling in ringlets to his shoulders underneath his black cape.

"Lei parlate italiano? No? Di dove e?"

Well, this was awkward. I hadn't even thought about a language barrier. Of course Carlisle and Edward had no problem with Italian, but the three of us weren't necessarily the bookish type. I ran through some textbook Spanish in my head, but none of it seemed even slightly relevant, even if I could make it understood in Italian. All three of us continued stare at the guards, our backs to the wall.

I used this time to size them up. They were big, sure, but I was bigger than both of them. The one that spoke first was the taller of the two. The other guard was broader, giving him a slightly stocky appearance. He pulled the hood from his head, revealing a thin aquiline nose and a strong jaw. His dark blond hair was pulled severely into a ponytail.

They didn't seem hostile, just curious and definitely all business. Both pairs of eyes were the same bright red color, and were constantly flitting between the three of us. We stared back, and I instinctively started to crouch. But suddenly I began to feel safe and welcome and I stood upright. Jasper.

"We're Americans." I tried.

The two guards had relaxed their stance a bit as well. They seemed almost welcoming now that Jasper had used his magic on them. "Ah, Americani! With so much going on in America, what brings you here, American relations?" It was the same tall, dark and handsome guard that spoke to us first in Italian. Thank goodness he spoke English too.

"We have a message for Aro." Jasper said calmly.

The guards' eyebrows arched in surprise. "And all our American visitors ask to speak with Aro. We'll need your names, of course. Aro will let you know if he wishes to see you."

"I'm Emmett Cullen, this is my brother Jasper, and my mate, Rosalie." I said simply.

"Il famoso Cullens? The famous Cullens?" He needlessly repeated himself in English.

I wasn't sure how to answer that one. I didn't think I would do well to say, "Well, no, you might be thinking of the other half of my family, they're the famous ones. We're just the ones they could spare for a while."

But then Rose perked up. "Famous, huh?" They looked at her as she spoke, and it was like the guards really saw her for the first time. It wasn't Rose's fault, all men look at her like that. They seemed to drink in her face, and continued to let their gaze drift down over her tank top, skinny jeans and high-heeled sandals. Rose, very aware of the attention, shook out her blond hair and smiled. The taller guard smiled back, but the more aloof of the two composed himself quickly. I tried not to let this get to me. Like Alice said, this was a peace mission.

"I believe Aro will know which Cullens we are." I stated, trying to bring the attention back to where it belonged.

The guards exchanged a glance and the taller of the two spoke again. "If you are Cullens, I believe you should come with us. The council will be pleased to see you, you have been in their thoughts."

The shorter was clearly the superior officer and stopped the talkative one with just a glance. The talkative one moved to our left barking "Andiamo! Subito!" The other guard closed in to our right and started toward us, suddenly close enough for me to strike. Instinctively, Rose and I snarled, ready to fight. But Jasper grabbed our arms. "Guys, they're herding us, not fighting us."

This was going to be harder than I thought. Keeping my guard up, but my fists down.

We walked in the shadows, away from the town square. I held Rose's hand, Jasper walked in front of us, and there was one guard in front and one behind. After turning off a broad avenue, we continued down a narrow ally that sloped slightly downward, with water running in an open gutter along the side of the road. Our footsteps echoed against the walls, announcing or arrival to anyone that might be listening. I felt Rose subtly squeeze my hand and I looked over at her. Very quickly she winked, shook off my hand and started trailing behind me to walk with the talkative guard.

"My name's Rose, what's yours?" She tried.

I could hear the smile on the guard's voice without turning to look. "Signora, I'm Valentino. It's my pleasure to meet you. No one mentioned such a lovely presence in la famiglia di Cullen." This sleaze ball was making me a little sick, but I knew Rose had a plan. So did Jasper apparently, he turned and winked at me too. Maybe we couldn't read minds and tell the future like Edward and Alice, but hey, we could wink. Instantly, I felt a bit giddy and talkative. OK, Jasper could do more than wink.

"You all talk about us Cullens?" Rose's accent was suddenly game show-American, and her mannerisms were all innocently beguiling.

"The council comes to life when your family is mentioned. A most remarkable coven."

"Whatever do you mean?"

"Your diet is so strange. And then your brother came only a few months ago, making himself quite the spectacle. We all thought he had lost his mind, but his gift spared him. And the idea of adopting a human! No one but the Volturi has ever gotten away with such a stunt. But then, your sister's gift saved you that time. La vostra famiglia e pazzo, ma i pui fortunati."

"Hee, hee." Rose's laugh was the light tinkling of bells, echoing through the alley. "That was so pretty, how would you say that in English?"

"Your family is very lucky and, how do you say it . . . they do you no justice." There was a loaded silence and I could just imagine how Valentino must be looking at Rose.

"Our Jane has just come back with word of your latest misadventure. There is nessun altro famigliare beside the Volturi that could survive those odds, newborn vampires or not. How did you do it? That is what we want to know."

"Who wants to know?" Rose tried.

Valentino was excited, and his English was losing out to Italian, "Tutti noi! All of us, especially the council. Aro is curious. And Caius is angry. Jane has their ear. Before you were pazzo, then dotato…um gifted, ma adesso e una minaccia, a menace."

"How silly! But we're no menace! We only want to be left alone!"

"Then why are you here?"

"You must have an idea?"

"Il tuo animale umano? About your human pet?" I knew Rose must have been smiling about this new nickname for Bella. But smiling or not, Rose didn't answer. I knew she liked this attention, but she wasn't giving Bella away for it.

"Mmm, si, it must be. Aro will be so pleased to see you. I am very pleased to make your acquaintance as well." Valentino's voice had fazed from excited to husky in an instant. "You are la donna pui bella che ho visto."

I turned to see Valentino slip his arm around Rose's waist. That was all I could take. I swung around and a deep growl escaped from my throat. Immediately, Valentino launched himself toward me, his teeth glimmering in the weak light of the alley. But then, from behind me, I felt someone strike me, throwing me sideways and out of Valentino's way. I hit the wall of the alley, bricks crumbing to the pavement on impact. I was quickly up and ready to charge. But Jasper stood between us.

"May I remind you Emmett, that this is not why we are here. Please, we must see Aro."

Again, calm washed over me. Jasper was going to have to work overtime on this trip. Why was I constantly riled up?

"Excuse me, but Rose is with me." I growled in Valentino's direction.

"Si, signore Cullen. My apologies, I mean no offense." But the distain in voice and his eyes was evident.

"Silence everyone! We must continue. They will be expecting us." I was surprised to here the shorter guard speak for the first time. He didn't even turn in our direction, but continued toward what appeared to be the end of the alley. Valentino again took his place behind us. Rose, Jasper and I all walked abreast of one another now, tense and on guard. I took Rose's hand and she smiled at me warmly, but with a hint of reproach. The guard in front slipped his hand over one of the bricks, 10th from the top, 113th from the left, and the grate at his feet slid open.

"Cullens first." He said, gesturing for us to enter. Jasper stepped forward, Rose followed, and I took up the rear. I fell about 60 feet, and landed on another grate. Water from the gutter in the street flowed down the damp stone walls, continuing through the grating below us. We were in a small stone enclosure with a low ceiling. The air was damp and pungent. Valentino and the other guard followed. Again the first guard moved his hand over a place in the wall, and a doorway materialized. We moved through a passageway with a low arched ceiling, all of us stooping, but only my shoulders brushing the walls on either side.

As we walked through a long series of passageways, I worked to keep my mind on the task at hand. They wanted to kill Bella, and I was here to save her life. I knew what Valentino wanted and it wasn't in the same league. But I was shaken out of my reverie as we walked through a large set of wooden doors and saw three ancient vampires seated on wooden thrones. I recognized them from the picture in Carlisle's office: Aro, Marcus and Caius. A small vampire was facing them. I would know her anywhere. It was Jane.

"Jane, that is for us to decide," Aro was saying.

"But Aro, the situation requires action." Cauis countered.

But all four turned to the doorway as we entered. The shorter guard spoke to the council. "We found these three within the city limits on our patrol. They asked for you Aro, by name." The silence and stillness in the room was immediate.

Aro's face first registered shock at our appearance, but quickly rearranged itself into a look of too-sweet welcome. Caius and Marcus wore expressions of disdain and boredom respectively. "Well, well, it seems the Cullens are as drawn to us as we are to them these days. I feel I already know all of you, after Edward's thoughts and Alice's visions. Of course it is no substitute for having you here in the flesh. And I must say, it is most fortuitous for us, as we were just discussing your family. I only wish the entire family could have made the trip."

I wasn't sure what to say in reply to his formal, accented English monologue. Jazz and Rose must have felt the same, because we all kept quiet. But we were keenly aware that many more vampires had filtered into the room during Aro's speech. The walls were now lined with members of the guard.

"While there is much we might like to ask, you must have come here on a purpose of your own." Aro continued.

I felt Jasper's brand of calm confidence wash over the room and then I stepped forward. This is what we were here for. "Yes, we've come with an invitation. Edward and Bella are getting married later this summer. We wanted to invite you to the wedding to show we still plan on keeping our part of the bargain. Edward has agreed to turn Bella after they are married." From what I understood, there was a little more to the bargain than that. But it was really none of Aro's business.

"My, my. This is a timely message. Jane here has just informed us about Bella's current condition. Some among us feel Bella's time may be up." Caius sneered openly.

"Alice told me that she sees Bella turning before the year is over."

"I have no doubt she did, you speak in earnest. I will have to check, just the same. Please tell me though, why are you three the Cullen emissaries? I would expect it more appropriate if Edward and Bella came. This is not your business, not your concern."

"Edward and Bella are happy, and this wedding is very important to them and their families. This was something we could do for them."

"You are a curious coven indeed. I don't understand your motivations, your own self-interest so intertwined with the fate of others. But before we can get to that, perhaps you can solve another riddle that has plagued those among us recently."

I looked to Jasper and Rose. They seemed as perplexed as I was. Alice had said nothing about a riddle.

"We would like to hear how your family managed to survive the recent attack, with no casualties. Clearly Alice and Edward are assets, but they are defensive weapons. How were you able to defend yourselves and kill off twenty vampires?"

Jasper stepped forward, "I have military experience, sir." With Jasper's past he had respect for the law. It showed in the formality of his speech.

"Ah, yes, Jasper. Your past is no secret here. But even a great tactician needs an army. And seven peace-loving vampires do not add up to an army."

"We were prepared, sir. Alice told us they were coming, and we trained."

I could tell by the look on Aro's face that he was becoming impatient. "Perhaps you are not as adroit with the English language as your brother. We all have our strengths. Emmett, if you don't mind, I would like to see for myself how this battle was won." With that, Aro extended his hand in my direction, but I knew he wasn't looking to shake. Well, I knew this would be coming. So I stepped forward and let my palm rest lightly on top of his.

Aro's countenance immediately smoothed, as he saw my family's history from my point of view. I watched his face closely, trying to tease out emotions or other thoughts, but Aro remained inscrutable. Finally he opened his eyes and let his hand drop from underneath mine. "Hmm, interesting. You are sincere, the invitation is genuine, and Alice did indeed tell you about her vision of Bella's future."

It seemed settled. Thank god, I wanted out of this freak show.

Aro continued, "And I can see from your last battle that your fighting skills are impressive. But I'm afraid maybe you are confused, or unsure yourself, because the battle is incomplete when I read your thoughts. It is as if I can only see half of what transpired."

I guess Aro's skills weren't as impressive as I had imagined. It was clear enough to me how we won that one.

Aro turned to Rose. "You, please step up." Rose glanced suspiciously at me and I nodded and motioned for her to come stand at my side. I took her hand in mine, and she gave her other hand to Aro. He took it, more impatient this time. He held it for just three seconds and let it drop.

"Do any of you know how you won that fight?" He was a bit exasperated now. I wasn't sure what he was seeing and what he wasn't.

He turned to face the rest of the council and Jane, "What Emmett says on the matter of Bella is true, Jane. Their coven plans to turn Bella after the wedding. Their intentions are honorable; they plan to uphold the law." And then he turned to smile somewhat menacingly back to me. "In any event, Edward may do our job for us, Jane. He has some interesting ideas for his bride, reserved for after the wedding. It may leave Bella a little worse for the wear."

Jane snickered, and then from across the room I heard Valentino laugh out loud. "Ha, ha, una sciattona, another little vampire whore."

That was it. "No one talks about my sister that way!"

I was across the room in an instant, my hands around Valentino's throat, driving him into the wall. Out of the corner of my eyes I saw two guards rush toward me from either side. I quickly caught the one to my right, punching him squarely in the face with my fist, sending his body crashing into the wall of the tower. I grabbed the other guard by his long hair and swung him toward the line of thrones, scattering the council, and creating a pile of splintered wood. Before anyone could act, I reached down picked Valentine up by the neck, twisting his head at a precarious angle. Then grabbing his shoulder in my other hand, I twisted his body in the opposite direction, easily severing his head from his body.

It had been less than three seconds. I dropped the head and the body and turned my back to the wall, growling, crouching; waiting for the next advance. I searched the room for Rose and Jasper, only to see that the remaining guards now surrounded them. Their faces clearly conveyed disappointment and alarm. Damn. Alice said this wasn't a fight, but it was now.

Jane stepped into my line of vision, enraged and amused all at once. Her right arm was extended towards me. I lunged for the tiny vampire, hoping to tackle her before her electric charge could reach me. But in mid-flight pain suddenly shot through my body. This was worse than anything I had felt before, worse than when I was mauled by the bear; worse than when I became a vampire. Jane casually stepped out my trajectory, and unable to control my limbs, my body fell uselessly to the floor. I felt as if I were exploding on the cold stone, each cell bursting, each nerve ending digging daggers into my body.

I could hear Rose in the background. "Emmett, no! Stop it you bitch! Someone stop her." There was scuffling. I hoped Jasper and Rose didn't do anything stupid, like I had. They were no match for twenty Volturi guards.

Just when I thought I couldn't take any more, the pain intensified. I could no longer hold back, and a loud guttural yell escaped my lips, surprising even me, and shaking the floor.

"No!" It was Rose again. The pain in her voice matched what I felt in my bones.

Then, a simple, yet imperious command, "Enough."

In an instant the pain was gone and I was on my feet, ready to pounce. I spotted Jane ten feet away, smirking wickedly in my direction and completely unconcerned by my proximity. A snarl escaped from my throat, but before I took a step I heard it again.

"Enough." The voice was quiet, yet with an unmistakable authority born over thousands of years of command. I stopped and looked in the direction of the voice. It was Marcus, a look of disinterest on his parchment-like face.

"Thank you Marcus. Now Jane, would you please stand back." Aro continued, as if nothing had happened. Jane glided back toward the platform where the thrones had been. "Emmett, please rejoin your party."

I strode across the room, and the guard opened around Rose and Jasper to let me through. Rose fell into my arms. "This is all wrong. Alice said no fighting." She whispered. The guard closed back around the three of us.

I pulled Rose closer, burying her head into my chest. I had ruined this for us, for all of us. I looked at the twenty guards surrounding us, all poised for the kill, with Valentino still in an unmoving pile on the floor. This would be over quickly. What would they do to the rest of our family? I would never know.

"A very curious coven indeed. Your bond with each other surpasses anything I have ever seen. And here I thought your brother was the only anomaly among you with his fierce love for a human. Now I see he is not alone. I am not sure if it is an asset or a weakness, but we will see in time. I am impressed with your ability, Emmett. Jasper has trained you well. Not many could get past three guardsmen before Jane can raise her hand."

"But I am afraid that we may have a bit of a problem. You have come here and picked a fight with one of the guard. While your family has plans for Bella's future, she lives as a human still." Caius and Marcus were suddenly on either side of Aro, each touching one of his hands. Aro looked at Caius and shook his head just slightly. "No, too much of a waste." Caius' mouth twisted into a sneer.

Again, Aro continued as if there had been no interruption. "We may let this go. But we need something in return. Some way to physically show your allegiance, something more than words."

"Your terms?" Jasper stepped out in front of Rose and I.

Aro looked toward Caius and Marcus. Marcus nodded once, but Caius glared at him and walked away. "We have been presented with a small problem in Saudi Arabia. Word has reached us about the creation of a small newborn army. Obviously, this is something that we would usually see to. However, it seems we are not the only ones equipped to handle such uprisings."

"If you three Cullens help us with this situation, perhaps we will overlook your indiscretions here, and give little Bella some leeway. I think we might let her live until the end of the year."

"The alternative?" Jasper asked.

"I'm afraid we would have to hammer that out between my family and yours. Caius was at Aro's side again, touching his hand. Marcus looked intently at the three of us, showing passing interest. But it was the looks on the faces of Jane and the guards that sealed the deal for me. The alternative would not be pleasant.

"Perhaps you need time to decide?" Aro asked. "That seems fair. A contingent is leaving tomorrow to visit our desert friends. I can give you the night to think about it."

Jasper glanced at Rose and I. I didn't need the night, I was ready to go, but Rose held my arm in a deathly grip and I knew she wasn't convinced. "We don't need all night. Can you give us five minutes?" I asked. Rose gripped my arm tighter.

"Please bring our guests to a private suite." Aro commanded.

It was then that I heard Jasper's cell phone ringing. He didn't pick up. Both my phone and Rose's started to ring then too. It would be Alice; I had certainly changed things. She should have just sent Edward and Carlisle, none of this would have happened. They would have been on their way home by now.

We were escorted to a small circular room with walls and flooring made of some type of re-enforced steel. There were no windows, and only one door. A light rain was falling to the floor. Looking up I saw that the walls extended upwards indefinitely, and there was no ceiling. We were in the bottom of a steel well.

Without speaking to each other we each took out our cell phone. Jasper was the first on the line. "Alice, is it a trap?"

"I said no fighting!" There was pain in Alice's voice.

I took the phone from Jasper, "The guy had it coming, Alice. He was flirting with Rose, and did you see what he said about Bella?"

"Emmett, please pass the phone back to Jasper."

"Jazz, you were supposed to stop this kind of thing from happening." I could hear the defeat in Alice's voice. Now the famous Cullens would have to fly in and save us.

"Alice, just tell me, is it a trap? Can we do this?"

"Well, no, and yes, maybe." Alice pronounced ambiguously. "There _is_ a budding vampire army. You guys can take them. But the Vultouri will be watching the whole time. I think they are curious."

"Yes, they're interested in our fight. They clearly thought Jane would find a different scene when she turned up in Forks. They didn't think we would all survive. Aro listened in to our thoughts, but it seems like he couldn't see the werewolves."

The werewolves, of course! That's why Aro couldn't see the entire fight. Just like Alice couldn't see them in the future, Aro couldn't hear them in our thoughts.

"Well, let's just go and tell him. Thanks Alice, perfect." I shouted toward the phone.

"Not that quick Emmett! We owe the wolves, we shouldn't put them in danger." Alice countered.

"OK, I'm doing this for Bella and Edward, and now you want me to do this for the wolves too. You're crazy." It was Rose. She was fuming.

"Rose, it won't make a difference. You've made a few enemies in there. They're not letting you guys off easy, wolves or not. Why give away our one secret if it's not going to make a difference?"

"Maybe to get rid of the stinking wolves." Rose snarled.

"Rose, let's just concentrate on the fight at hand." Jasper admonished. "So Alice, we can win?"

"Yes, quite easily."

"Well, let's do it then, get this over with." I looked around. Jasper was visibly calmer after speaking with Alice. Funny, she seemed to be soothing him now. Rose was dejected, this was clearly not her idea of a good time.

"This is all too much. We've done enough. Do any of you think that all this means that maybe Bella and Edward aren't meant to be? Maybe we just wipe our hands and walk away."

"I don't think so, Rose. But I love you, and if you turned around and walked away now, I would follow you. But I think we have to do this. I don't think we have a choice; they're not going to just let me go. I'm so sorry."

"No, Emm, what's done is done." Rose put her arms around my waste. "I'm with you. Let's show them what we can do."

"Alright, let's go find out what they want from us." Jasper turned to the doors.

"Wait, Jazz." Alice's voice was suddenly anxious on the other end of the cell phone.

"Alice?"

"Jazz, do you love me?"

"Of course."

"You're coming back to me?"

"Alice, what's the matter? You know me –"

"Jazz, please, there isn't time. I just need to hear you say it."

"You know I will always come back to you. I'm yours."

"Jazz, there's going to be this vampire-"

"Time's up, people." The doors opened and the guards were waiting.

"Jazz, I love you."

"Cell phones off in the tower room, please."

"I love you Alice."

There were only a few in attendance in the main room now. Aro, Marcus and Caius were at the center of the room. They were flanked by Jane and Alec on one side, and Valentino, looking a bit shaken, on the other.

"Aro, we've decided; we'll do it. We have nothing to hide, we want the best for our family and for yours."

"Excellent. Your plane will be ready tomorrow. Jane, Felix and Valentino will accompany you. This mission, like all of the Volturi's activities, is confidential. Your cell phones will remain in our possession. You will get them back upon successful completion of your mission. I know that the peculiar talents of your siblings will make complete secrecy somewhat impossible. However, you cannot speak of your activities to anyone else for fifty years. Those are the terms, they are non-negotiable."

We nodded in agreement; there was really no decision.

"Jane, please get our friends ready for Rub' al Khali."


	9. Temperature

It seemed like forever since Edward and I had had our discussion, but finally here we both were, alone in my bedroom, Charlie safely sound asleep. Edward gazed at me from across the room, unmoving, not breathing. I realized that I wasn't breathing either and took a deep conscious breath. Were we just going to look at each other then? That hardly seemed like a step in the right direction.

I commanded my feet to move, and was startled as I walked quite calmly to where Edward was standing. My proximity seemed to bring him back to life, and he reached for my hands, and then very gently held them both in his. "Bella, should we wait? Should I leave? Jacob -"

"No, please," I pleaded quietly. Edward placed a light kiss on my lips, like it was a question, and then pulled back to judge its effect. I reached up to hold his jaw in my hands and pulled my lips to his as a reply.

Without wasting more time on words, Edward began lightly kissing below my ear lobe, making his way with his lips slowly down my neck and across my shoulder. He paused just long enough for me to take a ragged breath, and then gently pushed the strap of my tank top off of my shoulder, in order to continue kissing. He swiftly pushed the other strap down, now holding both of my bare shoulders in his cold hands, and staring deeply into my eyes. So many emotions swam across the surface of his amber eyes. I involuntarily gulped and goose bumps ran down both of my arms. Edward quickly shifted his hands from my shoulders to my waist, accidentally brushing my breasts very lightly with his icy hands.

Wait, vampires didn't do anything by accident. Lightening shot like burning ice through my limbs and my breath caught in my throat. But before I could respond, Edward pulled away and was suddenly sitting on the edge of my bed, next to where I was standing. He took a deep breath, and I could smell the sweetness of his scent as he exhaled. His smell always made me a little dizzy, so I took a seat on the bed by his side, more to avoid falling, than from any scheming on my part. I was resigned that this was far as we would get tonight.

But instead of the disapproval and discouragement I expected, Edward smiled crookedly. "I think you mentioned something about my shirt the other night," he murmured, brushing my hair behind my ear and burning my cheeks with his touch.

"Yes." I immediately began struggling with the buttons of his white linen shirt. My lips instinctively searched out his mouth and our kisses were hard as our lips parted and I felt his cold tongue meet mine for the first time. There is no way my fingers could work properly now, and they twisted ineffectually at the top of his neckline as my heart sputtered irregularly in my chest.

Edward quickly clasped my wrists in his cold grip and brought my hands down to his waist. It must have been too much too quickly and I was expecting him to pull away again. But Edward's kisses were still so strong, and before I knew it his hands were at his collar, pulling his shirt open, and shrugging it off with a seamless movement. Buttons ricocheted around the room like small sparks and I felt his cold hard body pressing carefully against mine.

I pulled away just enough to speak with my lips brushing his.

"Are my kisses safe enough?" I asked breathlessly.

"Hmmm," his answer was a sigh.

I carefully began kissing Edward's neck, and then let my lips linger on his chest as my hands hungrily explored his chiseled physique. Without thinking, I climbed onto the bed behind him. I started placing kisses lightly on the back of his neck and his shoulders as I pulled my arms around him, reaching toward his chest, holding myself to him closely. Edward was completely still, only his breath stirring the air. I paused to take a deep breath and pulled away just slightly. With a quick and unusually graceful move I pulled my own tank top over my head and threw it on the floor so that it landed on top of Edward's. He must have known what happened, but he didn't move.

I put my hands around him again, but then ducked underneath his arm so we are facing each other. Edward's gaze was fixed completely on my eyes. Again, the emotions there were too complex to fathom, and I was still cautious. Did I go too far?

But then Edward's face slowly moved in toward mine, not averting his glance for a second. Before I knew it he was kissing my lips, my neck, and my shoulders again, and he pushed me gently back down to the bed. He pressed carefully against me, his skin so cold against mine that it seemed to burn. I put my arms around him and tried to pull him closer.

Again, Edward stopped, but instead of pulling away, he laid his head against my chest, breathing shallowly. "Hmmm," I think I heard him say.

My own breathing steadied, and I closed my eyes to enjoy the feel of Edward's skin against mine. But before I could get comfortable, my body betrayed me. Suddenly I was shuddering and I had to struggle to keep my teeth from chattering.

Edward immediately tensed and with a single motion he pulled away, found a blanket and tucked it around me and was sitting by my side. "Bella, how can this work? How can we be close?" He asked staring inscrutably at the floor.

"Wait." I was sitting up now holding the blanket around me trying to fight off the cold that had seeped under my skin. "You are going to let temperature get in the way? Here we are in love, getting married, a human and a vampire, and you are going to let temperature get in the way? You were so gentle tonight and I'm feeling so . . . good." My temper was ebbing and my confidence was growing.

I moved toward Edward slowly. He continued to hang his head. I reached out to touch his naked shoulder, and then put my hand under his chin. He let me lift his head. "Look at me Edward. I'm better now, I was just cold." Then I climbed onto his lap, my legs straddling him, still hugging the blanket to my body. "Still warm." I said and brought my face to his. Kissing him tenderly I managed to say, "Still warm." I pulled my body into his, letting only our closeness hold the blanket in place as we wound our arms around one another. "Still warm enough." I cooed. And we carefully kissed until the sky grew pink with the dawn.

I must have faded into unconsciousness at some point during the early morning hours because I woke in Edward's arms, just a blanket between my chest and his. Edward was cold and hard, but I didn't consider myself uncomfortable in the least. I kept my eyes closed, enjoying the moment, the hard edge of Edward's chest under my hand, his amazing scent bleeding into my skin, now that I was closer to him than ever before.

A grin escaped to my lips, giving away my conscious state. Edward's cold hand tussled my hair, and he gingerly pulled himself from underneath me so that he was lying by my side, his head held in his hand. "Morning," he murmured simply, and I opened my eyes to see a broad smile lighting up his face, his eyes piercing deeply into mine. My heart sputtered as I gazed at Edward, finally half-naked in my bed, and the electricity that seemed to always charge the space between us was ignited, full force.

"Morning," I replied more huskily than I intended.

Edward reached out to hold the curve of my waist in his hand, careful to keep the blanket between us. I couldn't be sure, but it seemed like he was holding me at arm's length.

"How did you sleep?" he asked, still smiling warmly down at me.

"You should know," I replied, following my answer with a deep yawn. "Well, but probably not long enough. One of the hazards of having a vampire for a boyfriend."

Edward scowled slightly. At first I thought it must be because I called him a vampire, but then I realized it was because I called him my boyfriend. I didn't know if I would ever get used to the idea of marriage, but I certainly didn't want to hurt Edward's feelings.

"Fiancé," I corrected.

"Bella, it's worse than saying boyfriend when you say fiancé with such disdain." I was disappointed in my ability to kill the mood so completely.

"Do you have plans today?" I asked in an attempt to change the subject.

"I do have something in mind. Something occurred to me last night as you were sleeping. Do you have plans today, Bella? Would you like to spend the day with me?"

"I'm hoping to spend every day with you from here on. What are we doing?"

"It's a surprise. I'll pick you up in an hour. Pack a bathing suit."

"A bathing suit?" I glanced up to see rain lightly splattering against my windowpane and shivered.

Edward was already up, his shirt on but hanging open since its buttons were scattered on the floor. His mood seemed to have recovered, the hint of a sparkle in his eyes. I made a mental note to try to avoid all such slipups in the future. Everything was going so well between the two of us, I didn't want to ruin it with semantics.

I carefully wrapped myself in the blanket and got up to kiss Edward goodbye. I was surprised at the intensity of his embrace. He seemed unguarded, his kisses deep and sure, his arms crushing my body into his. "It only gets more difficult to let you go." He whispered. But he pulled himself away and was out the window.

With an eye to the dreary weather outside I dressed warmly in jeans and a fleece pullover and then made my way downstairs for breakfast. After a quick bowel of cereal Edward was at the door. "That wasn't even half an hour."

"I told you it was getting harder to stay away. Are you ready?"

Edward was eager. I was curious.

"Can we take my truck?" I asked.

Edward rolled his eyes. "It all depends, would you like to get there today?"

I loved my truck, and I knew its days with me were numbered. Part of our bargain was that Edward could buy me a fast car once we were married. I wanted to make these next few weeks count.

"Please Edward. I'm giving this truck up for you. Humor me." I wasn't above begging, especially now that I knew it worked.

"OK, we'll take the truck, but I drive."

I could live with that, but I had one more condition. I still needed time to process Jake's disappearance on my own. I didn't want it to take away from the time I spent with Edward.

"One more thing."

Edward raised his eyebrows, always cautious when it came to agreements.

"No Jake, not today. I want today to be about us."

I thought I saw a look of pain flit across his face, but it was gone so quickly that I might have made it up. Edward smiled. "Today is just about you and I. That's exactly how I intended it."

We took the one oh one north toward Port Angeles, but turned onto a park road before we hit town. The truck sputtered as we climbed higher and higher into the mountains. The path wound back and forth through impossibly tall trees that filtered the green light onto the forest floor. As the truck struggled upwards, the damp dirt of the forest drive was replaced with ferns, moss and wet leaves. Not many drove this far. The only sound was the tires over the wet underbrush and rain pattering on the ground. Finally the truck could go no further as the forest completely claimed the road.

"I think I should carry you from here, the path gets a bit treacherous."

That was all I needed to hear, I had no intention of blazing any backwoods trails. I hopped onto his back, thinking that quite soon I would be able to keep up with Edward on my own. The rain started to come down harder and Edward took off so that my wet hair whipped behind me. The air was thinner this high up, and the forest was shrouded in clouds, so that I could only see the green outlines of undefined shapes as we flew by them up the mountain.

Edward stopped sooner than I would have expected. Clouds crowded into a clearing that was bordered on two sides by steep granite walls covered with ferns and emerald green moss. White three-petaled flowers entirely covered the ground, except for a spot near the walls where clouds seemed billow from the ground up. The only sound was water, falling on the forest underbrush, and trickling over stones. Edward set me down and my feet were completely covered in thick green moss.

"This is like a fairy tale. What is this place?"

"If it has a name, I don't know it. The water you hear is from Wolf Creek. Most people follow Boulder Creek up from the road; it's just four miles in. But there we'd be likely to run into hippies and backpackers, and the water is dirty and shallow. Here, we're days inland, by human speed. I've never seen anyone else here. The natives do have a tale about it though. Two large beasts that they call lightening fish, what we would call dragons, hated one another. They battled here in this forest, but it was a draw; neither could win. So they retreated to their caves, crying hot dragon tears. These are their tears," Edward explained bringing me to the edge of the hole that billowed clouds.

The first thing I noticed was the smell of sulphur. When my eyes grew accustomed to the dark and damp, I noticed bubbling water filling the void.

"Is this another legend that's actually real?"

"Legends are often based in reality. Carlisle says they are humans' way of describing the supernatural."

I looked around warily. "Well, then can vampires take dragons?" I half-joked.

"I don't know; I've never tried." Edward smiled, clearly unafraid. "I'll be on the other side of this rock wall to give you privacy. But I promise to keep my eye out for dragons."

"Privacy for what?"

"To change into your bathing suit."

I stared at Edward, uncomprehending.

"Bella, this is a hot spring, people bath in it. The minerals are supposed to be soothing. This is something nice."

Edward didn't have to walk far to disappear into the thick mist, but I ducked behind a large tree trunk, shy nonetheless. I quickly changed into my swimsuit. The only bathing suit I had was the black one-piece I had purchased for swim class in Phoenix. I was torn about whether or not I regretted that I didn't have something more revealing. When I was done changing, I folded my clothes neatly and looked around for Edward, shivering. I didn't see him, so I walked carefully to the edge of the pool, the moss like a cushion on my bare feet.

I tentatively dipped my foot into the water. It was like a warm bath. This was the way water was supposed to feel. I eased myself gently into the pool and sat gingerly on the bottom, and the warm water came up to my chest. Aside from the unsettling smell of rotten eggs, this was actually very nice. And I was glad that I was sitting when I saw Edward emerge from the fog, wearing only a pair of blue swim trunks. I would swear he was the stone rendering of Adonis or Hercules, except I doubted that marble could move with such grace. He eased into the small pool directly across from me and I tingled from head to toe.

"Is this something you do often?" I asked.

"It never appealed to me, until just recently."

Edward reached his hand toward mine under the water hesitantly, like it was the first time. "I was thinking about temperature," he said, seemingly apropos to nothing. But as I touched his fingers I understood. His hand while still hard and unyielding wasn't cold to the touch.

I didn't have to say anything; my quick smile was all it took for Edward to see that his experiment had worked. We intertwined our hands, and our feet touched from across the pool. My skin burned where it touched Edward's, but it wasn't the cold burn I had become used to. There were no words for this, so we settled on just enjoying the feel of each other's skin as time spun around us in circles. Eventually, Edward pulled my body into his and his kiss was cold, but my body felt warm as it melded to his. But just like this morning I felt his hands take hold of my waist, moving my body arms length from his. As I looked up to him he was grinning, his lips pressed together. His eyes were the color of creamy caramel today. "It's just temperature, how could I let that get in the way?"

We spent hours talking, making plans about cities we would visit together, dreams we shared, wedding gifts for our families, even about college courses I'd like to take at some point. Our bodies were touching the entire time, fingers, feet, and the occasional kiss. But although time seemed to stand still here, my body noticed its passage. Edward was the first to point out that my fingers had long since turned to prunes. And I could see that the shadows had changed and it that night was quickly approaching. Despite the safety I felt when I was with Edward, I was still wary of the dragons he had mentioned earlier in the day. I had all of the legend I could handle at this moment.

It wasn't until we were dressed in dry clothes, and safely inside the cab of my truck that Edward said under his breath, so quiet he may not have meant for me to hear, "I know where I'm taking you for our honeymoon."

"Where?" I asked, my heart suddenly beating wildly at the thought of our honeymoon.

"I'm not telling." Edward kept his eyes on the road.

"Another surprise? Two in one day?" I asked. I hated surprises and Edward knew that.

"You'll never get it out of me," he said, smiling in my direction.


	10. Arrival

We talked strategy the whole flight from Italy to Riyadh. It would be just the three of us against a small army. Alice said it would be no problem; they were new and untrained. But with just three of us we couldn't make mistakes. Jasper took us through tactics and formations using the on-flight liquor bottles that no one on this plane had any desire to drink.

Even though I was still feeling guilty about getting us into this, I was pretty pumped. It was such a rush to go into a fight like this, to really give it to someone. And then there was Rose; she was smoking hot. They had us change before we left, saying we needed some decorum or something. So Jazz and I were now in tuxes, and Rose was in this sparkly white number: deep V-neck, backless, floor-length with a slit that should be outlawed. Damn, she was hot.

I wasn't sure about fighting in this get-up, but they let us bring our bags, so we had clothes to change into. Of course, after arriving in Saudi Arabia, we couldn't just walk out of the plane wearing tuxes and that dress. Number one: it's sunny in the desert, so we'd all be pretty conspicuous. Number two: people in Saudi Arabia cover up, a lot. So Jasper and I had these headdress things and some dark shades, we just had to keep our hands in our pockets while we were out in public. Rose on the other hand had to wear an abayah. I always thought it was called a burkha. Anyway, she'd be covered from head to toe. It would certainly make going out in the sun easier. I wondered if there were more of us here in the Middle East than we all realized.

I was listening to old school Beastie Boys on my iPod as the small private plane taxied along the runway. Heat came up off the tarmac in waves, so that the buildings and lights of Riyadh shimmered like a mirage. If vampires have adrenaline, mine was pumping. I look back on our handlers, and there was no apparent adrenaline there. Jane, Felix, and Valentino were all dressed in black, and had been completely still for the entire ride. They could have been going to a funeral. Where Valentino had been talkative and friendly when we first met, he looked angry and grim. I wondered if near annihilation would do that to anyone, or if it was just Valentino's nature. I didn't wonder too long, just took note that I had created an enemy.

The plane came to a stop and stairs where brought up alongside. Felix strode over and threw the door open. Heat hit us like a wall as Jasper, Rose and I stepped onto the landing. There was weight to the air, yet the shimmering city seemed like it could possibly float away the way it shook in front of us.

"Andiamo!" Valentino commanded behind us. Jasper and I donned our headdresses and glasses, our hands coolly in our pockets. Rose slung the abayah over her frame, only her amber eyes showing. I always suspected it, but now I knew; Rose was hot even covered completely from head to toe.

Only after I started down the stairway did I notice two black Mercedes 4 X 4's with blackened windows waiting for us on the tarmac.

"Subito!" Two strong hands shoved me from behind, and I spun around instinctively ready to strike. A growl escaped from Valentino's lips, Felix held him by one arm, but it looked to be more for show than for any real restraint. Jane's eyes glowered from behind the abayah.

"Emmett, let's go," Jasper was stern. I felt my anger ebb as he took my arm and turned me forcibly around. Rose grabbed my other hand and pulled me down the stairs.

"Focus, Emm," Rose hissed. "They're not going to make this easy for us. Let's just do this and go home."

We slid into the creamy leather interior of the first waiting SUV, and the door silently closed behind us. The road from the airport took us through the heart of the city. Skyscrapers, malls, bazaars, and palm trees lined both sides of the large thoroughfare, the congested streets keeping traffic at a crawl. It gave us a chance to take everything in, men mostly in long white robes and headdresses, and the few women we saw were all dressed like Rose. The sky was hazy with a brown-blue hue to it. The buildings got progressively lower, farther apart and camels showed up along the route.

Finally, we left all traces of civilization behind us, and we were left with the black road, and red-brown sand that rose in dunes, irregular and rippling along the highway. The sky was a deep aquamarine out here, with just a few gossamer clouds very high in the sky that managed to stretch from one side of the horizon to the other.

Then without warning, the SUVs pulled off the road and headed straight for the dunes. By the position of the sun in the sky I could tell that we were headed south. The dunes rose higher and turned a lighter shade of tan as we drove through a narrow corridor in the sand. Then suddenly, the path sloped down and the dunes flattened out and as far as we could see was dry cracked earth covered with a layer of yellow-brown salt.

This place was like Bizarro Forks, the complete opposite of our current hometown in the Pacific Northwest. No moisture in the air, no clouds, no vegetation, and everything was red, tan or brown, with an electric blue sky. There was no place to run and take cover. All was vast, flat and bone dry. It left me feeling very exposed and a bit vulnerable, something I was not familiar with in the least.

The driver and his companion had been non-communicative for the entire trip. It had been implied that they would drive, we would observe. But I was unsettled enough that I couldn't keep quiet. I leaned forward, "What is this place?" I asked.

The guide in the passenger seat slowly took off his dark glasses and turned around. His bright red eyes were illuminated by the sunlight, even through the tinted windows. "Salt flat. Najran emirate, this is Rub' al Khali, The Empty Quarter. Sand, oil and Sakhmet." He said simply in thickly accented English. He turned around again without another word and put his glasses back in place. I suppose our conversation was over.

I turned to my brother, seated between Rose and I, who was staring straight ahead into the distance. "So Jazz, there's a lot of sand. Should we work that into our plans? Change things around a little to account for the give in the environment?"

I only realized then that Jasper looked a little sick, if vampires could get sick. His eyes seemed to be searching for something along the horizon and his jaw was clenched. He seemed startled when I spoke. "Umm, Emmett, I, uh, don't know." He shook his head and looked down at his lap.

"Jazz, what is it?" Rose asked, her hand on his shoulder.

Jasper continued to shake his head a little, but said nothing. The car moved into the shadow of a monster dune, and the path seemed to shift ahead of us.

"Jazz, come on. We all need to be on the same page here." I pried.

"Sorry guys." His voice was barely audible. "This place is strange, it's empty. With no one around, it's like I feel less. I think I always focused on the negative aspect of my abilities, feeling what others feel can be overwhelming, a burden. But without people, I'm feeling a bit lost right now. Hollow, somehow."

"Jasper." Rose slid her hand so that her arm wrapped around his shoulders.

Jasper looked down. "Alice would make this better, she'd tell me that this feeling will pass, even if she saw something different. Then I'd make her tell me what she really saw." Alice was really sweet that way, I'd always been pretty sure she did that kind of thing.

Jasper continued, "We've never been this far apart since she found me. The way this place makes me feel so empty inside, it feels evil somehow. I feel evil. I can't wait to get home."

I didn't know what to say to that. Rose looked at me. I could only see her golden eyes wide and sad for our brother underneath the abayah. "Jasper, we'll be your home for now. We'll make sure you get back to Alice," Rose said, and he let his head rest against her. I squeezed Rose's hand, grateful that she could find the words I couldn't.

I looked up to see four red eyes staring at us through the rear-view mirror, still and questioning. Whatever. I slapped Jasper on the knee in an effort to bring him out of it. But when he didn't look up I just let my hand rest there.

Even in the 4 X 4's, it was rough travel, and our guidess seemed to drive randomly, turning around sand mountains that we watched drift from the windows. But then, on the horizon to the east there appeared a cluster of low, white buildings surrounded by a wall fitted with guard towers. Green streamers with white Arabic writing hung from rafters on the roofs. It was shaded on all sides by palm trees, and there was a large caravan of camels and tents off to one side. We continued across the open desert toward the compound since there were no roads leading up to it.

As we got closer, I could see humans camped in the caravan. They wore long white and tan tunics, their heads covered to protect them from the scorching sunlight. The children were running and playing as their mothers tried to herd them away from the approaching SUVs. Their encampment was arranged in a circle, with goats and chickens in the center. The tents were colorful, reds, purples, and yellows, flapping in the dry dessert wind.

We drove up to two enormous metal gates that opened automatically as the cars drew near. Inside the compound it was again deserted, feeling very much the same as the surrounding landscape. The cars pulled right up to the front door of the main building, and our guides were immediately at the passenger doors, holding them open. As I climbed out of the car I noticed sand devils spinning in the empty space of the courtyard, and a darkening brown cloud on the horizon. Jasper looked like he was going to be sick.

Two large wooden doors that might look at home on a castle opened, and a tall and slender vampire dressed formally in a suit and tie beckoned us forward. "Felix, Jane, Valentino, it's been some time. I see you've brought newcomers with you. Please enter before we are caught in the storm."

We were escorted into the dim light of the main house. It was much cooler inside. There were no noticeable furnishings around us, just a low room with pillows strewn around the periphery. Another identically dressed vampire appeared at a distant doorway, then was at our side.

"Your headdresses and coverings, sirs and madams." We followed the example of our Volturi escorts, and handed our Arab coverings to the servant.

"Rosewater?" He produced warm scented towels to freshen our face and hands.

"This way, please. Sakhmet will see you now."

We wound through sparsely decorated rooms, all dark, all smelling of incense. Finally, our guide brought us to a large golden door, inlaid with what looked to be Egyptian hieroglyphics. The room inside was a bit brighter than the rest of the maze we had just been led through. Sunlight streamed through a circular skylight in the ceiling. The room itself was circular, with a raised dais on one end.

All of our eyes were immediately drawn to the creature lounging on thick crimson pillows on the platform in front of us. The red, piercing eyes told us clearly that she was vampire. Her heart shaped face was fierce and feminine, and her full lips held a smile at the edges. Lustrous blue-black hair hung straight to her tiny waist. Her figure was ridiculous, even compared to Rose, voluptuous hourglass curves were accentuated with a thick gold, jewel-encrusted belt at her waist. The belt held a bright orange wrap in place, but the garment hid little of her chalky ebony skin. She turned to face us, and a ruby fixed on her forehead gave her almond-shaped eyes a blood-red malevolent glare.

"Hmm," she smiled up at Jane, Felix and Valentino. "What affords me the honor of a visit from the Volturi, my European friends?"

"It's a pleasure to see you again Sakhmet. It has been too long." Jane didn't answer her question.

Sakhmet's eyes narrowed, and her gaze flickered across the gathering of foreign vampires in front of her. "Five hundred years, give or take."

"Sakhmet, we're here on business from the council. We have been informed about an uprising with its root in your compound." Jane seemed to acquiesce something with her explanation.

"Ha ha ha!" Sakhmet's laugh was rich and deep, shaking her golden jewelry. She covered her mouth with her bejeweled hand and composed herself effortlessly.

"I'm sorry. My apologies. I mean no disrespect, for we all know that the Volturi is indispensable. But do you really mean to assist Sakhmet, the goddess of war, with the destruction of six or seven newborn vampires? Please go back to the council, tell them that your services are not needed here."

This time Felix spoke, and I noticed that he bowed his head ever so slightly. "It is our honor to be in your presence, Sakhmet. We are under strict orders from Aro. This is a test for these three here, testing the allegiance of our American cousins. Jane, Valentino and I are here to simply observe and report back. We do not doubt your prowess, and would never have considered this trip unless we were under orders."

Sakhmet turned and seemed to really look at the three of us for the first time, sizing us all up with a quick but deeply contemplative glance. First she looked me up and down, and her grin stayed smug and menacing. Then she moved on to Rosalie and her eyes narrowed and her smile shifted to a snarl. Finally her eyes settled onto Jasper. Her superior attitude gave way almost immediately and her facial features relaxed into a look of calm satisfaction. Jasper was always at it, I guess. I turned to wink at Jasper, but the look on his face froze me in my tracks. Was it possible that his skin had turned a greenish hue? His face was pinched in concentration and his fists were clenching and unclenching, but his eyes were frighteningly soft and wide. I had never seen anything like it.

I looked back at Sakhmet; her grin was wide now, flashing her bright white teeth in the light filtering in from the ceiling.

"Very well. I don't know your story, and I don't have to. It pleases me to have you here. I should enjoy the company." Her eyes were locked with Jasper's. "Please accept my humble accommodations. According to my sources, the party you are here to meet will be returning within two weeks time."

"Tell us where they are. We will go to them." Jasper's voice was broken and rough.

"We stay here," Jane was uncompromising, "orders." She smiled smoothly, obviously enjoying Jasper's apparent discomfort.

Sakhmet turned to Jane. "Why not just kill them? Why the ruse?" Her grin never left her lips.

"They have conquered larger armies in the recent past. One way or the other it will be settled," Jane replied.

"A mystery," Sakhmet murmured. "I love mysteries." She smiled full on at Jasper.

He coughed and seemed to pull his thoughts from some far away location as he said, "Ma'am, we'll require some help with logistics. Can you tell us whom we will be fighting? What is their motivation? Any help you could give would be greatly appreciated." When Jasper was nervous sometimes the Southern gentleman emerged. It seemed to do the job with Sakhmet.

"Yes, of course." Her eyes were for Jasper only.

I felt myself relax; finally Jasper seemed to be regaining his composure.

"What do you know about me?" She asked Jasper, but I imagined the question was for all of us.

"Ma'am, we're not acquainted with the name Sakhmet. I'm sure our father Carlisle, or our brother Edward might know. They are both much more knowledgeable about the rest of our kind."

"Nothing?" Her voice was more severe. "Nothing about the goddess Sakhmet? Is it true then that the gods have faded in the new world?"

"It's how we are able to live among the humans, ma'am," Jasper replied.

"You must all be young. What is this existence without reverence? Without worship? I am Sakhmet; they call me the god of war and of death. It is how the humans interpret my strength and my desire for blood. I come from Egypt, forced out about 500 years ago, after I became enraged and left a path of destruction that caused the Nile to run red and left the humans in that region decimated. The Vultori _allowed_ me to come here," she said with a sneer in Jane's direction.

"Here where there are no humans, no rivers, nothing but oil underneath my feet. But my followers don't forget me; the Bedouins have ranged all across this middle desert for as long as I have ruled over them. They find their way over the lines of nations to make regular sacrifices. And who could stop them? There is no government to speak of here, no human interference. I am the law. I control the oil, the wealth it brings, the workers that bring it to the surface."

"Excuse me," Rose said impatiently, "that doesn't exactly explain why we're here." Sakhmet looked Rose up and down, appraising.

"No my little friend. No one has exactly explained to me either why you are here." And then her eyes settled on Jasper again, and he clutched his chest and gritted his teeth. "What is it they say in your language? A picture is worth one thousand words, I think. Come with me, tell me how many words my harem is worth."

And with that Sakhmet was on her feet and sauntering towards a door at the opposite end of the room, beckoning us with her finger. I exchanged glances with Jasper and Alice, but the sound of Jane clearing her throat behind us left no question that we were expected to follow. I nudged Jasper in the side as Sakhmet led us through another dizzying array of corridors.

"Jazz, what's going on?"

Sakhmet continued to talk as if Jasper were the only one present, "We have similar gifts."

"Our gifts are not the same," Jasper responded to her. Then he turned to Rose and I. "She can influence emotion as well. But I think she can only elicit one specific emotion.

Sakhmet seemed to ignore Jasper's contradiction, "And you are skilled in the art of war?"

"That's no longer my life, I've changed. I'm here now to protect the life of a human."

"You are a vampire, you can't change. You only pretend to change, there is a difference."

"Jasper, what emotion?"

Jasper was about to respond, when we arrived at another large golden door. Behind it we could hear the murmuring of many voices in a foreign language. She knocked three times, and it opened. Inside was a sea of human males, all dark-skinned, all relatively young. They wore white and tan robes similar to those worn by the humans we passed on our way into the compound. They were lounging, talking in groups, seated on the cushions that were thrown about the room.

But as Sakhmet stepped into the doorway suddenly all eyes were fixed on her and all talking ceased. One by one the males dropped to their knees and bowed their heads to the floor.

She turned and looked at me for the first time since she had laid eyes on Jasper. That's when I felt it, and my eyes clouded over and my body was on fire. "Desire," she said to me. "I make men want me."

She turned back to the throng of men and as suddenly as it hit me, the feeling left. "This is where the newborn came from. His name is Abu Nuwas." Then Sakhmet turned to look at Jasper. "I can sense your thirst, you have not changed. Take whichever you want. I do not mind. It is my gift."

Jasper grimaced and turned away. Every muscle in his body seemed taught. He looked ready to strike or run. Instead he turned back to Sakhmet. "I came with you to learn about our opponent. That's the information you promised us."

"As you wish, perhaps another time. The invitation is an open one." With that she walked through the doorway and took her place on a platform similar to the one she had been seated on in the other room. The mass parted for us to walk through, and she extended her arm, indicating that we should all sit around her. There wasn't a murmur from the crowd, whose heads were still bowed.

"I assumed Abu Nuwas was the same as every human in this room, brought as an offering. But he was different. While others come to me with caresses and kisses, he used his lips in a different way. He had a way with words."

"The night I selected him, he composed some of the most beautiful stanzas that I have ever heard. He pleased me more than any other has in many years. That night I never used him for his body, and I didn't use him to quench my thirst. I sent him away with the morning, and the next night I asked for more poetry. He made my head spin with his words, and then I took him to bed. But again, I spared his life. In that way, I brought him back to me night after night, and I was amused and delighted."

"The boy was in love of course, and begged me to turn him. So I did, out of a desire to have poetry dedicated to my beauty and exploits forever, and a willing and tireless concubine for the ages. But he believed I changed him for a mate; he thought this change would secure my love for him."

"When I resumed my nightly human habit he was so upset and disappointed that he could create no more poetry. As a vampire he was useless. And with a bit of weakness on my part, I spared his life and made him leave instead of killing him. He said if he couldn't have me, then no one could. That's when he started the talk about the army."

"They are a small bunch, never more than ten. They kill each other almost as quickly as they can find someone new. Abu Nuwas is just a silly poet looking for a poetic death. I would easily do away with them on their return. I have two valiant fighters at my disposal. There is nothing his silly little gang can do to me."

"So you see, I don't need you here. There are not enough people in this region to cause much suspicion. This is not an issue for the Volturi. Aro knows your services here are not needed. Aro must have known how delicious you would appear to me, your battle scars shining and sparkling in the desert light."

"Aro wants proof of our allegiance."

"Perhaps Aro wants to break your coven any way he can. Perhaps he knew you would want to be here with me. Perhaps he would like to change your strange golden-eyes to red."

"We have a job to do. I need to speak with my siblings, and we are going to need to feed often before the fight to keep up our strength."

"Just as much as you are trying to force disinterest onto me right now, I am trying to draw you in. It is working. You want me, I can feel it."

"No, Can you feel the deep affection I have for my mate Alice."

"Yes, something I have never felt before from one of our kind. This mutual affection attracts me as much as your appearance and experience. It is something I would like to know more about. As for sustenance, what is mine is yours." She swept her hand out to encompass the crowd around us.

"No, we're not changing our diet. That wasn't part of the deal."

"Very well, ask Chun-Tao and Dong-Mei to take you into the Southwest. In the mountains there you will find ibex, hyena and wildcats. Will this do?"

I wondered if ibex was a type of desert bear, but had no opening to ask. As far as Sakhmet was concerned, Jasper was the only other person in the room.

"Eat now and ease your thirst. Then come to me later. This could be your destiny my young friend. Think of the power you would wield working with the goddess of war."


	11. Sunset

"Well, Bella, this is just about perfect." Alice's voice brought me back from my daydream and I looked up to see her hanging my wedding gown and securing it in its garment bag. The sun was out today, so we were meeting at her house. Bright honey-gold rays beamed through the floor-to-ceiling windows in her and Jasper's bedroom. Alice's face and arms were sparkling behind me.

"Everything's almost ready, really," Alice continued. "There are just a few last-minute details to iron out. But Esme and Renee are working on it. Not much work for me to do anymore." Alice's voice trailed off on what seemed like a note of sadness.

"Alice, is something wrong?"

"Nothing," she said too quickly, even for Alice. She turned swiftly back to the dress so that I couldn't see her face, and acted completely preoccupied.

"I'm serious, Alice, something isn't right."

"Bella, it's nothing." Alice turned towards me but her eyes didn't meet mine. The contrast between her brilliant skin and her dull eyes was discomforting. "I miss Jazz," She said like she was trying out the phrase to see if it fit, and when she finally looked at me there was no mistaking the sadness on her tiny face.

I was by her side as quickly as my human limbs would take me to her, my arms around her cold shoulders. She ducked her head into my hair and her deep gasping breaths could easily be confused for sobs. I held her like that for a long time, and eventually her breathing became more even.

Jasper, Emmett and Rose were on a trip to The Yukon, meeting up with Peter and Charlotte. Alice hadn't gone because she said she had too much wedding planning to do. But it dawned on me that they had been gone much longer than Alice said they would.

"Sorry Bella. I try not to let myself go like that. It's just so hard without anyone around to talk to."

"Alice, that's silly, you can always talk to me. Talk to me!"

"Bella, don't." Alice's facial features smoothed and she was all business again. "I'm fine. It's nothing." She was quickly up and collecting her things, the reflections of her sparkling skin lingered longer on the walls than her body did in the room. She was a blur of white skin and black hair as she put everything back in its place.

"Alice!"

She turned to face me. "Bella, I can't."

"What haven't you said about Jasper?" I asked, trying to grasp the reason behind her despondency.

She shook her head like she was trying to physically dislodge a thought. "Hey, you know what would make me feel better?" There was the hint of an impish grin on Alice's face.

I knew exactly where she was going with this. She had been trying to persuade me for days now. "No. No, no, no. I've told you, no wedding shower, and no bachelorette party. It's not happening."

"OK. I know." The pain in Alice's eyes returned and I considered relenting just to make her feel better. "Is there anything else I can do?"

Alice cocked her head to the side and looked at me like she was trying to solve a riddle. Then her eyes sparkled just slightly and she turned to look at her closet doors. A more appropriate term would have been dressing room doors; her closet was larger than my bedroom back at Charlie's house.

"We could play dress up," she suggested, looking at me mischievously.

I groaned, but more out of show. Alice knew it. I'd do about anything if I could make her feel better without committing myself to another formal gathering.

"Come on Bella, it will be fun. And I can tell you all about what it's like to live with a vampire boy. You must have some questions."

That grabbed my attention. "OK," I acquiesced, "I'm yours."

With that Alice was a flurry of activity. In a split second the closet doors were open and she was somewhere inside. "So, questions?" she called out to me.

I wasn't sure where to begin. "Um, where's Edward today?"

"I made him leave for the fitting." Alice evaded my question as she swung a peacock evening gown over my head and fastened a series of clasps along my back. I worried a little, remembering that the last time Alice dressed me this way I ended up at the prom.

"Yes, but where did he go?"

"He would kill me if I told you. Next question?"

"Where is he taking me on our honeymoon?"

"You'll find out soon enough. I must say, it took Edward long enough to figure it out. He should have just asked me. Now do you have any real questions?" Alice was back in the closet rooting around.

Looking out the window I noticed that the sun was making its way towards the Western horizon. "Well, what do you guys do all night?"

"Bella!"

I blushed, "No, that's not what I meant. Besides that?"

"Whatever you would do during the day. I work on my designs mostly, and the boys prefer hunting at night, except for Edward. He watches you sleep. He's the only vampire I know that does that." Alice emerged from the closet and shook her head, displeased with the gown for some inscrutable reason. She handed me a pair of designer jeans, a black halter-top and red patent leather pumps. "Try these."

"What did Edward do before he started watching me sleep?"

"He was out a lot, I guess you'd have to ask him. He was really considerate that way, but I think we all worried that we drove him out. Hmm, I don't like it," she said eyeing my new ensemble critically, "too trashy. Anything else?"

I couldn't hold back anymore. I hadn't spoken to anyone except for Edward about this. Who else could I confide in about sex with my vampire fiancé? From what Alice hinted at, she knew pretty well what was going on with Edward and I. "Alice, am I being realistic? About after the wedding?"

Alice smiled and looked the other way. I think she might have blushed if she could.

"I know he's your brother Alice, but I could use someone to talk to too. He won't hurt me, will he?"

"Bella, I wish everyone around here would realize that I would never let anything happen to you! It's almost insulting. If Edward were going to hurt you, then I would stop him."

"I knew it."

"It won't be anything that you can't walk off," she added ducking back into the closet. It seemed to take her a few extra seconds this time around, but her face was composed as she emerged with a lavender sequined cocktail dress. "Try this."

I was feeling pretty triumphant in my discovery. I was right all along. But a new thought dawned on me. "It doesn't matter to him though, does it? He doesn't believe it."

Alice stopped what she was doing to look at me. "No. He doesn't trust himself. Bella, it may not happen, you know. It's hard for him. But that's just because he loves you."

"That seems a little backwards."

"Here, try this." Alice pulled out a black cocktail dress with a cutout back. "Very nice, maybe with something sparkly."

Now that I was warmed up, it was easier to continue. "Will it be the same for him as it is for me?" I asked struggling with the tight bodice of the dress.

"No of course not," Alice laughed as she found necklace with a sapphire pendant. "He's a vampire."

"Does it lead to the same thing?" I asked as Alice threw me a blue skirt and a fitted white top to try on.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, you know, at the end . . ."

Alice smirked. "Yes, very similar I think. But I've heard that afterward humans need to rest. That's different. But nothing will be the same for you two. He'll have to be so careful. Oh yes, that's perfect!" Alice said, surveying her work. "Just look!" She spun me around toward the mirror.

The cobalt blue pencil skirt was very form fitting and fell just below my knees. There were slits up either side. The sleeveless button down shirt had a deep V-neck and was tailored to enhance my cleavage. Alice was in and out of the closet in a second and fastened a wide black belt around my waist. I was surprised how tiny she was able to make it look. "Like a modern-day Vargas girl! Here." She applied some dark red lipstick to my lips, and fixed a wide black headband in my hair. "Now we just need some shoes. Black flats, perfect. Don't worry about grass stains, I want you to keep it all, you look stunning." Alice smiled at me and then towards the door. It was good to see her smile again.

I searched the skirt but didn't see any stains. "What do you mean about grass stains?"

But before she could answer I heard Edward's voice outside the bedroom door. "Dinner!" Alice was opening the door in an instant, "Come in!"

I turned to see Edward with a whicker box in his hands.

"Dinner?"

"Bella?"

Edward and I spoke simultaneously. His seemed taken aback, his eyes darting back and forth between my silly outfit and my face. I noticed that it was taking him some effort to concentrate on my face.

"Bella was humoring me, keeping me company." Alice said by way of explanation.

"Dinner?" I asked again.

Edward was at my side, his hands lightly on my hips. I noticed the whicker box on the floor in the doorway. "I don't feed my human fiancé enough. I thought you could eat out back by the river. It's lovely out." Edward forced his gaze back to my face.

"You two should get out of here. The sun's going in for an hour or so, just long enough to get to a little spot Jasper and I know." She was silent as she described it to Edward in her mind.

"Can we take my truck?" I asked.

"Do I have a choice?"

"You can take it most of the way." Alice compromised for the two of us. "Now, shoo!" She pushed us toward the door. "You guys are too cute. Get out of here."

But I turned around to face her, "Alice, you should come! You shouldn't be alone. Not without Jasper here."

"No!" two voices said in unison. Alice grinned, and turned quickly, but not before I saw the sadness creep back into her eyes for an instant. I looked at Edward, and his eyes were glued to my body. I trembled with anticipation.

"OK, then."

The weather had turned unexpectedly hot for Forks standards, but the ever-present dampness still hung in the air. We rolled the truck windows down as far as they could go, and warm wind whipped my hair around my face and out the window. My skirt and shirt, which were already form fitting, clung to my body. Edward pushed my truck to its limits, one hand resting on my knee. "I think perhaps you and Alice should play dress-up more often." His tone was playful, but the look in his eyes was more intense than amused. "You take my breath away."

I found that it was difficult for me to breathe as well.

Edward pulled the truck up to a solid rock wall.

"We're here?" I asked.

"Almost." Edward was already opening my door, and he wound his arm around my waist to lift me down, even though I didn't need the help. He bent his head to kiss my cheek, and the scent of his cold breath washed over me. I held on to him, unsure how steady I might be on my feet. Edward didn't take his eyes off me for a second and I had to make a conscious effort to look away.

"Up there?" I asked, taking in the impossible climb ahead. Gray rock rose jaggedly 100 feet over our heads, covered with moss, licorice fern and wild orchids.

"Yes. But we may have to make a few adjustments to get you up there." He replied huskily. And with that he slid his hands from my waist to my thighs and quickly slipped my skirt a little higher. Instantly his lips met mine, his kisses unguarded and urgent. I kissed him back and the icy feel of his hands on my thighs made me feel slightly unglued. His lips slid down my neck, and light kisses rained down along the neckline of my shirt. I tried to remember to breathe, still clutching his shoulders for support.

"Now what was the reason for this?" Edward teased, running his hands up and down the back of my legs. "Oh yes." He easily swung me around onto his back. His hands were purposeful yet gentle as he grasped my bare legs, and I felt a thrill of electricity as I tightened my arms around him. We flew up the rock wall, following a path only a mountain goat or a vampire might decide upon.

Too quickly we were on a large moss-covered ledge. Small vine maples created a smattering of shade. Before us were the blue-gray waters of the Straight of Juan de Fuca, with Victoria Island beyond.

Edward placed me on the ground and sat close enough that his arm was touching mine. The moss was like a soft carpet underneath us. He opened the box and it was filled with cheese, bread, strawberries, cold pasta salad, sparkling juice, and watermelon. "What is all of this?"

"I believe it's traditional for lovers to enjoy sunset picnics together," he said, seeming more relaxed now. "But I didn't know what you would like. I should know that. I should feed you more often." His eyes danced as sunlight shifted through patchy clouds, creating a mottled gleam on the surface of his chalky skin.

"Where did this come from?"

"Thriftway."

The idea of Edward shopping in the aisles of the Forks grocery store, pushing a cart, or even more unlikely, holding a dirty plastic basket, was absolutely ridiculous. I tried to suppress my amusement at this idea, but a giggle escaped from my lips.

"What?"

I laughed harder.

"Don't you like it?"

I worked to keep a straight face and hesitantly bit into a strawberry. It was delicious. Edward seemed pleased, and ran his hand very lightly along my leg. Instantly, my body temperature cooled and I felt much more comfortable in the stifling heat of the mid-summer afternoon.

"It's so hot out today, your hand feels amazing."

"Really?" He looked pleased with himself as he took off one of my shoes and gently massaged my foot. I sighed. After a few minutes he moved to the other foot, and then to my legs. I couldn't concentrate on the food anymore. I leaned backwards, my arms bent at the elbows and let my head hang back.

"It's as if you were created to tempt me with every movement." His hands were on my neck and his mouth met mine. Our lips parted and his tongue cooled the inside of my mouth. I could no longer support my weight with my arms and fell onto my back. Edward carefully held himself above me and I lost track of time as his scent, the taste of his tongue and the urgency of his touch overwhelmed me. He pressed his body gently into me while his mouth moved feverishly over mine.

"Are you still warm?" He asked in a husky whisper.

"Mm hmm," I managed.

He let soft kisses rain over my face, and he blew an icy breath into my ear and onto the back of my neck. I pressed my hands into the small of his back, and began kissing him with my lips, my tongue and my teeth. "You're making it very difficult to be good, Bella."

"Don't be then."

Edward paused for a second and then his lips traced the neckline of my damp blouse. His hands were at the top button; it was undone before I cold see what happened. His lips probed deeper into my décolletage.

One after the other Edward loosened all of the buttons until my shirt was completely undone. Edward's cold hands were around my bare waist; his lips and tongue covered every inch of my bare skin with whisper soft ice-cold kisses.

Edward wound one arm around my waist and in an instant he pulled me on top of him. My skirt was hitched almost around my waist so that I could straddle his hips. Our embrace was unbroken, his lips were still on mine, but now his cold hands clasped my bare thighs. I let my full weight bear down on him, pressing my body firmly against his. Edward tightened his grip on my thighs, his tongue probing deeper into my eager mouth. He was like cold stone underneath me, but I only grew warmer as I moved my body against his. And then without warning he sat up, tipping me gently onto my back. He continued to kiss me, but held his body away from mine.

I felt deflated until I noticed his cool hand slowly traveling up my inner thigh. I was immediately on fire again. Even though he was ice cold and I was burning up, the feel of his hand between my legs made me melt. I closed my eyes and bit down on my finger, letting my head role to the side. I panted as Edward moved from kissing my chest, to my abdomen, and then to my waist.

I opened my eyes and gasped. Here on our private perch, looking out over the corner of the continent, the sky was a dazzling display of crimson and orange as the sun hovered over the gray-blue waters of the straight. My senses were overwhelmed and I was frozen, involuntarily gasping for breath. "Oh!" was all I could manage.

Edward was sitting by my side in less than a second.

"What did I do wrong? Did I hurt you?"

I made sure to look him in the eyes and smile. "Oh Edward!" I pulled myself up and put my arms around his waist and laid my head on his shoulder.

"Bella, please, what's wrong?"

I felt sheepish, and hid my face in his chest. "Everything was just so perfect all at once."

A low chuckle escaped from his lips. "I should have known that I couldn't scare you away with a caress." He carefully placed an arm around my waist. "The sunset pales in comparison to you." He pulled me in closer as we watched the sun dip below the horizon.

"This moment is so perfect, like we have no worries in the world. Nothing a kiss and a sunset couldn't take care of." And I kissed his lips lightly to demonstrate my point. But he hesitated slightly and pulled away.


	12. Faith

"You have worries?" His eyes searched my face as if he were looking for the worries written there.

"What?"

"You said 'like you have no worries.' That implies that you have them."

I sighed, "Really?" Edward just looked at me expectantly, waiting. "Well, I worry about the wedding."

"You're still worried about marrying me?"

"There is a difference between marrying you and the wedding. You are the one thing I am sure of."

He kissed my lips gently.

"I'm worried about standing in front of all of those people!"

"That love you and want to see you happy-"

"And then falling on my face!"

"That doesn't seem like much of a worry." And tonight it didn't.

"Is that your only worry then?"

It could almost be true right now, that the wedding was my only worry, the only thing that kept me up at night. I didn't answer, not wanted to ruin this moment.

"Nothing else?"

I sighed again; it was inescapable. Once Edward's thoughts were fixed on a certain course he was hard to distract. "You know all of my worries. I don't think you have to ask. I'm worried that I won't feel the same way about you, afterward."

"We don't have to then, Bella." His voice was gentle, and he caressed my arm. This was an old line of debate, but I enjoyed the gentler tone of his voice, and the way that he said we. This was no longer something that I was doing. But I knew that the love that had softened him made it all the more impossible for me to change my mind.

"My mind is made up on that account. Now what about you?" Now that we had waded into this morass, I decided we might as well do it completely.

"Me?"

"Your worries? Do I even want to know?"

"Well, about damning your soul, of course," he started like he was picking up in the middle of a long litany of misgivings; his eyes focused on some unknown point on the horizon. "And now with our agreement about after the wedding, I am truly taking all of your innocence and your soul too. And I worry that in the process I'll lose control and hurt you."

Edward seemed to stop despite himself and he looked away from me. I reached up to gently take hold of his jaw, and he let me turn his face to mine. There was something else there, something vulnerable that he was trying to mask. He blinked quickly, and looked at the ground.

"What else?" My voice was barely audible, not sure if I wanted to know what else he tortured himself with.

"I'm worried that you will resent me. That when you are changed, when you hunger for blood, you will resent me taking away your goodness. Now your first impulse is for your family and friends, to care for and save the ones you love. Will you resent me for putting everyone and everything second to your thirst for the kill? That worries me."

"Edward, this is my decision. I could never resent you. And who says I have to be a monster?"

"You have admitted as much yourself. Your priorities will change."

"Sure, that's my fear, but I don't think it has to be like that. Look at you. I believe you care more about me than anything."

"Bella, that's after years. And who's to say it's not just selfishness?" He looked out over the water and continued in a quieter tone, "Emmett has a theory."

"A theory?"

"He thinks that maybe our family loves deeply as a substitute for the one thing we deny ourselves, the one thing that would make us feel whole."

I was insulted just by the idea of it. "Well I don't believe in that theory! What I feel for you is the truest, purest emotion I've ever felt. Is it different for you? Because I didn't think I was alone in this."

"Bella, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to offend you. You know I love you more than anything. But there are no good vampires. We just fight what we are and do the best we can at it."

"What about Stregoni Benefici?"

Edward looked taken aback. "The legend?"

"What were you just telling me about legends the other day? They are human interpretations of the supernatural world. So there's at least one documented case of a vampire that fights the forces of evil. I certainly believe in him. Don't you?"

Edward was stunned. "You always surprise me. Don't say anything to Carlisle, though. He gets very embarrassed. But, you're right. As far as I know he has never hurt a soul."

"You believe in souls, you believe in heaven, it's time that you considered faith; maybe not in the religious sense of the word, but like destiny or something. When you were turned into a vampire you may have been fated to be a monster, but you chose not to. Have some faith in your choice."

"Bella, you don't know the things I've done, and I don't want you to, but you have to understand that what I am is not good."

I thought about that for a few seconds. I knew Edward had fed on humans, but I didn't know the details. I didn't need to anymore. "Edward, you need to figure out a way to let go of that. Everyone trusts you except for yourself. Please at least try."

"What we have is right, I have never known anything with more certainty. I have faith in that. We can't know what will happen, but we know it's the only way. Let's just believe in what we know is right." Tears were flowing down my cheeks, the only outlet for deep emotion that I couldn't completely name: a combination of love, conviction, anger and frustration.

Edward's only response was to tighten his grip on my waist, pulling my body closer to his. By now the sun had set, and the air around us was cooling rapidly. A salty breeze blew through my hair and I heard Edward breath deeply. He turned to look down at me and my body tingled like it always did when his face was so close to mine. Very quietly, in almost a whisper he said, "I want to see myself the way you see me, but I don't know if I can. But I'll do what I can, for you, before the wedding."

"No, do it for yourself. I have everything I need.

"I should take you back home. Won't Charlie be getting worried?"

I didn't want to leave, so many things seemed unsaid, but I couldn't begin to fathom what those things might be, or how to start.

"Wait while I try to make myself decent." I said wiping the tears from my eyes and fumbling with the buttons on my blouse.

"Bella, you can dry your eyes and button your shirt, but you will never be decent in that outfit. If Charlie has any sense he won't let you out of his site until the wedding day." I was glad Edward's mood had lightened. His eyes were luminous in the fading light; evidence that the conversation and the setting of the sun had not eclipsed his desire.

"And then you would just climb in my bedroom window anyway."

"Yes, I most definitely would."


	13. Arabian Days

The council's orders were clear, at least to our captors. We were to stay at Sakhmet's compound in Rub' al Khali until the newborn army came to us. And they were on their way. Bedouins came to Sakhmet's camp daily with offerings and stories detailing mysterious deaths and frightening flashes of light glancing off the dunes.

Without our cell phones, it was easy to feel separated from the world as we knew it. It was easy to believe that Sakhmet was the goddess of war, that the dark robes the Volturi guards took to wearing were normal, that there was nothing else in this world except sand and sky. So each day we put effort into keeping true to our purpose in this place. We were here to show our allegiance to the Volturi, and to keep Bella alive.

Each day we would don traditional desert coverings as we ran southwest to the highlands of Asir to hunt, so that we could maintain our peak strength for the fight ahead. With Sakhmet's fighters Chun-Tao and Dong-Mei as our guides we would race through the ever-changing desert landscape, drinking in new desert flavors. I quickly learned that ibex was a giant mountain goat and that it was revolting. There were no bears, but Jasper and I enjoyed the wild cats and Rose had a particular penchant for hyenas.

After the hunt we would practice fighting techniques. Our goal was to obliterate the army as quickly as possible. We learned to take into account the give of the sand, the shifting of the dunes in the wind. We'd take off our desert coverings to get used to the unusual shadows the relentless sun would cast as we sparkled in its glow. It would be a quick fight, we were sure.

We were all eager for this to be over as soon as possible, but no one as much as Jasper. Sakhmet tortured him with her desire and bloodlust whenever he was in the compound. At first Jasper tried to project compassion in the hope that this would mellow her aggression. But this only made her more bewitched with him, and her desire increased exponentially. Then he tried his best to diffuse disinterest into the situation. But Sakhmet would simply turn back to her harem and select another victim for the evening. It was not exactly the outcome that Jasper wished for.

Jasper didn't like to talk about any of this and bore it stoically. Eventually he just shut down. Rose and I were afraid he might come unhinged. We saw less and less of the Jasper we knew, as he had to close off to protect himself. Rose thought that he must be at least flattered, being courted by the goddess of war. Sakhmet was certainly beautiful and willing, waiting for any sign that he might give in. But Jasper wasn't like Rose this way, and I knew it did nothing but cause him pain. Even in this land of intense sun, without Alice, there was no light in Jasper's life.

Our Volturi guards were true to the council's wishes. They remained in the background, observing. At first they would accompany us on our daily hunts and training exercises, but they quickly grew tired of these outings. They knew us enough by now to realize that we would never leave and endanger the rest of our family.

While accompanied by the Volturi, Chun-Tao and Dong-Mei were aloof and would not to let us out of their sight. Their perfunctory duties done, they would run with us back to the compound. But after the Volturi left us alone, their curiosity won out.

I had just finished up another meal of ibex, after searching unsuccessfully for anything else. I grimaced as I wiped the blood from my face and hands.

"Why do you bother?" Dong-Mei asked me, a slight smirk on her face. Dong-Mei seemed to always be suppressing a smile.

It was a good question, I thought, as bitter stinking goat blood coated my throat and sloshed uncomfortably in my stomach.

"We all have different reasons."

She smiled at me. Suddenly she looked as good-natured and playful as a puppy. "What are they?"

"Well, Rosalie never wanted this. She has no desire to act like a vampire. Jasper could feel the emotions of the people that he was feeding on. It became unendurable."

"And you?"

"Rosalie chose this lifestyle. I would do anything to stay with her."

"So you're here for Rosalie."

"Well, no. It's the other way around actually."

Don-Mei knitted her brows together, but then smiled. "Then there must be another reason. Don't you know yourself?"

No one had questioned me so bluntly before. I never really stopped to consider my motivations besides Rose. I didn't know that I had any others. But being here in Rub' al Khali things were clearer to me. I wasn't the same monster as Sakhmet.

I didn't answer Dong-Mei and perhaps she took my silence as an admission that I indeed had no self-awareness. "What does it taste like?" She asked nodding toward the wiry-haired carcass at my feet.

"Well that tastes vile. There isn't the same satisfaction with animal blood, but it's adequate."

She looked slightly repulsed. "A true life of denial, like the yogis in India, or the Monks in Tibet."

I saw Rose running over to join us and smiled. "No, not exactly like the monks."

But the next day the girls hunted with us. I can't say they found it satisfying, but they were interested. I heard them murmur something about playing monks. They mentioned that they had never met another coven that remained in one place for long, and they didn't know the feeling of a family, not as vampires or as humans. As humans, both were reared in an orphanage.

They came with us each day to hunt, and I noticed them watch us carefully as we fought in the desert sands. Night after night they declined Sakhmet's invitation to feed with her. And gradually I could see subtle changes in their eyes, turning from bright red to the color of the dunes, and then to the color of the cloudless desert sky at twilight. Sakhmet might have had an objection to this, but she was otherwise occupied with trying to crack Jasper.

"How did you two end up here with Sakhmet?" I asked as Rose and I were hunting with Chun-Tao one day. They were obviously not from the Middle East.

"We were bored with our job, and we wandered here. Sakhmet asked us to stay because of our fighting skills."

"Your job?"

"We were dragon slayers."

Rose and I stopped what we were doing to stare. My mouth hung open for more than a second.

"Dragons?" Rose was dubious.

"Of course. Women were always picked to be dragon slayers. Dragons have so much yang energy, only a woman could put out that fire."

Rose made sure to correct Chun-Tao. "I wasn't implying that a woman couldn't fight a dragon. I'm just surprised to hear that they exist."

"Thee are no dragons in your world?"

"I don't know." I could see Rose's mind working.

"Dude, how did you get that job?"

"We were chosen, of course." And that was all Chun-Tao would say on the matter.

Jasper caught the end of the conversation as he bounded back in our direction with Dong-Mei at his side. "What are dragons like?" he asked, a palpable edge of excitement in his voice. It was the most emotion I had seen from him in days.

"Well, each is different, much like our kind. Some can shift shape, becoming as small as a silkworm, or growing to fill the sky. Others can fly. They all enjoy water. They rule that element, causing rain and flooding. They can turn into water sometimes, or fire too. Some can just disappear."

"How do you fight that?" I couldn't have pulled Jasper away from this conversation if I tried.

"It takes great concentration and skill. You must understand your own qi before you can even begin to try."

"Why are vampires fighting dragons in the first place?" Rose asked.

Dong-Mei jumped into the conversation enthusiastically. "Dragons don't like vampires. Our existence challenges their supremacy."

"So a class of warriors was raised," Chun-Tao added. "And we were good."

"The best!" Dong-Mei laughed.

"We fought them close to extinction. We followed them to Japan, and chased them over the Himalayas. Everywhere we travelled we studied new forms of fighting. But with only a few dragons left it wasn't fun anymore."

"After all, we'd been fighting for about one thousand years."

"So we travelled, and when we found this place we decided to stay. There's no water, so there are no dragons either. It is an easy life, the break we needed."

"You really don't need us here at all, do you?" It wasn't so much a question as a realization that there had been more to this trip than a simple fight from the beginning.

"No." Dong-Mei giggled.

Jasper was inspired. "We have time on our hands and an army that we have to fight. It may be an easy battle, but all of us must return home. We need to make sure that we have every advantage. Will you teach us?"

Chun-Tao looked reluctant, but Dong-Mei didn't skip a beat. "Yes. It's an honor to teach. First we must harness your qi."

I was suspicious. "This qi, vampires have it too?"

"Yes, of course. It is the energy that animates everything. You do not have to be alive to have energy. If a rock has qi, surely a vampire does as well. You'll see. When you learn to move qi, the control you have over your body will be more fluid and intuitive. You will be quicker, deadlier and more powerful. Let's show them, OK?"

Chun-Tao didn't need any more prompting. She was on her feet in a split second. Dong-Mei was all smiles. I watched the quick decisiveness of their movements and marveled at the unique control they seemed to have over their bodies as they deftly danced around one another, looking for an opening to strike. It defied even what vampires were usually capable of. It seemed as if they moved with an effortless energy suffused with joy.

I was floored, Rose was envious, and Jasper was sold. From then on we would sit for hours as the sand rained on us and the sun moved overhead, finding a way to utilize our otherwise useless breath to grow stronger, learning to move energy through meridians and connect to the earth and the sky. Before long they added the basics of kung fu, judo and karate to our regimen. I felt more centered and sure of my abilities than ever. Despite a diet of slimy mountain goat I felt at the top of my game.

Dong-Mei and Chun-Tao became giddier as we learned their fighting techniques, clearly proud to be the masters. We made teams and then mixed them up and fought again, long hours into the night, coming back before the sun rose on the next day.

"And you've been alone all this time?" I asked one day as we ran back toward the compound.

Chun-Tao looked confused. "We have each other." And with that she playfully tackled Dong-Mei and they somersaulted down a dune.

"I mean as mates?"

Dong-Mei giggled again as she picked herself up and dusted the sand from her abayah. "We have mates."

I thought of the two servants that hovered around the compound. It seemed unlikely. I had never seen any affection between them. I always assumed that Sakhmet kept them there using her powers. But as far as I could tell there were no other vampires here besides us. "The servants?"

Chun-Tao rolled her eyes and seemed exasperated. "We are each other's mates. Do you think Sakhmet would keep two women around otherwise?"

I thought of the way Sakhmet looked at Rose. Probably not.

"Sorry," Rose apologized. "Emmett can be a little slow sometimes." Rose nudged my ribs with her elbow.

"You guys should come back with us. We would love you to meet our family. Meet our brother and his fiancé, see why we are doing this. We would love for you to teach them to fight like you taught us."

"We can't leave here." Dong-Mei didn't seem troubled by this. It was stated like a simple fact.

"But how can Sakhmet keep you here?"

"After the incident with the Volturi she fears for her safety, and always makes sure she has a guard. If we tried to leave she would track us down. They don't call her the goddess of war for nothing. It would be a battle that we would prefer to avoid. We will have to be dismissed without prejudice. She will let us go once she finds someone better qualified. We've been here for a while; no one was better qualified than us. Until now, maybe."

Chun-Tao kicked Dong-Mei in the shin. We all cast a quick look in Jasper's direction. He pretended not to notice.

"We don't mind," Chun-Tao assured Jasper. "We would never want you to leave your family. I don't know them, but admire them. I didn't know there was another way of being. Compassion is a teaching of the Buddha that I didn't think applied to our kind. We need your coven to be strong and intact, so that we can spread word of your existence. Eventually we will be able to leave, when we do, we will find you. We must thank all of you for the enlightenment you have brought to these parts.

"Yes," Dong-Mei continued, "and we will happily fight alongside you when this army arrives."

"I don't think you can do that," Rose said. "They want us to do this. It has to be us."

"We'll ask. Let's go." Dong-Mei was on her feet, smiling and ready to run back to camp.

"No." It was Jasper. "Thanks, but we can do this alone."

The next day on our return to the compound a small figure in black waited for us at the front door of the main building. We all slowed down at the sight of her, and I saw Chun-Tao cast a disapproving glance in Dong-Mei's direction. "It doesn't have to be bad news." Dong-Mei said to her, a bit defensively.

"Hello Cullens, and friends." Jane's eyes were menacing as they flashed toward Dong-Mei. "It appears that a conversation is in order." Her lips were set in a sinister scowl as she began walking slowly and purposefully into the courtyard. I heard the main gate close behind us. The desert wind kicked up as it usually did in the evenings, and sand swept over the grounds and into our faces. Jane's hair whipped around her small head.

"I've had a request. It seems like the Cullens are quite irresistible. Who wouldn't lay their life on the line for a Cullen?" she sneered. It was clearly a rhetorical question. "I'll tell you who wouldn't. I would never. Not a single one of the Volturi guard would ever try to save the life of a Cullen. Your family is on its' own in this world, and don't you ever forget it. There will be no help for the Cullens during this next encounter. No matter how friendly you are. No matter how irresistible you might be. From now on you will be confined to this compound. If you need to feed, I'm sure you can find a rat or a roach. This will be over soon enough. The army will be here in two days time. Then we will see how far your good natures can get you. We will see what your consciences can do."

"We have been somewhat lax in our duties as observers. To make sure that we adhere to the council's instructions, you will stay here and we will observe you one-on-one for the next two days."

"But that makes no sense. If you want us to be successful, and if you want to observe our combat, we need to be prepared. Or is this a plan to kill us one at a time?" I countered.

"You are wrong. And you have no choice." And with that Felix, Valentino, the two servants and Sakhmet walked quietly into the courtyard. Jane snickered, watching us squirm under her new edict. Looking at the gathering before us, it was clear that we should play by the rules. This fight would be too close, with or without martial arts skills.

Dong-Mei cast her eyes to the ground. "I'm so sorry."

Jasper, Rosalie and I stood shoulder to shoulder, not giving in anything in our gaze.

I heard Chun-Tao behind us. "Exercise your qi. It's OK. It's what masters do before battle," she said quietly enough so that her voice was only barely audible to the five of us. No one else gave any indication that they heard anything.

Jane continued, pleased with her new plan. "Rosalie will stay with Felix, Emmett with Valentino, and I will personally keep an eye on Dong-Mei and Chun-Tao. We will make sure you are assembled for the attack before the newborns arrive."

Jasper wasn't accounted for. We looked at Jane and she appeared victorious, as if she had won something here. That's when Sakhmet walked gracefully forward. "Jasper, you are with me."

All eyes were on Jasper now. For an instant he looked so fragile I was afraid he might shatter. But then he closed his eyes, and breathed in through his nose and out through his mouth. I knew what he was doing.

I grabbed his shoulder. "I've been through worse," was his only reply.

He looked at me with his wide golden eyes, so much lighter after days of feeding. I arched my eyebrows to challenge his assertion. "Well, it will be a close call, but she won't break me."

I pulled Rose in and held her in an enormous bear hug. Her arms closed around me just as ferociously. "Two days," she said. "Be good and I'll see you in to days."

"Yes ma'am," I replied, kissing her full and hard on the lips.


	14. Penance

I said I would try. Bella lay sleeping on her bed, twisted sheets at her feet. There was no time better than now to start. She was right. This was something I had to do before the wedding. I didn't know if it would give me faith like Bella suggested, but it would make me deserve her a little more.

I took the list from my pocket. One hundred and eight names on faded yellow paper. I never looked at it; I didn't need to, but I carried it with me nonetheless. My mind kept track better than a piece of paper ever could. Tonight I forced myself to read the names one by one, remembering each face. Robert Bessler, Frank Finley, Raymond Greenwald . . . I always found their names in wallets, newspapers, morgues.

I turned on Bella's computer and it rumbled to life like her truck. I would have to do something on both of those accounts. I tapped my fingers impatiently on her desk as I waiting far too long to connect to the Internet. She would need a modem as well. Otherwise I would never finish in time.

As I waited, glimpses of that winter flashed through my head. The deserted vacation community, the whitewashed windswept cottage, gray waves, gray sky, and sand. Our lives were coated with sand, in our mouths, in the fabric of our clothes. I would lie on my bed and count the grains of sand on the floor, and then count them as they blew in through the cracks in the window frame.

Finally I was connected to the Internet. Robert Bessler. Tracing his lineage was easy enough, but tonight it would take more patience than skill. Tomorrow a new computer and modem would speed the process. I waited, and forced my mind back to that night: The Cotton Club, Duke Ellington's orchestra, my boredom, restlessness, the need to strike out on my own, and the small trickle of blood that sent me running for a back exit. That's when I met him.

He had a single grandchild, Nadine. No other surviving relatives. A credit card number was all it would take to find her address.

The worst part of that memory though, wasn't Robert Bessler; it was the girl's eyes. She offered no thanks, no shrieking, no sobbing, just quiet horror and revulsion registered on her face, mirrored back at me in her wide brown eyes. And almost eighty years later it happened again, that look that acknowledged that there was a monster in the room. The look Bella gave me that confirmed nothing had changed. It was the look that kept me away.

_Nadine Bessler,_

__

Enclosed please find this settlement for the wrongful death of your grandfather, Robert Bessler, in New York City, 1927. I deeply regret your loss.

_Lusus Thriber  
Credit Agricole Suisse, Geneve _

I emailed the letter with instructions to my accountant in Switzerland.

I looked at Bella sleeping soundly and my body ached with longing. Every movement of the life within her drew me in: the rise and fall of her chest, the quiet thumping of her heart, and the way her neck and wrists shook with the rhythm of blood through her veins. I was at her side, brushing my fingertips softly along the skin of her arm. Even with the most delicate touch her body would respond to my caress. The soft downy hairs on her arm would stand erect, as tiny goose bumps shivered, electrified.

Blood rushed to the point of my touch, as if trying to mock me. But it didn't work. What had been so unendurable only a short time ago had changed for me, gradually. She would always smell the same to me, a scent more potent and more important than my own existence. But instead of inciting bloodlust, my body hungered for new desires.

This change didn't register at first. Now, here, next to my Bella asleep on her bed, an altar in so many ways, there was just the smallest trickle of venom in my mouth. While my body was consumed with fire, it was not the burning that used to consume me from my throat down. This fire rose from the core of my being, threatening to engulf us both in its flames.

I had pushed this realization away. I had spent most of my existence mistrusting my impulses, believing them to be a subterfuge for the monster inside. Any physical reaction my body had in response to Bella's presence was suspect in my mind. I had enough reason not to trust myself. That first time, when I told myself I longed to save the girl. She knew better. I stepped toward her and she screamed. I never intended to help her. To justify myself I said that I had protected her. But the next day I found out that I hadn't done that, either.

One by one at night while Bella slept, I traced families, found surviving relatives. One by one letters were sent, simple. Each night, many of these notes were written. I regret your loss, with a donation, something to help them through this lifetime at least. Large sums of money were liquidated. For the names with no living relatives, a foundation was established in their honor, one that would fund a halfway house for rehabilitation. If a monster like myself could be rehabilitated, then certainly any changeable human could.

One by one I made my way to Bella. With each letter written another piece of the monster was behind me. With each name, with each vile death, I put space between myself and that other creature. Because those were the instincts of someone else, one that had the misguided arrogance to judge who should live and die. How little I understood then. For if anything deserved death, wasn't it me? Instead the universe had seen fit that I should find Bella. That was a grace I was only beginning to contemplate, and that might take me an eternity to fully appreciate.

One by one, the days before our wedding passed sweetly. There was new ease between us now that our darkest fears had been confessed openly. There was nothing to hide from one another. And it was a relief. It was easier to smile, and the force of my laughter surprised me. It was easier to touch Bella calmly. She was the only celestial body in my world, and I was able to circle in her orbit effortlessly. She didn't bring up the conversation on the cliff again. But the change must have been evident to her as well. I thought maybe this was why she had been so amenable to the replacement I provided her with when her truck finally expired, taking it in stride.

And each evening I came face to face with my desire. Bella held back, not pushing, as she was wont to do. Again, she was letting me find my way; find my faith perhaps. I couldn't let her know what had changed. I couldn't trust myself if she had that knowledge. Restraining myself with Bella was still the most difficult thing I had ever attempted; only now it was a different restraint.

And although this time with Bella terrified me, it was the most beautiful time I had ever spent on this earth. I loved her human body. I studied the subtle changes in the texture of her skin, her scent, and her taste as we carefully embraced. The rise of her nipples under my fingertips, the warmth and moisture between her legs, calling to me, singing just like her blood.

I wrapped myself in Bella's body; I wanted to be enveloped in her scent. I wanted to take it with me when we were apart. Instead of bringing out a monster, it was my companion in the early morning hours in front of the computer screen, keeping me focused. To bring myself closer to the creature she deserved.

But I held back, of course. There was always the possibility that I might accidentally hurt her. I held her delicately, gently, always on guard, always calculating how much a human could handle. And for that reason, there were certain urges that I denied myself. That one moment without thought was something that I desired completely, and the thing that I feared the most. For while I was driven mad with desire, and desired it more than anything, it was something I was deathly afraid of in Bella's presence. For then all my careful calculations, all of my caution could disappear. And so each night I pulled away, I held us back. But stopping like this just made it harder for the both of us.

And then one night, a week before our wedding, the list was completed. I burned it to ashes. While those names would be etched in my mind for eternity, I felt lighter, for I no longer carried them with me. I didn't know if there was a god, and if there was any absolution for something like myself, but I had finally made my penance. Was I good, like Bella believed? No, I could never concede to that. But maybe I deserved her a little bit more.

Every night I was there in her room. Every night I struggled not to smother her in my embrace. Tonight though, the list behind me as much as it could ever be, tonight felt different.


	15. Arabian Nights

Edward stayed with me each night, but there were boundaries, as he had warned. I knew it was difficult for him, I couldn't imagine how hard. I couldn't imagine any force bigger than the one that was raging in my own body, the desire to have him completely. I hoped that I wasn't only torturing Edward, and that he enjoyed this as well. I hoped that this might make it easier for him, not more difficult. So I didn't push, I tried desperately to hold back and work within the limits of what he could safely handle. I owed him that much.

But each night Edward drove me wild with desire. He was gentle, always handling me tenderly, perhaps overly careful not to hurt me. But his attention was complete, like there was nothing in the room except him and I. He would move slowly over my skin, with his hands, with his mouth. I swear he was studying me, watching what would happen. This drove me wild. But I held back. He could spend twenty minutes enjoying the effect he had on my nipple, and I would die a small death, shuddering, gasping, and hoping for more as his hand and mouth worked their magic there. Trying to be good. Trying not to pull his hand down between my legs. Trying to respect his boundaries. If I showed the slightest sign of being cold, I was often wrapped like a caterpillar in a cocoon. But that didn't stop him from searching out my skin underneath the blanket. He never left, no matter my response.

I wanted to think Edward looked forward to our nightly wedding preparations as much as I did. I wanted to think that he desired me as much as I desired him. I could almost believe it, except that it was Edward that always held back. Something I could never do on my own. Each night when I opened my door he was by my side in an instant. Often he was already in a state of semi-undress, hungry to press his cold skin into mine. Tonight was no different. I fell into his arms almost before the door was safely shut behind us.

He smiled down at me, a playful and pleading look in his eyes. His eyes were always golden caramel lately, hunting often to make sure to keep his thirst at bay. "How is it possible that after each night together I only want you more?" he asked.

"For me too," I said as I softly kissed his waiting lips. "Maybe because each night is always to be continued. Like our own personal One Thousand and One Arabian Nights."

"Is marrying me so distasteful, that you would compare it to Scheherazade's impending death?" I knew he was joking, but there was an edge to his voice.

I put my hands on Edward's shoulders and looked him square in the face to convey the serious undertone to the joke at hand. "I was talking about how each night Scheherazade spent with her husband allowed her to avert death in the end. How each night you spend in this room with me is laying the groundwork for our eternity together."

He looked at me like he was trying to figure something out, a new softness in his eyes. "This is one of those times when I wish I could hear what you're thinking. How could you know that?"

I didn't completely understand, and searched his face for some indication of what he might mean.

But his tone changed and he smiled. "Scheherazade is hardly a perfect comparison," he quipped.

"Has there ever been a perfect comparison for you and I?"

"No, I don't suppose there has. So what story do you have in store for me tonight, my love?"

I trailed both hands from his shoulders over his marble chest and let them rest on his hips. Grasping there I pulled my body against his and I felt a ripple run through his frame. "Seeing as how you can't read my thoughts, I suppose tonight it's a mystery," I chuckled playfully.

"You are always a mystery to me, but one that I'm unraveling slowly, over time."

"Too slowly for my taste," I teased. But I certainly felt somewhat unraveled in his arms as he knotted his hands in my hair and pulled my face to his. His kisses began softly and then grew in intensity as his mouth sought out my ear lobe, my neck and my collarbone. Then with his tongue he lightly traced a path back to my lips. My mouth was poised and ready and greeted his warmly. Our lips parted and I breathed in his scent as our tongues met.

As always, the force or our passion was too much for me. The room suddenly swam and my knees buckled slightly. Edward's arms were instantly around my waist holding me up. I noticed him hesitate for a split second. Each night his pauses were becoming fewer and farther between. Most humans wouldn't notice it at all anymore. But I was completely attuned to him. My breath caught in my throat as I braced for his next move. I knew he was steeling himself to continue.

Then one of his hands moved from my hip, following the edge of my pajama bottoms, until it paused on the drawstrings in front. Closing his eyes and breathing deeply, his hands knotted through the cotton strings. Then his eyes fluttered open and through lids heavy with desire I could see the depth and intensity that was barely held there. He bit his bottom lip. "Is this OK?"

It was all I could do to look him in the eyes and shake my head yes. I couldn't have moved another muscle.

And without another movement the drawstrings on my pants were undone, and they rested lower on my hips. Edward's cold hands moved down to meet them, and he lightly traced a path along their edge. I felt pricks of electricity erupt in response to his touch. I was holding my breath. He pushed my pants a little lower, and he found the waistband of my cotton underwear. He bit his lower lip again. I knew that all it would take was the slightest movement and my pants would fall to the floor. But I was stuck firmly in place, unable to move.

"You're sure?"

I remembered to breathe. "Are you?"

And my pajama bottoms were on the floor at my ankles. Edward's cold hands traced the top edge of my cotton underpants, and then along their seam where my thighs met my bottom. I shivered, but not from the cold, and I worked to steady myself so that Edward didn't flee for a blanket. So I grasped his shoulders more firmly and pulled myself into him for support. His hand gently grasped my bottom and he took a deep breath. Then he moved his hand to the back of my thigh. "I missed the feel of your legs," he said. "I haven't felt them since that night." I stood patiently as he took his time tracing a line from the back of my knee to the edge of my panties. Back and forth, over and over, eliciting sparks that travelled to my toes, and between my legs. My breathing started to turn to heavy sighs, and with the arm that held my waist he pulled me in a little more.

"Am I still going too slowly for you?" he murmured. "Somehow I'm not getting that impression."

Still supporting my weight with one hand around my waist, the other moved across my behind, to my hip and then down along the length of my thigh. With one small motion he lifted me off the floor and brought my body firmly against his. I wound my legs around his waist and pressed myself as closely as I dared. I wanted to take full advantage of this closeness, because this was one of his limits. I knew it would be only a matter of seconds before Edward pulled away.

I pushed my hips into his, and wrapped my legs around him tighter. While Edward's grasp remained gentle, his kisses grew in intensity until I was gasping for air. Again I suppressed a shudder. Electricity ran through my limbs, starting at the points where his hands touched me, on my waist, on the back of my thigh. I took full advantage of this unusual closeness, moving my hips, pushing myself into him. It was going to be over soon, I hoped he wasn't too upset.

But then I felt the smallest movement. Edward shifted his weight so that his hips moved in towards mine ever so slightly. This was all the encouragement I needed. I gasped and pulled myself in to him again and again, pressing my inner thighs against his hard hips. Suddenly underneath me I felt Edward grow, and I could feel the length of him between my legs. A deeper cold radiated from him at this point, and I ran my body over it thrilling at the sensation.

I expected him to pull away, and he did pull his head back from our embrace. I held myself as still as I humanly could and opened my eyes. His were closed. He took in a deep breath through pursed lips, paused, and then opened his eyes. I know Edward didn't believe that he had a soul, but I could have sworn he was bearing his soul to me right there. The look he gave me was so intimate that I was only able to hold it for a second. I looked down to give him privacy. But with one hand he touched my chin to tilt my face up to meet his gaze. Looking into my eyes, his voice was breathless. "I love you." And he slowly moved in to kiss me again.

Our kisses were tentative, but the force that my body was able to muster as it moved against Edward surprised me. Edward crossed the floor. He gently deposited me on the closest surface and freed his hands. He braced his hands on the wall at either side of us. I heard something crackle, and felt a fine dust settle on my face. Only now that he was able to grip something besides me did I feel him move as well, tentatively at first, and then in time with me. My body moved against his instinctually and despite the intense coldness emanating from him, I grew very warm.

I was stunned by this new turn of events and clung to him, panting and pulling Edward impossibly closer. Our breathing was audible as I clutched him, driven, our bodies moving like one, led by startlingly similar instincts. His breathing came deeper, and stronger, until it registered as a low growl that set my body on fire. I dug my nails into his back, trying desperately to obliterate any space between the two of us. Our hips pleaded with one other and I slipped backwards on my perch under the force of Edward's desire. My back came firmly against something cold and smooth. Only then did it register dimly that I was sitting on the windowsill.

Edward's hands were at my collar, his clenched fists were twisted in the straps of my tank top, and he buried his head in my hair. Our breathing was rough and labored. My skin was covered with a thin veil of sweat. My mental faculties were overtaken by the electric current that set each of my nerve endings on fire. All there ever was, was here in this moment, and a low moan escaped from my lips.

I heard a soft growl catch in Edward's throat as his grip on my tank top tightened impossibly, and the muscles on his arms rippled. The three things happened all at once. Edward moaned deeply, his hands shot out sideways to brace himself on the window frame tearing the straps off of my top, and his head fell forward, hitting the corner of the windowpane.

Our breathing was shallow as we collapsed into one another, suddenly loose and relaxed. Plaster rained to the ground from the walls around us, and with a small tinkling sound a jagged crack cut the windowpane in two. I reflexively reached to hold my torn top in place and reluctantly looked into Edward's eyes, unsure about what I might see in their depths.

But his eyes were dancing, with pinpoints of golden light that I had never seen there before, and his smile was unabashed. "Interesting, a mystery indeed," he crooned and nuzzled my ear playfully. I felt him lightly nibble on my earlobe, his lips guarding his teeth. His smile broke into quiet laughter and he picked me up and brought me to the bed, tucking the blanket between us.

"Well I kind of threw the 'to be continued' out the window that time. What could I possibly offer to keep you coming back now?" I joked, smiling openly at his beaming face.

"Now you could never keep me away," he corrected, pulling my body into his and kissing me warmly. "But now I feel for Scheherazade, the pressure is intense."

"Funny, this is one of the few times since we've met where I can't sense any pressure between us at all." We held each other, laughing, and it was so easy in this moment. Chuckling in each other's arms, kissing lightly, letting our hands run over each other's bodies without any urgency. I smiled up at Edward, but then watched a shadow flit across his brow. "OK, no, I take that back. Pressure returned."

"Bella, I think we have to be more careful, that's all. What if that windowpane shattered and fell onto you?"

"OK, OK, no glass. Got it. But that's on you, I didn't even know where I was!"

"It's more than that Bella. It took all of my strength to keep from tearing off all of your clothes just now and taking you completely," he said as he played with the ragged straps of my tank top that had fallen to the bed.

My heart sped and I was suddenly thrilled, unsatisfied and disappointed all at once. "I wouldn't have minded," I replied.

But my brain raced ahead of my emotions and quickly registered something significant. I looked up to meet Edward's gaze. "That's all? It took all of your strength not to make love to me?" Did he really mean that, or was he just leaving out other urges to protect me?

Edward looked like he was intentionally holding back. But then a smile washed over his face and his eyes lit with joy. "No, nothing else. Not a thought. No other impulse but to make you mine." His eyed smoldered, but then he closed them and took a breath.

With his eyes still closed he said, "Bella, we're on a precipice, one that I don't want to breech. We agreed to draw lines, no regrets. Let's rein it in a bit. For me?"

I sighed, resigned. "Uh huh," I pouted.

"But maybe," he opened his eyes, still smoldering beneath his lashes, and he looked up to meet my gaze, "maybe I can keep the ending just as satisfying, for you?" Our lips met and his kiss was strong and sure. I wound my arms around him and my torn top slipped. Edward's hands were gently on my breasts, teasing my nipples. I moved my hands underneath his shirt, pulling it up so that I could lean my naked torso into his. I moved my mouth from his lips to his ear and sucked and nipped at his earlobe, one hand searching him out under the covers.

But Edward shifted and pulled away. "Bella."

"Sorry."

"I can't trust either of us right now. Tomorrow?" But he wasn't upset and chuckled, still smiling.

"I don't know if I can wait until tomorrow," I gasped.

"I think we may have the roles reversed here. It's I that must come to you each night, keeping alive my chances of having you finally marry me."

"No, that's backward too. You couldn't stop me from marrying you now." I surprised myself with the earnestness of that statement. Edward sat back from me slightly and stared with wide eyes.

"Bella, you don't have to say – "

"Edward, I couldn't lie that well. You know that." And he brought my body to his, kissing me firmly on the lips.

"Thank you," he breathed.

"Maybe there's something else we can do tonight, Bella. There's a story I'd like to tell you. Perhaps I identify with Scheherazade after all. This one is different, though, and it's never been told before. Not another mystery, but a horror story turned romance." Edward pulled the blanket closer to me, and wrapped his arms around me. "Close your eyes my love."

I sighed, but just a look at Edward was enough to melt away any resistance on my part. His eyes were pinpoints of liquid sunshine on melted butter. I had never seen anything so beautiful as his eyes right now. His impossibly gentle embrace calmed me, and I was happy to lie next to him and listen to the music that the deep notes of his voice created. I would listen to whatever he had to say. I took one more look at his face, and then closed my eyes as I nestled my head into his chest. "OK."

"Before I met you Bella, I was a monster hiding in the shell of a man." This was an unexpected start and I opened my eyes to look at Edward. He stroked my cheek.

"Shh, love. Let me tell the story."

I hated when Edward spoke of himself in such disparaging terms. But one look at his pleading eyes and I gave in, settling my head against his chest again.

"My decision to abstain from murder was a clinical one, one that could be reasoned to be just and right. But justice was only a word. Beauty was a word too, melody was a sound, and harmony was it's mathematical inverse. Everything was gray and meaningless without my love for you. When I met you Bella, you made me confront the monster that I was. I was walking in the cloak of civility, a wolf in sheep's clothing, that had begun believing rather naively that I was the sheep. You stripped me and made me realize that the monster was always there."

"You may be human and a bit accident prone my dear, but you were the only person that could vanquish that monster within me. In nearly one hundred years you were the only thing that was able to really change me. My love for you turned beauty into something I could feel and turned music into song. It gave not only a reason, but a purpose to every choice and every decision I made. It took me from observer of this world to participant, someone that wanted to change things so they would be better, for you. I felt happiness, I saw beauty, and I heard music for the first time."

"The longer I am by your side, the more my heart has been uncovered. At first I didn't believe it was there. But then there was an ache, and little by little you brought it out, uncovered more of my human heart. Bella, when you came back to me after I left you, I was made whole. When you agreed to by my wife I was better, complete. Tonight my dear, my heart has been laid bare. There is nothing between my heart and your hand." And with that he laid my hand on his chest, and held it there in a tight embrace.

"So you see, when you say you have nothing to give me, your words are absurd. You have given me more than I could ever have hoped for. You have made a monster into more of a man. Anything I could give to you is nightmare and shadow in comparison."

He had been whispering in my ear, his breath tickling the hair along my neckline. I realized my eyes were wet, and I turned to gaze at Edward. His eyes were gentle and soft, still alit with golden sparks of light.

"Our story Bella may be the best story that has ever been told." He lowered his head to mine and kissed my lips lightly. "Now it's time for sleep, my love."

But I shook my head, struggling to tell him what that meant to me. I wanted to convey the love I felt for him right now. I opened my mouth to speak, but couldn't find the words to start.

"Shh," he put his finger to my lips. "It's OK. Sometimes you don't have to say anything darling, for me to know your heart. Everything I need to hear I can see in your face." Edward paused as he peered deeply into my eyes and I was surprised at how calmly I was able to look right back at him. My home, my forever. Edward sighed. I didn't think his look could get any more open, any more penetrating, but it did. Finally my heart came back to life and fluttered.

"It's done. I can believe now, Bella. Rest knowing that you have brought peace to a monster's heart, forever."

* * *

**I'm working hard on finishing this, but it's been hard to swing back and forth between Forks and Saudi Arabia. I have to get to the Cullens stranded in the desert, no matter how much I love writing about Bella and Edward. So please bare with me!**

**In the meantime, please review. I'd love to hear what you think. Thanks for reading! Marie**


	16. Discovery

Sakhmet eyed me, and a warm and gentle wave of desire washed over my body. I could think of nothing else. I lusted for a mouth, a body, any mouth, and any body. Her mouth.

No.

Breathe. Breathe.

In order to dispel the desire that Sakhmet threw at me, I had to project feelings outward. I conjured the strongest feeling that I knew, my love for Alice. I thought of Alice's eyes, her face. There was no one else for me except Alice. Alice. She filled the room. I breathed deeply and started to settle back into my body.

But then I gasped. Lust cut like a dagger to my core, coming from outside myself, from across the room. This was no gentle wave; it was sharp and painful. I squeezed my eyes shut again. Alice. Alice would see this, she would know. I didn't want Sakhmet to torture her too. And with that thought I was overtaken with anger, and venom filled my mouth. Sakhmet could hurt me all she wanted, but I didn't want her fucking with Alice. I pictured myself across the room, ripping Sakhmet, tearing her to shreds, sinking my teeth into her granite flesh.

But then I heard a low hiss, and emotions from outside my body joined the anger. And then it flashed through my mind; me sinking my teeth into her granite flesh and anger and lust intermingling with one another. Something I hadn't felt since Maria.

Breathe.

Alice.

Lust.

Damn it!

Anger.

Anger.

Intense anger.

I was on my feet, panting. I didn't know I had gotten up. I opened my eyes and Sakhmet stood ten paces from me, grinning.

"I am winning." She took another slow step in my direction.

I couldn't say anything. I needed to keep my mouth closed to keep from acting on these warring emotions. I was shredded into too many pieces, barely holding them together. But walking toward me like this she was asking for a fight. I would not let her chase me around the room for two days. I would attack. Again anger flared, venom pooled in my mouth and I heard a snarl catch in my throat. I would take my hands and wrap them around her neck and . . . Desire struck me. No, I would not bite her breast while I wound my hands around her throat. Sakhmet bared her teeth, my anger easily flowing toward her.

She took another step in my direction.

Oh God, Alice. My brain begged for her. Alice, I want you here to make this better Alice. I want to hold your hand, just hold your hand right now.

I told Emmett I'd been through worse. I don't know if I had been in greater peril, but worse didn't begin to describe what I was before I had Alice. Alice accepted me, loved me, and was the only thing in this world that understood me completely. But I was holding onto my resolve by a thread here, just a thread holding me to what I wanted to be. I wanted to be rational, compassionate, and safe, together with my love forever. Alice grounded me. But now I was like a compass needle missing its true north. I was dangerous. I was unstable without her. I was violent, physically strong, and yet emotionally weak.

I thought about Alice and pushed this feeling across the room with all the force I could muster. I thought of her face, the way it fit in my hands, the way her small mouth fit against mine. I thought of her delicate hands, her tiny waist, the way she danced when she walked. I thought about how I could never surprise her, and how that made so many things easier and more annoying all at once. The way my life had fallen into place after she was in it. I breathed deeper and felt my muscles relax, no longer at war.

There was no anger now, no lust. I looked up at Sakhmet and her eyes were wide and soft. As soft as violent bright red eyes could ever be. She blinked. I wondered why, there was no earthly reason she would have to blink in front of me. But then it hit me, my love. No, this wasn't right. But I needed Alice to get me through this. I couldn't let go of her. I swore I would never let go of her.

Damn Bella and Edward for this. What the hell had I been thinking, leaving Alice like this? Travelling half way around the world and running around the desert like some nutty vampire with a mission. Who the hell did I think I was, Tom fucking Cruise in a new Mission Impossible movie? This was disgusting. I just wanted to go back to my happy life. I wanted to find Alice and take her in my arms, then take her in other places. Alice.

I felt my arousal and there it was again, lust hitting me hard so that my body shuddered. If love was inappropriate and anger was out, then maybe we would have to settle on lust. I just had to keep my mind on Alice. Sakhmet couldn't read my thoughts, just my feelings. I thought of Alice. Alice, Alice, until she filled the room again. Would Alice know this already? Would she mind?

So I let my mind go, embracing the feeling from within and without, and focusing it on my mate. I thought of Alice and her small, slender body. I conjured up the way she felt under my hands, and the way it felt when she touched me. I was on fire and groaned. I was being helped along by outside forces. I opened my eyes. Sakhmet seemed overly pleased with herself, her lids heavy and an evil smile playing at the corners of her mouth. I had to force my eyes shut again and intentionally switch my mind back to Alice. How Alice would stay by my side, in my bed every night, all night. Her sly smile when she would know what I was about to do a millisecond before I did.

The emotions in the room were escalating. It felt like the lust was palpable, it had a physical presence, I was suddenly going to choke on it. I could no longer concentrate on what was mine and what was Sakhmet's and it didn't matter. My body was at war with itself. The lust for blood and sex that pervaded the room was staggering. It took all my strength to keep me seated across the room from her, to keep my eyes off of her, and to keep me from getting up and just walking over to her.

That's when the door opened and a small thin brown man stumbled into the room. He fell to his knees, catching himself with his hands, shaking and covered with a thin film of dust and sweat. He had scraped his knees falling, and I could smell his blood. I tasted the venom in my mouth before desire registered in my brain. But when the desire hit me, it was from without and I realized it wasn't my emotion at all. I could feel the anxiety roll off of the man in waves as he scrambled to his feet and struggled to get his bearings. His eyes worked to adjust to the dim light, his heart pounded wildly, until he saw Sakhmet across the room.

*

OK, so here's the thing. I was right. I was right all along. I said that nothing good would come of this Edward and Bella thing. I said it from the beginning. I said it was putting all of us in danger, and that it could ruin our way of life. And here we are: prisoners in isolation in the desert, waiting to desperately fight a bunch of other vampires that we have nothing against.

And really, this isn't the worst of it. It started with James. Don't even get me started about facing an army and fighting with dogs. And there was the whole six months in Denali episode. That was the worst, because it tore my family apart. Edward was gone and wouldn't even answer his phone, Esme was miserable, and Alice was always fighting with Carlisle. I knew that if Alice found Bella dead she wasn't coming back. I knew it. She would send for Jasper and that would be it. Our family would be finished. But she wouldn't go if Edward came back. That's why I called.

Anyway, now the Volturi is after us and we've got the wolves breathing down our necks waiting for Edward to change Bella. None of this chaos is ending anytime soon.

But no one steps in to say, "You know Rosalie, you were right about Bella." I get it though. I'm not dense. She is Edward's. But I didn't see that at first. I mean Edward didn't want her to be a vampire and he didn't seem to have any physical interest in her except to eat her. What am I supposed to think? I wouldn't want to exist for a day without Emmett – and I don't just want him around to talk to, if you know what I mean. But of course, Edward's actions are supposed to mean that he loves her so much more. Leave it to Edward to do things all backwards like that.

Like I said, I get it now. Bella is his. It clicked for me when I noticed how happy Edward was even in the midst of the whole newborn army uprising last month. He was freaking overjoyed. And he stayed with her. Not one other time in all the years we've been a family has Edward not stood by us. Bella is his.

And I'll admit it. I feel somewhat responsible for all of this. If I never called Edward in Rio he wouldn't have gone to the Volturi. It's the only reason they care about us right now. I did that. And I don't even want to think what would happen if Bella died now. It would be the end of the family. I saw that first hand last year. So, I'm going to deal with it. I may have been right, but sometimes that doesn't matter, I guess. And sometimes you have to be big enough to let that go. That's what I'm going to do.

So I will do whatever it takes to get Emmett, Jasper and I out of this intact. I will do whatever it takes to make the Volturi leave Bella alone. I will do whatever it takes to make sure Bella is alive, happy, with Edward. I know no one will believe that, and that's fine. But it is what it is. I just want a happy existence. That may be kind of gone for now, but it would be worse if Bella were out of the picture. So here I am. Doing whatever I can.

I saw the way Chun-Tao and Dong-Mei could move. I can do that too. They said it took a woman to fight a dragon, well I don't know anyone more womanly than I am. I can do this. So I'll meditate like they showed us. I can do this better than either of the boys. And I'll get us out of this and get us home.

*

This wasn't so bad. Sure, there was a grim, menacing vampire that I had recently attempted to kill staring at me, one that obviously wanted me dead. I wondered if he would try. I would have to keep my guard up, that much was obvious.

But this really wasn't too bad. I just had to focus and center myself and try to get into that state of heightened awareness. I hadn't even known we could be more hyper-aware than we already were, until just recently. I was pretty pleased, all things considered, that I'd met up with Chun-Tao and Dong-Mei. I felt so absolutely strong and in control of my body. I couldn't wait to get back to Edward and Carlisle and show them this.

I thought about what a mess Edward was the day we had to leave Forks. How could a guy be so happy and be such a mess all at once? Only Edward could do that, I think. I came into the family just a few years after he gave up feeding on humans. The guy was plagued by guilt, and hated himself for what he'd done. I figured it would fade with time, how could you blame him, right? And while he didn't think about it night and day anymore, he never seemed to like himself any better.

I never minded what I was. I never thought better or worse of myself. I didn't want to die, and now I was alive, sort of. And I had Rose too, which was better than anything I could ask for. I could take anything if I had Rose.

But I remembered what Dong-Mei asked, "Did I know myself?" Because clearly I wasn't doing all this for Rose. And then the ferocity of the love I had for all of my family hit me like a ton of bricks. Of course, I had known it was there. But the protective feeling I had for Edward, and for Bella, was suddenly unleashed full force on my consciousness. I guess I had been acting under it all along without understanding why. I would lay my life on the line for them, for Bella, a human. That was weird.

Again my mind flitted to Edward. He was so troubled that day before we left, he actually groaned. I laughed then, but I'd do just about anything to erase that trouble. Alice hinted that this trip was necessary for that to happen. I hoped she was right. I hoped this worked.

I sat and tried to meditate. I was the strongest vampire I knew. I had mad fighting skills now. I was the best vampire to do this for my family. I wouldn't fail them.

I heard a snarl from across the room. My eyes shot open and I was on my feet. Valentino was across the room in seconds and with a backhanded swipe to my neck I was knocked against the wall before I could move. Well, I wouldn't fail my family unless Valentino stopped me.

*

Sakhmet stood slowly, and I felt desire hit me again like a tidal wave. This time though, the lust for blood was matched equally with physical desire, and I shuddered. I hadn't felt desire to feed off of a human like this in many years, long before Alice and the rest of my family. I worked to stay rooted to my spot, but the man was already in motion, walking with urgency toward the vampire.

I wanted to stop him, to get in his way, but I knew that if I moved I would just try to take him for myself. It's something Sakhmet suspected as well. That's why I was here. I knew it now. She didn't believe I could change. I don't know if I believed I could change, or if anyone in my family believed it either, for that matter. Well, no, Alice always believed in me. Had we all been betting against Alice, then?

I grounded myself, using a technique Dong-Mei taught to make sure I stayed rooted to my spot. I kept my breathing deep and even, knowing that what I was attempting was most likely impossible.

I don't know if the prisoner had even seen me. He wouldn't see me coming. He wouldn't know what killed him.

Nerve endings danced to life along my arms and legs, I swallowed the venom that filled my mouth and I held my breath completely. I wished I couldn't hear him walk across the room to meet her. I wished I couldn't hear the sounds of rough cloth against skin. Then moans, whimpers, a breath caught in a throat. I felt like I was boiling, like I would scream. But instead I was sitting cross-legged, allowing the qi to flow through my body in the pattern that I had been taught, one hundred and eight times, then over again, then over again.

Licking, kissing, shuddering, scratching, I tried to breathe and let it go. I could feel energy like heat underneath my skin, but as I moved it in a circuit, it would calm and become even. Thoughts floated into and out of my brain. Alice, Carlisle, the mist on the ledge above the Straight, the way the damp heat of the Gulf clung to my face as a human, each thought left to drift on a river as I let it go.

But then I smelled blood, and there was a cry of fear and pain. My mouth was awash in venom, my fingers curled into a fist. I was on my feet without thinking; quicker than even I knew was possible. My eyes were open, and the picture in front of me took up the entirety of my vision. Two naked figures, one was dark ebony, one was chalky white, a neat puncture wound, blood trickling onto the floor. But it was his look that froze me, the wild look of desire mixed with dread in the human's eyes. And the emotions of Sakhmet hit me again, no longer desire, or pleasure, but boredom. Her eyes were dead as she sated her thirst.

I was overwhelmed by the physical desire to join her, to lap up the spilled drops of blood, to push her away to get the last of the warm flow from the human's veins. But stronger than physical desire, was a revulsion that had set root and in my mind. And searching myself I realized that I felt empathy, perhaps. Not as much for the human that had never had a chance, but for Sakhmet, confined to this lonely wasteland, playing god with humans.

I sat again, sad for the loss of another human life, but relieved, and stunned. No one had to stop me from drinking blood but myself. I was not this monster, not this time. We had all bet against Alice.

Again, I let the qi move through my dead body, faster, more effortlessly, changing from dark red, to blue, to gold, spinning faster with each revelation through my body, opening my head to heaven, and rooting my body to the earth. I centered myself, centered my body, kept myself on the floor in the corner and refused to meet her glance, no matter how much my body commanded me to do it. There was nothing she could do to me now.

*

I was back on my feet instantly and Valentino was moving towards me again. I didn't have to think, I just stepped out of the way an instant before he would have struck me. Instead he hit the wall with such force that one of the beams fell from the ceiling.

He turned, his nostrils flared and his eyes were an angry red. This time his approach was less predictable and so was I. Again he hit the wall. I was in the opposite corner.

I smiled a little reflexively. This was a real fight, and I was really getting the chance to use what I had learned. It was amazing and I felt completely alive.

But my smile didn't lighten the heart of my combatant. This time he lunged for me. That actually made things easier, because you can't change your trajectory in mid-leap. I stepped out of the way almost calmly, grabbed his body in mid-flight and flung it into the wall. Another beam fell from the ceiling. If we kept this up I imagined I would eventually be able to leap through the roof.

He moved slowly to get up. He shook himself and turned to face me. "It's too bad you won't be able to see what I do to Rosalie after you are dead."

Something popped in my head. I would kill him. I'd done it once before. I would tear him to small pieces and burn this goddamned room. Now we were running toward each other. His hands met my throat and I jumped, using his body as leverage, and we were airborne. Then I kicked my feet underneath me, so that they hit his chest and we fell to the floor with force. I was standing on top of him now, and he was lying on his back.

It was the end for him. I put my foot on his neck and bore down.

But then, the door opened. Jane walked in and ran her eyes between myself and the vampire pinned beneath me. She didn't react. "It is time." That said, she stepped back so that I could leave.

With one quick kick to Valentino's head I was out the door and running for the main courtyard. It was empty, no one, nothing was there. My thoughts ranged wildly. Where were Rose and Jasper? Had something happened to them? Was this a set-up? I spun around, panicking; half waiting for the three Volturi vamps to come and try to finish me off.

But then, from behind me, I heard Rose. "Emmett!"

I spun around and she was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. It was like I was seeing her for that first time all over again. Her golden blond locks were streaming behind her as she ran towards me.

"Rose!" I caught her up in an enormous hung and found her lips with my mouth. I had never been so happy to have her with me before. Time stopped as we held onto each other, pulling our bodies into one another, relieved and excited all at once.

Rose pulled away too soon. "Emm, where's Jasper?"

I hadn't thought of my brother since I saw Rose. We looked around, suddenly frightened. Anything could have happened with Sakhmet. "Jasper!" Rose called. "Jasper!"

"What?" We turned to see Jasper standing calmly just behind us. Instead of the withdrawn shell I had come to expect, Jasper was grinning from ear to ear. "What's up guys? You ready to fight some baby vampires or what?"

"Oh my God. Jasper what happened in there? You actually look amazing."

"It would take a long time to explain. More time than we have. Are you guys ready?"

"Let's do this!" I was startled by Rose's enthusiasm. Rose was more gung-ho than she had been this entire trip. It looked like she was savoring the idea of this fight. Huh, that was a new turn of events too.

"Well, they're not here in the courtyard. Why don't we check out the surrounding area from the top of the wall?" I suggested, still holding Rose's hand. She grinned up at me, and Jasper still had a smile plastered on his face. "We can do this," we all seemed to scream silently at one another. Then this would all be over and we could go home.

The three of us took a running leap and landed easily on the wall that separated Sakhmet's compound from the surrounding desert.

And then we saw them. We saw them all. They were surrounding the compound, waiting as if for some command. They wore rags, torn and dirty tunics. A communal snarl rang out as we looked down at them. There weren't six, or seven or ten vampires in front of Jasper, Rosalie and I. Fifteen vampires looked up at us and crouched, waiting for a fight.


	17. Reversal

**By popular demand, another Bella and Edward chapter. . . This chapter contains direct quotes from Twilight, as always, I don't own these quotes, and I don't claim them as my own. The Twilight saga and all original characters are Stephenie Meyer's, and I'm forever grateful to her for having written them! This chapter isn't PG-13 - be warned.**

* * *

"How do you like your food, Edward?"

Edward managed a polite smile. "It's lovely."

Luckily vampire reflexes worked faster than the human eye could detect. Later I'd have to ask him were his steak was disappearing to.

"You're pretty hungry Bells," Charlie observed. I was doing my best to eat what was on my plate and generously sample Edward's lunch as well.

I smiled stiffly. "Nerves, I guess."

Charlie had been trying to make up for missing brunch for weeks now. It was easy to find reasons to avoid another shared meal, with the upcoming wedding, Jacob's disappearance, and at least twenty other excuses that could be randomly inserted when needed. I steered clear of the most obvious reason, that Edward preferred fresh blood to food.

But with just three days until the wedding, there were fewer and fewer chances to spend time with my dad. It was the way he asked yesterday that made it impossible to say no. During our usually silent breakfast Charlie said, "Bells, your mom's coming in soon with Phil, and then you're going to be married. Let me take my little girl and her fiancé out to eat, just the three of us. Before I never see you again."

He didn't know how true that statement was. I said yes with tears in my eyes.

The waiter came over to top off our glasses. He definitely noticed that Edward's glass hadn't needed refilling the entire meal. I thought about drinking from Edward's glass, but decided that would just look strange. I guess there weren't as many places to stash water and a Coke in a flash.

I looked warily out the large front window. The sun had been going in and out of the clouds all morning. One minute it was sunny and bright, the next it was like a different day, overcast, with a chill in the air. Days like today were typical for summer in the northwest, and it made life for vampires somewhat difficult. We timed our arrival perfectly, based on Alice's predictions. We worked to get a table in the corner toward the back just in case. Right now the sun was filtering through patchy clouds. Then we'd have about forty-five minutes to get out of here and get Charlie home.

If the food and the sun were making Edward edgy, I couldn't tell. My fiancé had been unflaggingly happy for the past two days. It had been coming on for a while, ever since our talk on the cliff over Port Angeles. But this unabashed delight was new. As if to emphasize my thoughts, Edward slyly squeezed my knee under the table and flashed me a breathtaking smile. Would I really be married to this creature in four days? I hoped so.

Lunch winded down. Charlie settled into an awkward silence. I noticed poorly hidden disgust on Edward's face as he pushed the remainder of the steak around on his plate. Yep, lunch with the two men I loved most in the world. I smiled despite it all and watched gladly as a thick blanket of clouds drifted in from the west. That was our cue.

I pulled my sweater tightly around myself as we made our way to the Volvo. Dressing in layers was mandatory on days like today. One minute it was intolerably hot, the next a cold wind was blowing in from off the coast. So today I mixed winter and summer garments. Alice would never forgive an outfit like mine. I had on a knee length A-line linen skirt with a white summer eyelet lace button-down top. Over that I wore a baggy pumpkin-colored cardigan of indiscriminate material. I took absurd pleasure in my slightly dowdy appearance, knowing that Alice would imminently have much more power over my wardrobe choices.

"Anything in particular you want to do?" I asked after Edward and I dropped Charlie home. I was all too aware that we had only about fifteen hours before Renee and Phil made their appearance.

"Absolutely," he said, leaning over to kiss me with an unmistakably suggestive look in his eyes. "But we have to be out of sight. We have about thirty minutes of cloud cover left."

Edward started the engine. I knew where we were going as soon as he pulled up the forest road. He didn't bother waiting for me to hike the five miles, and I didn't want to wait either. He got us to our destination in under two minutes.

We walked into the meadow hand in hand. "That first day we spent here was like a dream," I said looking into Edward's eyes, "a beautiful dream."

"Even if I could dream, I don't believe my mind could have conjured up anything so perfect." He took my face in his hands. His eyes were a gentle gold, brighter every successive day he fed. I wondered if they would turn sunshine yellow if he kept this up.

Then, repeating his exact motions from that afternoon, like only someone with a photographic memory could, Edward laid one hand on my neck, brushed my cheek with the other, and then held my face in both of his hands as he rested his head in the hollow of my throat. I was very still, and the same thrill ran through my body as he gently moved his hands from my face, down my neck, and laid them to rest on my shoulders. The sweetness of that moment was still the same, but the fear I had felt that spring afternoon was noticeably absent.

At that moment the sun came out. I marveled at my luck, having this creature hold me in his arms and love me. "Alice saw the possibility that I might take your life here that day. But I couldn't. It changed for me then; it was the first of many changes." And he moved his head to rest over my heart. I watched the reflection of his skin change as clouds flitted over the sun.

A chilly breeze blew in with the new clouds and I shivered. Edward, always conscious of my comfort, moved back, "I brought something," he said, pulling his iPod out of his pocket. He put one earphone in his ear and one in mine. A rich, complex melody overlaid with horns surged through the earpiece. "I always loved this song, but I could never relate. It was too blissful, and it hurt me to listen to it. Now I can listen and think of you, of us. It's something I do often lately."

Edward brushed my hair behind my ears. "The first time I mentioned love to you was here. I thought I might push you away or overwhelm you. Maybe I hoped I would, I was so frightened of what you might think."

"No, I clung to that word. I couldn't believe it."

"And so the lion fell in love with the lamb." Edward murmured again. He held my chin in his hand and kissed me gently. Pulling back just enough so that his lips brushed mine he smiled as he said, "What a stupid lamb."

I kissed him back. "What a sick, masochistic lion," I said, grinning broadly.

And we knelt in front of each other and leaned in for a kiss. Our eyes were open, and I could see the tears in my eyes reflected back in Edward's golden gaze.

"I didn't dare dream . . . this, someday . . . you," he murmured.

"I did."

Edward put his arms around my shoulders and kissed me. They were delicate, indulgent, long kisses. We slowly collapsed to the ground together, still kissing. His hands ranged over my body, and then returned to run through my hair.

"You are the only beautiful thing that has happened to me in my long existence, better than I could ever have hoped."

We both lay partially on our backs, gently clasping arms around one another, kissing softly. The song ended.

"Play it again. Please."

And this time as the song started I kissed him full and forcefully on the mouth, but still slowly, savoring every moment. I didn't hesitate in any of my movements. The trust I felt with Edward was now absolute. I pulled myself on top of him, and relaxed into his cold body. I let my hands caress his face, down to his neck and his shoulders.

"The next morning, when you said, 'You are my life now,' that changed everything for me."

"It was true."

"I knew."

My hands were over his chest. I let my head and my hand rest over where his heart used to stir. "My life. My love. My forever." The song ended again and I took the earpiece out of my ear.

Soft rain started falling. He pushed me to sitting. "Should we go?"

"No. Please."

And as he looked at me I saw something change in his eyes, and they flashed with desire. His hands were at my shoulders and they pulled off my cardigan. My white cotton button down was getting quickly soaked with rain. One by one, slowly, Edward unbuttoned my shirt. I could feel his arousal beneath me. I stayed very still as he peeled off the wet top.

He sat up and I folded my legs around his hips. Edward kissed me gently from my wrist, up my arm, to my shoulder. He brought his hands around my back and easily undid the bra clasp there. He held his hands still, not letting my bra fall. I put one hand over my breasts, and with the other I reached around to intertwine my fingers with his. I guided one of his hands down to my side. He moved his other hand to gently hold my waist.

"Are you sure?"

"Are you?"

It was our cue, and we smiled a silly smile at one another. I lowered my bra and breathed deeply as I felt warm raindrops fall on my bare breasts. Edward's mouth was on my breast in an instant. I recognized the feel of his teeth protected by his lips, as he nipped and sucked there. He sought out my other breast with his hand. I closed my eyes; this was always too much. It would take me an eternity to get used to this.

Then he wound his arms around me, and pulled my body into his, his hard lips crushing mine in his kiss. He was like water and ice, the rain streaming over his solid features as smoothly as over stone.

"Edward, I want to feel your body against mine, please," I begged tugging at his summer sweater. He didn't need any more prompting. His shirt was torn off of his body like tissue paper, and he pulled me in again. The feel of my breasts against his wet icy skin was enough to set all of my nerve endings on fire. We both ran our hands along each other's backs, our lips never leaving the other's mouth. It was like pressing myself against a monument, against the edge of a cliff, but one that was pulling me in as well.

And then his hands were on my bottom, and were very gently pulling me towards him. I felt him, long and very cold, between my legs. His hands relaxed, then pulled in again. Oh. My. God. Edward had never initiated anything like this before, ever. I responded automatically, rubbing myself up against him. It was hard to continue kissing as my breathing became fitful and labored. My heart was beating in an unlikely pattern as well. I knew he felt it hammering against his chest.

Then his cold hands were on my thighs, under the edge of my skirt, tracing some unknown pattern there, moving higher with each rotation. Finally they hit the edge of my panties, and he traced the edge back toward my behind. His hands rested there, over my dampening underwear and he gently pulled me in again.

I thought I might explode. I had hoped that this was something Edward actually wanted. I had tried to pretend that he wasn't just going along with me. But now he was asking. I was floored. My head was spinning and my breathing was erratic. The rain only seemed to intensify the infectious scent wafting off of him. I had to stop myself. I pulled away, closed my eyes and took a breath.

Suddenly I realized that I was reenacting Edward's standard move. I couldn't hide the smile from my lips.

"Bella, I'm sorry. I, I – I didn't . . ."

I loved that he couldn't find the words to explain himself. It was so human, and so touching, and I understood him completely. I'm sure it was how I felt each time we embraced and went too far.

"No, don't apologize! I just needed a second."

I could tell by his look that he wasn't sure if he trusted my excuse.

"You're OK?"

"Better than OK." I experimentally moved myself against him, purposefully meeting his glance. Then I leaned in to lightly brush my lips against his, letting my nipples gently rub his chest.

"You're incorrigible." His arms were around me again, and we were moving against each other again. This time I was prepared and didn't stop.

Edward tipped me back and gently laid me on the ground. I looked up to see his bronze hair hanging in wet waves in his eyes, water streaming over his face, and across his chest. I took a deep involuntary breath. "You are so beautiful," I said in a whisper, without thinking.

"Not compared to you," Edward responded, raking his eyes over my body. "You know I love you?"

"Of course. And you know I love you," I added.

Edward's eyes lit up, golden flecks swimming in sunshine, "I do," he smiled. "Do you know how long I've wanted this?" he asked, lowering himself onto my bare chest.

"No." I said easily. "I only hoped."

He pulled his face to mine and his eyes were desperately intense. "I couldn't let you know. I couldn't trust myself."

"But now?"

"Faith?"

"What changed?"

"I did."

This was all said between kisses, as he gently rubbed the length of himself against me, sending shock waves through my body. I couldn't speak anymore, and I tried to pull him closer.

"Bella, I still have to be careful. I could never forgive myself if I hurt you."

"Let me show you how careful you have to be," I asked, grasping his hips and pulling them toward mine. And he let me. I moaned.

"Isabella," Edward hissed.

And one of his hands moved up the length of my thigh and gently held my hip too. His fingers wrapped themselves through the band of my panties and he gently tugged. He stopped himself and looked up, but before he could say anything I pre-empted him, "Are you?" was all I said, with what I hoped was a seductive look in my eyes.

Edward's mouth was on mine, his tongue was in my mouth, my panties were at my ankles, and all that was between myself and the rest of the world, was my rain-drenched linen skirt. Edward wasn't letting that get in the way.

My breath was coming and going in fits and starts and my heart was hammering in my head. A cool and hesitant hand felt its way up my inner thigh. Edward sat back again, and pulled me onto his lap. "It feels safer if you lead, I don't want to hurt you."

How could I say no to that? I couldn't. I held his face in my hands as I kissed him deeply. He wound one arm around my bare back, and with the other he was under my skirt, holding my bare hip. I was a spark, a flame; I was detached from my body and more aware of it than ever before. I stopped thinking and my body took over. My hand moved down Edward's chest and sought out the button of his jeans. I felt the deep growl rumble through his chest before it's sound registered in my mind. He immediately took his hands off of me and clenched them at his side.

Edward pulled away from my mouth just long enough to whisper, "Bella, I need you to tell me that we should wait." And then his lips were back on my mouth. What he said was so low and so quick, and my mind wasn't exactly working, so it didn't fully register. I gave up on the wet button and felt for his fly. He pulled away again, "You have to tell me to wait right now, or we won't." And then he pressed his mouth to mine and wound his hands in my hair.

Wait? I didn't want to wait. We were getting married in four and a half days. I couldn't wait.

But no, this was Edward, my Edward. Waiting until marriage meant the world to him. I had to marshal every once of willpower I could find. I took a second to savor the feel of him against me, the pressure of his erection against me, and then in a shaky and breathless voice I said it.

"Edward, we should wait."

They were the magic words. He relaxed his embrace. I was the masochist this time and pulled my arms around him closer, but settled for tucking my head into his chest. I tried to catch my breath.

Edward's hands were still knotted in my wet hair, but it was a more relaxed gesture somehow. "Thank you," he said quietly in my ear.

"Don't mention it?" I had half a mind to take it back. I looked up at Edward, "What happened to reining it in?"

He looked sheepishly down at me, and ran his hand though his wet and tousled hair. A tingling sensation ran over the length of my body. "Would you understand what I meant if I said I was only human?"

The change of context from the first time Edward asked me this question wasn't lost on me.

"Bella, I told you I didn't trust myself to tell you how I felt. After a century or so, some self-knowledge is a given."

I sighed. My breathing was steady now, even if my heart was still hammering in my chest.

"Really my love, four days isn't that long." I didn't know if he was trying to convince himself or me. Four days seemed like a couple lifetimes to me right now. But when I thought about what awaited me afterwards, what seemed almost guaranteed now, I blushed.

Edward misread my blushing and gently lifted me off of his lap to look for my clothes. My modesty took a minute to catch up with the rest of me, and I suddenly thought some cloth between myself and the forest might not be such a bad idea. I was grateful when he handed me all of my loose articles of clothing. But one look at my wet, bedraggled undergarments and I shivered.

Edward grinned mischievously. "No, you're right, I think you'll have to do without these." And he tucked my bra and panties into his back pocket.

My eyes must have been as large as saucers. "Who are you, and what did you do to my fiancé?" I laughed a little as I pulled on my soaked shirt and struggled with the wet buttons, blushing. A strong gust of wind picked that moment to blow through the meadow, making my skirt, blouse and wet hair billow around me.

And suddenly I was in Edward's arms again, his hands gently rubbing my hips. "You're sure about waiting?" His eyes were golden fire, just inches from mine.

"Me? Am I sure?" When did this happen? But I guess it had. My mind reeled at the thought. "Yes Edward, I think we should wait until after we're married. It's too important to you, and. . ." My voice trailed off as I tried to get the rest of the sentence out, "and to me." I couldn't believe I'd said it. I was more startled that I believed it.

"You always surprise me," he said, and he began deftly buttoning the shirt that I was struggling with, chuckling to himself. I was glad I had the damp cardigan, because my shirt left little to the imagination. Edward, of course, was left with no shirt at all.

"We should go back to my place," Edward suggested. "Even though we'll be husband and wife in a few days, I still don't feel right bringing you back to Charlie like this, and his hand trailed up toward my bare bottom. I swatted it away.

"I can't go back to your house like this!"

"Bella, whose parents would you rather face?"

Well, put that way, it was an easy decision. "If you'd prefer it, we'll just sneak you in and get you up to Alice's room. We'll find something there. But I don't think anyone would mind our appearance in the least."

Then he pulled me into him again. Was he going to ask again? Really, this would wear me down easily. "Bella, I just wanted to thank you for telling me to stop today. I don't have the words to tell you how much it means to me right now. I promise to be on my best behavior until we are legally wed, for the both of us. You have my word."

"Does your best behavior include holding onto my panties?" I teased and tried to grab for them in his back pocket. But I may as well have been trying to catch a shooting star in my hands. Edward was more than too fast for me. "You won't be able to dodge me like that forever, Edward Cullen."

"I look forward to the day, Isabella Swan," and he put his arms around me and lifted me off the ground for a kiss. I kissed him back ferociously.


	18. Why

Vampires don't fidget, but I gave it my best shot. I was loading food into the empty refrigerator. I was playing with my hair. I was rolling and unrolling the sleeves of my blouse. I went food shopping earlier today because the humans would start coming tomorrow. I stocked the bathrooms with human things. I was prepared. That's me, Alice, always effortlessly prepared. Ha.

Of course, the mustard would go . . . here? Yes, this would keep my mind occupied. Almost. Not at all.

The vision hit me again, I gasped and dropped the mustard on the floor and it splattered over the clean tiles. I clutched at my temples and doubled in two. I let my body sink down to the floor. A vision of Jasper fighting off three vampires at once took up all of my mind. When I was alone like this I didn't allow myself to push the images out. It was all I could do for Jasper. It was all I could give him now.

We could have gone to him. At any time I could have told Carlisle, Edward and Esme what was going on. I didn't. I was so sure of the future. And now Jasper and my brother and sister were about to stare down fifteen vampires. I walked my mate into this.

When the vision faded I allowed myself to pull a different vision out of the recesses of my mind. I'm meeting Jasper at Sea-Tac airport and he's holding my hips and leaning his forehead into mine, looking into my eyes. I clutched myself on the floor, willing my hands to be his, willing that time to be now. But it doesn't work like that. I winced and tried not to see three newborn vampires tearing into his back.

I jumped up. I had to keep going. Letting it all fall apart now would be impractical and self-indulgent. I turned on the stereo, cleaned the mustard off of the floor, and concentrated on the proper location for lunchmeat. Thirty seconds were disposed of quite easily. Now there were seventeen minutes until Carlisle and Esme would be back.

Carlisle and Esme were hunting in preparation for Phil and Renee's arrival. They were going to find me in the kitchen, finally alone and with no excuses. They would ask me about Jasper, Emmett and Rose. I couldn't lie and I couldn't tell them anything. I couldn't put their lives at risk too. Then, four minutes later, the phone was going to ring. It was going to be a private number from a pre-paid phone. That was the part that really bugged me. If I knew the number I'd call it now. Peter wanted to know what to send for a wedding gift.

Peter and Charlotte were in The Yukon for three weeks, just like I saw ahead of time. There are no phones there. It was a good plan. It just wasn't good enough.

Valentino was never supposed to be on sentry duty the day the rest of my family arrived in Volterra. It should have been Demetri. But the plane to Italy was delayed, Rose made everyone wait overnight, and then Demetri was called to track down rumors of a werewolf in the Russian Caucasus. Valentino's presence changed everything. To be specific, it was his beheading at Emmett's hands that really did it. The future changes sometimes, it's as simple as that.

But I didn't know if I could hold this all together much longer. It could all come undone in just fourteen minutes now. I didn't know what I was going to say. Moment to moment I saw flashes of myself giving different explanations, going at it from different angles. It never turned out well. Right now I saw another one. "There are just too many outcomes to count," I explained to Carlisle and Esme with my most effective reassuring look on my face. "They'll almost definitely be back. Sure, there's a chance they might not. But I think we should have the wedding anyway." That one wasn't going to go over well.

Eleven minutes. If I could hyperventilate, I would. Where were eggs supposed to go?

I contemplated cutting the phone lines to the house. But then Peter would try Carlisle's cell phone. I could grab it and throw it in the river just as he came back. But there were just too many cell phones to call. I couldn't dispose of all of them. We needed phones. And I didn't want Peter to resort to Edward's cell. If Edward got even a hint of this, he would be able to pull more than enough information from my brain to know what was going on. That couldn't happen.

Cans of soup do not belong in a refrigerator. They should be in the cupboard, I think.

A picture appeared in my brain and was gone in a flash, reflexively. I had a filter on Edward and Bella's future these days, just to be nice. As long as things were progressing as expected, I was staying out of it. Of course the visions were always stored there, and I could just pull them out for a little look if I found the need, like I did now. This image was one I needed back immediately. Edward and Bella were coming through the doorway, wet and bedraggled, as I was arguing with Carlisle and Esme, and then the phone rang. It was Peter. No! This couldn't happen.

I had four minutes. I was out the back door and running toward Carlisle and Esme. I had to head them off. I had to keep them from thinking anything about this within three miles of the house, Edward's range give or take, unless he was focused on us. I hoped not.

They were in front of me in less than a minute. I hadn't a clue what I was going to say.

"Alice!" Esme was startled.

"Hi guys."

Carlisle and Esme exchanged a glance. They were good at exchanging thoughts, even without Edward's gift.

"What brings you out here Alice?"

"We have to talk."

Carlisle nodded. "We do."

"You're worried."

"I am."

"We can't get in touch with them at all. They haven't called."

"Alice, you don't have to repeat what I was planning to say. It doesn't make it any easier."

"It's simpler than figuring out what I should say to you."

"Alice, please." It was Esme. "I need to know they are safe. I need to know what they're doing that would keep them away this long without calling."

"I wouldn't worry so much if Jasper weren't with them. But try as I might I can't think of any reason he would leave you for so long."

Carlisle hit a nerve and I had to work very hard at not crumbling right there. A human had been drained in front of Jasper. Three newborn vampires would be on Jasper's back, attacking. I couldn't respond even if I knew what I was going to say. Instead I hugged myself and tried not to think about what Jasper was going through at this very minute. I tried to think about the vision of him walking through the gate at Sea-Tac airport. All this trying made a vocal response impossible.

Esme knew this instinctively and took a step in my direction to embrace me. But I couldn't let her do that; I couldn't break. A touch of any kind, except one from Jasper, and I would break. Then all of this would be for worse than nothing.

So instead I stepped back from Esme and looked up to meet their mutual gaze.

"They were never in The Yukon."

They didn't react. It was obvious that they had assumed as much.

"Where then?"

"I can't say."

"Alice."

"I can't say. Not for fifty years."

"The Volturi!"

I didn't move. I didn't speak.

Esme clutched Carlisle; her eyes were a bit wild. "Working for the Volturi?"

Carlisle looked from Esme to myself. I didn't look away. I owed him that. "Esme, let's think about this rationally." Carlisle looked at me with patience that seemed boundless in this moment.

"There must have been a good reason."

I nodded.

"But they've been gone longer than you expected."

I nodded again.

"Are they in trouble?"

"Some." I couldn't say how much. One glance at Esme was too much. I took in everything around me besides my adoptive parents; the birds chirping, the ants crawling by in a line, the hint of pink around the edges of the horizon, the scents of deer and fox in the air. And the scent of Edward and Bella in the air. They were close.

"Alice, why did they do this? I need to know, please."

We didn't have any more time. Edward and Bella would be walking in the door in three minutes, just as the phone was ringing.

"I'll show you why. But to do that we have to go back to the house, and I need you both to guard your thoughts. You cannot think about any of this while we're at the house. It's very important. There's a call I need to get, from Peter. I need you to agree to this before we can go. Maybe it's not fair, but it's necessary."

They looked at each other again, and both nodded their assent in my direction. We sped back to the house and came through the back door just as the front door was opening.

Edward walked into the house with Bella in his arms. She had her arms around his neck and they were beaming at one another. Edward was the happiest I had ever seen him, almost giddy. Bella was confident and radiant. But aside from the expressions on their faces, they looked like something a cat had dragged in. Their clothing was damp, crumpled and slightly dirty, their hair hung in wet locks. Edward was missing his shirt and Bella may or may not have been wearing underwear. When Bella turned to see Carlisle, Esme and I standing there, her face turned a deep shade of red. It was mouthwatering. Edward's smile broadened as he looked down at Bella, tousled her hair, and whispered something reassuring in her ear.

"Hi," Bella squeaked in our direction. I gave a little wave and tried to look encouraging, while Carlisle and Esme managed a polite nod, both barely suppressing an outright grin.

"Excuse us," Edward requested with an uncharacteristic glint in his eye, and Bella ducked her head into his chest and giggled as he ran up to his room.

"That's why we did it." I said.

The phone rang. "Now, not another thought. Let me get this. I promise we'll talk when I'm done."


	19. Payment

**Hey guys, I did my best with this one. It's the first time I've ever written any kind of big fight scene.**

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Rose pulled her hand from mine.

"Rose?"

"Emmett, don't worry about me, I can do this." She turned back toward the scene unfolding in front of the three of us and a low hiss escaped from her mouth.

There was no more time to talk. No time to embrace. No time to consider why we were outnumbered five to one. The ragtag army was quickly making their way toward us, fifteen pairs of wild red eyes glinting in the rays of the early morning sun. Their eyes all seemed slightly unfocused and rolled in their sockets, and their teeth were bared and ready.

Venom filled my mouth and my upper lip pulled into a snarl. From deep in my chest I felt a rumble build, and without willing it, I was roaring and crouching, my arms extended. Jasper and Rose's voices joined mine. Then in a coordinated move, we removed our desert coverings and the strong desert sun shattered off of our skin, scattering rays in a million directions. The newborns shielded their eyes and slowed their pace. I couldn't stay on the wall if I tried, and felt my feet hit the hot sand before I was consciously aware that I jumped.

Three were coming at me from my right. Their eyes were red, their mouths were open, and their teeth were dripping with venom. I heard Rose's snarl ring out in the desert air as she hit the ground. I was on fire. I charged at the three vamps, and just before running head on into them, I dove into the sand like I was diving for home base back at a family baseball game in Forks. Sand flew at my attackers, momentarily blinding them.

"Woo!" This might be fun.

I took this split second advantage to tear the head off of one. I had no time to completely do away with each attacking vamp. This fight had to be over fast enough to so that we could completely shred and burn our opponents when it was all over, before they could literally reassemble. Metallic snaps and tears rang out as I quickly pulled limb from limb and flung each in a different direction.

While the two in front of me clawed at the sand in their eyes like wild animals, I heard rapidly approaching footsteps from behind. I stayed still and breathed, working to time my hearing with the actions of my muscles. I listened to approaching breaths to calculate where his head and neck would be. I leapt, and with a bian tui kick, managed to catch the approaching vampire in the neck, sending him flying in an arc and knocking over the other two vampires. My shin crushed his windpipe and he was stunned enough to give me another second. It was all the time I needed to tear his head off.

But I'd given the other two vamps more than enough chance to recover. Before I could dislodge arms and legs from the body I was holding, my head was pushed under the sand and two vampires were on top of me. My other senses were heightened as my sight was cut off. I could hear footfalls; hisses, growls, and the sounds of metal shredding metal filled the desert air. I felt claws on my back and knew that teeth would be next to pierce my skin.

I closed my eyes and took two quick, sand-filled breaths, enough to ground me. Then, since I was pinned on my back and had no physical leverage, I pulled force from within myself and exploded upward from my position. My fists neatly punched each of my attackers directly in the face and I landed on my feet. They each flew back about fifty yards, and then slid another ten, easy.

I looked around and saw Jasper to my left, a neat blur as he deftly maneuvered himself around his attackers and struck precise debilitating blows with ease. He was faster than anyone I had ever seen, besides maybe Alice. Rose was just beyond him. I was floored. She was grace in motion. While she didn't have my strength or Jasper's precision, the fluidity of her movement was the closest to Chun-Tao and Dung-Mei's teachings out of the three of us. She was able to effortlessly dodge and weave, keeping her attackers at bay until the moment when she could go in for the kill.

I looked between the two of the vamps I was fighting and quickly judged who needed to go first. The one to my left was more muscular, but the one on my right was already back on his feet. So, the little one it was. I ran at him head on and when we were within striking distance he lunged. I stopped, and with his hands inches from my face I stepped to the side and caught him across his abdomen with my arm. He folded in two and fell to the ground. I grabbed him by the head, but his hands quickly found my neck.

The shock of not breathing stopped me for a millisecond. Like all newborns, his strength was staggering. The little vampire's hands tightened their grip, so I had to focus and work fast. He struggled and kicked with his feet, almost knocking us both to the ground and his hands continued to tighten around my neck.

I pulled him up by his head so that his neck was level with my mouth. He was snarling and snapping at my wrists, leaving a long expanse of neck exposed in front of my face. I tore into it. I bit through his neck with my teeth, and his strangle hold started to loosen. My teeth ground their way through granite flesh and bone. I clutched harder as the vamp's grasp continued to weaken and I had his head off quickly after that. I continued ripping into his torso, tearing at his shoulder, pulling away stony white flesh bit by bit.

But then I was hit on the back from behind. My face was in the sand. I felt sharp teeth pierce into my shoulder blade. Damn. I got carried away. Blood or no blood, it was hard to keep a level head when teeth became involved.

I pressed my hands into the sand and pushed my body off of the ground. The vampire behind me was locked onto my back with his jaws, and he wound his hands around my body. The pain was searing, and radiated out from my shoulder like a sunburst. I stretched my hands over my head and managed to reach under his arms. With all the strength I had, I pulled and flipped him over my head, and he fell to the ground in front of me.

I was on my knees. A large piece of my upper back was in his mouth. The pain was so intense I didn't know if I'd be able to stand. I tried to concentrate and struggle to hold him down, but he was a newborn and stronger than me. I released my grip and he was back on his feet. But I anticipated that, and as soon as he was standing my fist hit him in the diaphragm. He flew backwards, and collided with a sand dune. I charged, had his neck in my hands, and it was over for him quickly.

I turned, ready for more oncoming vampires, but didn't see any. I looked for Rose, she was doing the final dance with her attacker, jumping in, breaking an arm, jumping back, and so forth, wearing him down. It would be over soon for him. Maybe this whole episode was almost over.

But that's when I heard a piercing wail from the other side of the main gate. A chorus of snarls erupted in response, almost in celebration. I looked over to see that all of the remaining newborns had refocused their attention on Jasper. He was surrounded, and three newborns had clamped on to him from behind, trying to take him down.

His face was contorted into a fierce grimace of pain and anger. He was able to tear at the attackers on his back, even as they tore into him with their sharp teeth. I had a sneaking suspicion that someone had passed along information about Sakhmet's preferences. But there was no time to think about that.

Rose shouted, "Go help Jazz, now!"

Immediately I was running, growling, lunging for the vamps surrounding my brother, and then pain seared through the wound on my shoulder and I was down, my face in the sand. A voice I knew only too well snarled in my ear, "I'm going to turn you over so you can watch me kill you." I was immediately wound as tightly as a spring, and my fingers flexed into claws. I let him turn me over. I wanted to see this face one more time before I ripped it to shreds. I glared and snarled as Valentino stared down at me.

My fingers clawed at his face, dug into his eyes and he roared with fury. But his hands were around my throat and refused to let go, his legs were braced around my body holding me down. Jasper cried out in pain. I could hear the final grunts and a low moan as Rose finished off her attacker.

"Jazz, hold on!" she cried and her footsteps faded in Jasper's direction. Then there was a flurry of activity and Rose cried out with a thunderous snarl, "Get off my brother you fuckers!"

I was pushing Valentino off of me with all my might, but he had every advantage and it was all I could do to keep my head and limbs attached. Valentino was using his hands and legs to pin me down completely while his face lunged for my neck. I was able to pull one arm free and I hooked a finger into his eye socket. Valentino gasped and loosened his grip just enough for me to free my other arm. He lunged for my neck with his teeth, but I punched him across the face with enough force to send his body sailing sideways.

I was on my feet, our bodies collided with a thunderous crack, and we were back on the ground wrestling with a vengeance. I was able to grab an ear with my teeth, pull it off and spit it out on the sand. I jumped to my feet and Valentino's piercing shriek of agony seemed to echo in stereo within Sakhmet's compound. He lunged at me again, and I realized that there had actually been someone else crying out. The shrieks from the compound intensified and I thought dimly that I recognized the voice.

Suddenly, Sakhmet's voice could be heard over the din. "No, she will be fine. Go to him, now!"

And in fractions of a second Dong-Mei was at Jasper's side. Her movements were almost delicate as she found the best points of purchase and tossed the vampires off of Jasper one after the other. Of course, they came running back, but Jasper and Dong-Mei were ready for them. In reality, Jasper didn't have to even move. With a quickness and agility that was difficult to track, she deftly tore the head off of each of the three attacking vampires one by one. Jasper went to work quickly, tearing them all into smaller pieces.

By this time, I had Valentino weakened and broken. His head, left arm, and right leg looked like they were attached to his body at odd angles. I lunged at him, and he sprung out of my way, as if to run for it. I grabbed him by the ankle, and pulled him toward me. Little by little, starting with his foot, I tore him into small white vampire chunks.

Rose was finishing off one of the vampires that she pulled off Jasper, and now that I was finished with Valentino, I looked around trying to count all of the corpses. We had to gather them, shred them and burn them in short order, before heads, limbs and bodies could reunite and attack again.

I jogged over to Rose. I wanted to be next to her and touch her, even if I'd be tearing apart vampires in the meantime. I didn't believe it was over yet, but victory bubbles were beginning to make their way into my consciousness.

Rose finished off her attacker, hugged me, and hung on me a little. We didn't speak. Then she saw the hole in the back of my shirt and the wound there. "Oh, Emmett. I didn't know."

"It will heal."

"You'll have a scar." I felt her soft tongue flick over my wound, helping the healing process along, and she placed her hand over my chest. I noticed pieces of hard white vampire flesh under her manicured nails.

But then from behind us we heard Jasper cry out. Rose and I spun around to see Jane extending her right hand in his direction. Jasper was on the ground writhing. Dong-Mei glared at Jane.

"So now we know how the Cullens win fights. They cheat." Jane seemed to take her punishment up a notch and Jasper's body jumped and twitched. Rose and I headed straight for Jane, but Felix jumped into our path, crouching and snarling.

Out of the corner of my eyes I saw Chun-Tao jump down from the wall, and Dong-Mei ran to her. They spoke in quick whispers to one another and in a blur of color and sparkle they were on top of Jane. Jasper was on his feet and running toward Felix, an angry grimace clouding his countenance.

"Felix!" Jane commanded, fighting for her life. Felix turned to her, but Jasper was closing in on him. There was nothing for Felix to do but fight Jasper. Jane didn't have a chance. I smiled, waiting to see the evil little thing finally get her due. We'd all be a lot safer with her out of the picture.

Dong-Mei's question carried out to us all on the dessert air. "Do I finish her?"

"No. That will be enough, thank you."

We all froze. The commanding voice was coming from the direction of the main gate. It was a voice I had heard only one other time. We all turned to watch the large gates of the compound open. Marcus, the owner of the voice was there. At his side were Aro, Caius and ten Volturi guardsmen. Sakhmet stood off to the side, behind their contingent. It appeared Marcus had a gift for stopping violence with a simple command.

Aro stepped forward. "Jane, Felix, please join us." They walked forward, their eyes on the ground. Caius snarled as they walked past.

I gripped Rose's hand and she squeezed back. This wasn't good. This wasn't good at all. I looked over at Jasper. He was glaring at the Volturi contingent, his eyes bright with fury. There were some strips of his upper back that looked like they were hanging away from his body.

"It appears the army was put down." Aro started.

"We have some clean-up to do," I said, "or they won't be down for long." To myself I silently added, "except for Valentino."

Aro gave an almost imperceptible nod to three of the guards armed with torches. They began the job of collecting and burning body parts.

"It appears you have acquired some unorthodox fighting techniques." Aro raised his eyebrows.

"What did you expect when you sent us here?" Jasper challenged, with a bit more malice in his voice than I felt was safe.

"Fair question. I expected a little less from those two," Aro glowered in the direction of Chun-Tao and Dong-Mei.

"Yes, Aro, they had help. They did not follow the rules." Jane managed to look imperious despite the fact that she had been a split second from annihilation.

"I didn't see Valentino following any rules either." I interjected.

"I don't see Valentino at all," Aro countered. "It appears you have dismembered my guard again. This time, with a bit more finality."

"What was he doing out here, anyway?" Chun-Tao demanded.

"What were you doing?" Aro actually took a step in the direction of the two fighters and they looked as if they were ready to pounce.

"I allowed it." Sakhmet stepped forward. All eyes were suddenly on her. "It was my responsibility to keep my fighters out of the battle. But Jasper was targeted more than the other two. So I let them go. I fear there may have been some bias among Abu Nuwas' converts." Sakhmet walked slowly toward Jasper with a very cautious look on her face. As she came closer she reached her right hand up just slightly from her waist. Jasper hissed and bared his teeth, as tension radiated off of him in waves. Sakhmet stopped in her tracks, but continued to stare in his direction.

The look of shock on Aro and Caius's faces was priceless. Their eyebrows were raised so high I thought their parchment-like skin might tear.

"I couldn't stop both of the fighters." Jane's voice was gritty and angry. "Felix couldn't stop even one," she offered without prompting. She was acting like a child. Aro seemed to ignore her.

"What do we do with the three of you now?" Aro asked out loud. I had a funny feeling that he knew exactly what he wanted to do with us.

"We followed your orders and we defeated the army. We can leave." It was as clear as that.

"Not so fast." He looked at the collection of vampires in front of him. Rose and I had our arms around one another, and Rose was also clasping Jasper's hand tightly. Sakhmet was on the other side of Jasper, and looked for all the world like she would like to embrace him. Chun-Tao and Dong-Mei stood with us, facing the council, clearly conveying that they were on our side.

"I have learned quite a bit about your coven from this experience. At the very least it seems that you make unlikely allies."

"But you have us in a bit of a bind. You aided us. You killed the rogue vampires in this region like we asked you to. But you did receive aid that we didn't count on in our bargain. And more importantly, you destroyed the guard that brought you here in the first place. That changes things considerably." A chorus of hisses went up from the guards assembled before us. A few smiled and bared their teeth, anxious for a fight.

Aro reached out to touch the hands of Caius and Marcus. They each gave a solemn nod without so much as looking at one another. I got the distinct impression that this had all been discussed before hand. But there was no proof.

"We are feeling inclined to give Bella some more time." I heard a hiss from Jane's direction.

"Valentino's death is not her fault. If she isn't changed by the end of the year, your coven will have a choice. Either Bella must give her life, or I will accept a member of your family as forfeit. There is much I could benefit from having one of you work for me. I would prefer it to wasting a gift like Bella's. Of course, her death may be inevitable. We are naturally selfish creatures."

The protectiveness I felt for Edward and Bella took hold of me. Bella had to live, no matter what. If Edward got his wish and could keep her from changing for some time, I would not let Aro get in the way. I squeezed Rose's hand and looked toward her. She looked back at me and I could see a look of shock registered on her face.

I couldn't read her mind, and I know she couldn't read mine, but I tried my best to let her know what I was thinking. I shouted silently that I needed to help them. That I wouldn't be able to live with myself if anything prevented their happiness. That I had been blessed with so much, and Edward had had none of it until now. I knew what I had to do. I said that all with my eyes, with my heart. Rose nodded.

I looked back to Aro and stepped forward. Rose stepped forward too. I looked at her. She nodded at me again.

I turned back to Aro. His eyebrows were raised in a question, and a smirk was playing on his lips.

"Take me."

"And me, you don't get Emmett without me." I looked at Rose, stunned. She smiled at me and seemed quite peaceful.

"Rose, no."

Aro's face was lit with malevolent satisfaction. "Wonderful, how would you say it? Two Cullens for the price of one."

"Emmett, I would do this, not just to be with you, but for my family. Without this we would fall apart." She clutched my hand tighter, and then looked back toward the council.

"Fabulous. And Jasper, would you join as well?"

Jasper's expression was unreadable. He glanced at Rose and I and cast his eyes toward the ground.

"You have more than you asked for Aro. Certainly we've satisfied your requirements. It's time you let us go."

"You are right, Emmett. For my sake I hope Alice is wrong and Bella decides to remain human. I hope that you might join our ranks. But be warned. We will be watching your family closely. If there is any hint of a transgression before the year is up, we will know and we will find you."

With that, the Volturi started filing slowly past us into the bright sun of the dessert morning. Jane snarled as she walked by. Anther guard moved past and dropped our cell phones and personal possessions to the ground. We turned to watch them slowly disappear over the horizon.

"It's over," Jasper whispered.

"Goddamn! We did it!" I grabbed Rose and spun her around. "It's over baby. Let's go home." I reached over to pat Jasper on the shoulder. He winced slightly.

"Dude, sorry."

"It's nothing. Let's go." I felt homesickness hit me like a tidal wave.

"Hey, hey, calm down. We're leaving, you don't need to be so blatant about it!" I joked weakly.

We rummaged through the possessions that had been thrown in the sand. We hugged Dong-Mei and Chun-Tao. They promised to come visit as soon as they could get away. We thanked them for saving Jasper's life.

"Jasper." It was Sakhmet. "You are welcome here whenever you wish to return."

"I won't be coming back, ever."

"I know."

Rose and I gently wound our arms around Jasper's waist to help to support him. We walked due north into the empty, open dessert.


	20. Last Night Part I

**It's taking a while to work through Edward's thoughts at the end here . . . I'm trying to reconcile Edward's naturally conflicted nature with my own version of a changed Edward - someone a little more confident and certain of himself. So I'm doing it in two parts to make it more manageable. Here's part I - enjoy! **

* * *

I dashed up to my room with Bella in my arms, and leapt onto the leather couch. It was pushed against the wall to make space for the bed. I held her body close to mine and looked down to see her smiling up at me. "So much for sneaking in," Bella giggled, still blushing.

"They ran up to the house quite fast, and for some reason I couldn't hear their thoughts." I would have to consider their silent approach later, right now I didn't want my attention diverted. Cradling Bella in my arms like this brought back memories of that first day I had her here in my room. It was one of my favorite memories.

"The first time I brought you here I didn't know how to be with you, or what exactly I wanted to do with you. I was just happy to hold you and not kill you." I reeled at my choice of words. I had become so unguarded with Bella that I was letting too much slip. Did I really say that I was happy simply for not ending her life? I looked down to see if I frightened her. But Bella's eyes were glowing and her lips were slightly parted.

"Do you know what you want to do with me now?"

Images of Bella and I stream through my mind, one after the other. Ideas that I never would have considered, that I once thought were impossible, I was now impatient for. "Yes, I have a very good idea. After we're married, I'll have you here. I'll show you what I want to do." I could see it already in my mind and it was like a new force had taken hold of me. I was afraid I would loose control and I pulled away. Did I scare Bella? Because frankly, I'd scared myself a bit.

I smiled a little in an attempt to soften my words and glanced nervously at my love. Bella's eyes were wide and warm and her heart was thumping steadily. She wasn't scared. She never is. She pulled herself closer to me, stroking the back of my neck. Her touch set all of my senses on fire and I actually saw colors before my eyes: blues and oranges.

"What about now? You made a promise about endings the other night. We cut things short in the meadow."

"Bella." I couldn't keep my mouth from hers, I wanted to feel the way her slightly swollen lips would mold themselves against my unyielding mouth. I kissed her and I immediately wanted more. I had to remind myself with every second to hold myself back, not to lay her down and throw myself on top of her. I braced myself and pulled my mouth from hers and buried my face in her hair instead. I took a deep breath and used her scent to steady my nerves.

"I also made a promise today. I promised to be good."

"Well, we're obviously going to have to break one of those promises." She smiled seductively up at me and her heart fluttered, and it was like dawn breaking over the horizon. I knew that I would have to find I way to be with her, because otherwise I would do it without thinking. I had to touch her, I had to possess her; I had to find a way inside of her.

I was rocked with an overwhelming sensation of love and desire. There was no separating one from the other. My emotional and my physical draw to Bella were completely interlaced one with the other. It was still hard to believe that one physical sensation, the desire to drink, had been replaced so completely with the desire to touch her, to feel her, to take her and love her. I felt like I needed a beating heart of my own right now in order to steady myself, and to help channel this energy. Instead, I felt the overwhelming force of my love and my lust push itself out through my skin and through my eyes. My body was quivering with desire and I knew my eyes were on fire.

Suddenly, a flood of thoughts hit me. "They're OK! They're coming back. Jazz is coming home. Two days!" It was Alice. I realized that she must have had a wall up for some time now. Over these weeks I'd heard less and less from her mind. It was gradual and I had been preoccupied, but now it was like a dam had broken.

"They'll be back in time. He'll be here. He's OK! They're all OK!" There were some other thoughts I tried to block out, but Alice was practically shouting them.

"What is it?" Bella saw that I was distracted. I sighed and tried to tuck her skirt around her more securely.

Alice ran to the door and burst into the room.

"They're coming! They're coming!" Alice squealed with delight. She pranced over to us and jumped onto the couch, careful not to pounce on Bella. She gave us both an enormous hug.

"Who, the British?" Bella chuckled.

"Jasper's coming home! They'll all be here. They get in the night before the wedding. It's all working out!" A smile took up all of Alice's small face. Her teeth were flashing and her eyes were bright. She smiled back and forth between the two of us. But then the situation in the room seemed to dawn on Alice. It didn't take a vampire to see that there was something more going on here than a quiet talk on the couch.

She jumped up. "Oh, sorry, I was just so excited." She backed up a little, turned toward the door, but then swung around back to face Bella and I.

"Oh Bella, I forgot, I'm supposed to be helping you." Alice walked back to us and pulled Bella to her feet. "Just go jump in the shower, I'll throw your things in the wash." Alice scrunched her nose in disapproval as she picked at Bella's damp and dirty cardigan.

"_I'll throw them in the trash is more like it. Was she pretending to be a librarian_?"

"I'll have something for you to change into when you get out," Alice assured Bella out loud.

"Thanks. That sounds great." Bella turned to look at me longingly, a little startled at the abrupt change in circumstance.

"Go, go. Edward will be here when you get out. I promise." Alice shooed Bella out the door.

"_Well, I should be going," _Alice thought.

"To get Bella something to wear?"

"_Maybe she would be more comfortable in something of her own?"_

"Aren't you planning on washing, or trashing her clothes?"

"_I know there is something of hers in your closet."_

I pursed my lips together and tried to look menacing. But I wasn't certain if I could scare a rabbit these days. "Alice, about that privacy you promised us."

"_Edward, I've never seen her in it. I can't help knowing you bought it. Am I supposed to keep shopping trips out of my mind now too? Really, that's asking a bit too much."_

"But…"

"_Edward, I'll take care of the honeymoon. Tonight is your last night together before the wedding. Give it to her now."_

"Our last night?"

"_Bella doesn't know yet. Renee is going to ask to stay over at Charlie's place. She wants to make the most of the time she has with Bella."_

"She might never see Renee again." Guilt was now nipping at the edges of my joy. I hated that I was taking Bella away from her family.

"_You'll want her to spend as much time with Renee as possible. So we're giving you tonight. I'm stopping by Charlie's house with Carlisle and Esme. I'll get something for Bella to wear tomorrow."_

"Tomorrow?"

Alice ignored my question and turned to go. But I knew I had to stop her. I'd been working on something for her for weeks. Now that her gift was out of Seth's hands I knew that it wouldn't be a surprise much longer.

"Alice, wait. There's something I wanted to give you as thanks for all of your hard work this month."

I savored the look of surprise on her face.

"I had Seth Clearwater help so that you wouldn't be able to see," I explained. I didn't want her to think that she was losing her touch. "I tried getting into your brain to figure out what you might want."

I noticed the expression on Alice's face change from surprised delight to one of alarm. "Edward!"

"But you've been very hard to read lately."

"_Thank God!"_

"What?"

"_Oh, nothing. You were saying?"_

I cast a suspicious glance at her out of the corner of my eyes, but proceeded anyway. "The only thing I could find out at first is that you wanted to go to Italy with Jasper. And well…"

"Oh Edward, thank you!" She could see it now. Alice flung her arms around my neck and kissed my cheek. "I get a tent and everything?"

"Yes, you'll show your own line at fashion week in Milan next summer. The label is set up; they're just waiting for your designs. You might consider taking Seth on in some capacity, he's really taken a shine to the business end of it all. I think he may have even picked up some Italian in the process."

Alice flooded my mind with visions of patterns, fabrics and models walking down runways.

"That's not all. Lately it seemed like your dreams of Italy fell by the wayside. I got the impression that what you really wanted more than anything was to go to the desert with Jasper."

The smile fell from Alice's face. "_Oh, right."_

"It seemed odd to me, but I'm not one to judge another's desires. Here are tickets for a cruise on the Nile in February. It turns out that it's quite easy to secure a private cruise during the rainy season."

"_Thanks…but I don't know how much Jasper's going to like this one_." Alice cast a brave face in my direction.

"He'll like it as long as he's there with you."

A more genuine smile returned and Alice's eyes twinkled. "I'm just so happy he's coming home. We've never been apart for this long."

I had been giving Alice wide berth lately. There was so much she wanted to keep secret regarding the wedding, and there was the privacy she was trying to provide for Bella and I. I had taken her at her word when she dismissed my inquiries about Emmett, Rose and Jasper. "He's been away too long. What kept them Alice?"

"Edward?" It was Carlisle. His voice was raised a little louder than usual.

Relief flooded over Alice's features.

"I guess Carlisle needs you. Get the chemise. I'll bring it in to Bella, unless you want to bring it to her," Alice grinned.

I heard water hit the tiles in the shower and thought of Bella nude, water streaming over her warm pink skin, her scent hanging heavy in the steamy air. I struggled to control the feelings stirring within myself.

"Right, I'll get that for you, Alice." I took the small box from a top shelf in my closet and with another thought I took out my bathrobe. I knew Bella would want something else to wear, no matter Alice's intentions. I handed them both to Alice and she rolled her eyes.

"_Oh, you two."_ With that she skipped toward the bathroom.

I listened in on Carlisle and Esme's thoughts as I made my way down to the dining room. Carlisle was contemplating anatomical dissection, and Esme was contrasting the merits of granite vs. travertine. A sinking feeling crept into my mind. I hadn't been paying enough attention to my family these past weeks. I was sure they were keeping something from me.


	21. Last Night Part II

I found Carlisle and Esme looking out the window toward the forest, holding hands. They turned as I walked into the room. Esme was at my side. "Son, you've made me so happy."

In her mind, Esme replayed my recent entrance through the front door with Bella. I watched myself through her eyes somewhat incredulously. I was taken aback by the difference in my eyes, my actions, and especially my reaction to Bella's blushing cheeks. I had leaned in toward Bella and smiled, drawn to her embarrassment and her human warmth. But it wasn't the vampiric reaction that the rest of my family, or the rest of my species, would have automatically shown. It was a much more human gesture.

I couldn't keep the smile from my lips as I ran through the scene twice more in my brain. Esme placed her hands on my shoulders and hugged me. "To see you and Bella together like this, to see what it's done for you, it warms my heart. I knew it would work itself out."

Carlisle was grinning openly. "If I didn't know better, I'd think…" I stopped him, somewhat embarrassed in front of Esme.

"Carlisle, you know I would never…" But he cut me off as well.

"Son, in my eyes Bella is already yours and has been for some time. I respect your stance, but know that it is your choice. I'm fine with whatever you and Bella decide. I don't suppose I have to remind you to be safe?"

I'd heard this caution several times in the minds of other parents, but it always revolved around contraception. Surely Carlisle was the only parent reminding his son not to accidentally break his fiancé. A stray thought found its way into my head and tugged at my buoyant mood. If only I had to worry about birth control. I suddenly wished for a child to complete the human picture that ran through Esme's mind. I was surprised by this new emotion and tucked it carefully away for later evaluation.

"Edward?" Carlisle was grinning at me, with pride perhaps.

Esme made herself busy in the kitchen, with what I couldn't fathom. She could certainly hear us from the next room, but I appreciated the gesture. She was now enumerating the pros and cons of compressed earth block vs. cement in her mind.

"No, you don't have to remind me. If I didn't love Bella as much as I do, if she weren't worth more to me than my own life, I would never have the willpower to restrain myself with every second we were together. If she didn't love me back, I wouldn't have the nerve to try."

"Then perhaps this will work for the two of you." Carlisle tactfully gazed out into the darkening forest.

"Perhaps." I breathed coolly, matching his gaze.

"Edward, Alice says you two only have one more night together before the wedding. You should stay here with Bella tonight. How often do you get the chance to be alone with one another?"

"You're leaving your son and his fiancé home alone for the evening?"

"I think the last time you two did this you ended up engaged. See how well that turned out?"

"Hmm."

"Edward, if you're going to spend weeks alone together, one night seems like a good place to start."

Alice ran down the stairs and paused by the front door. "Ready?"

Esme was at my side again. "Good night, son." She kissed my cheek.

With a nod from Carlisle they were out the door. The house was completely quiet, except for the sound of water on tiles, Bella's heartbeat, and her voice. I smiled broadly. Bella was tunelessly humming her lullaby to herself in the shower.

I swiftly made my way to the shower on the second floor and washed the dirt and twigs off of my body as well. I chose comfortable drawstring linen pants and a white T-shirt to wear. Then I was downstairs in the kitchen. Luckily, Alice went shopping for human food today. Unfortunately, vampires can't make water boil or meat defrost any quicker than a human. I settled on preparing Bella a dinner of soup and sandwiches.

To distract myself from the revolting foodstuff in front of me I listened to Bella's heartbeat in the shower. Its steady rhythm would have to be enough for the two of us. It would have to anchor us both to this earth, for I was so happy I thought I might float. Thump thump, thump thump. I was about to marry the woman I loved most in this world. Thump thump, thump thump. I was about to make both of our dreams come true. Thump thump, thump thump. I thought about how far Bella and I had come in such a short amount of time.

And then the water was off. I heard the click of the glass shower door and the padding of Bella's wet feet as she left the stall. Then her heart began to accelerate and I wondered what was upsetting her. I stopped myself from dashing to the bathroom door, knowing full well that I wouldn't be able to keep it closed.

Of course, Bella would be looking at the garments Alice brought for her. I purchased the midnight blue silk and lace chemise for Bella to wear on our honeymoon. I'd like to say that I didn't know how I let Alice talk me into giving it to Bella this evening, but it would be a lie. I wanted so badly to see the soft blue silk draped on Bella's body. I wanted to compare the texture of silk to the texture of her skin and I wanted to feel the friction of silk on skin as I moved my body against it.

This excitement was dangerous. I had to stay focused and remain in control. But my mind took me back to this afternoon in the meadow.

**

I remembered how Bella's skin was flushed pink and damp with rainwater, lying on her back. Her hair had been wet and wild, tangled around her head and flecked with leaves and blades of grass. Her big brown eyes were partially hidden by eyelids that were heavy with the desire that she felt for me.

She had said I was beautiful. My cold white skin and strange eyes were beautiful to her. I was nothing compared to her vibrant living body; her face, her warm skin, the rise of her small breasts, the curve of her hips, her long legs that always seemed to wrap themselves around my waist.

"Not compared to you."

I had been overwhelmed. This woman was going to make my dream come true. This exquisite creature would be my wife in just three short days. And I was going to make her wish come true too. I felt I could do this. I could give her the one thing she wanted besides a life of damned immortality. I felt strong, powerful, and joyous.

"You know I love you?" The sentiment paled in comparison to the emotions that were surging through my body.

"Of course." She had said it without hesitation. She knew how I felt. Even though she couldn't hear my mind, even though I held back from her, forced her into compromises. She knew I loved her. Her trust was infinite.

"And you know I love you?" Her question had almost made my resolve melt right there. I had struggled with that question for so long. How many times I wished I could hear her thoughts so that I might know. It took me so long to accept the idea that I was lovable in the same way. It was a leap of faith that I had been too frightened and too full of self-loathing to make. But now I knew it, Bella loved me. And that also made me feel powerful and strong. I thought all of this as I gazed into her eyes. Her heartbeat quickened as she watched me. I saw the rise and fall of her pulse as blood surged through her neck. I traced a path with my eyes to its source, her heart.

"I do," I answered.

I needed to touch her, to feel her warmth on my skin. My resolve was gone. "Bella, do you know how long I've wanted this?" I wondered if she knew what I meant. I wanted to share myself with her. I wanted to trust myself the way that she trusted herself in my arms. I wanted to show her what she could do to me.

Carefully, I lowered my body to hers and gently pressed my erection into her hip.

"No."

Her answer cut like a knife. She didn't know.

"I only hoped."

Why would she know? I denied her at every turn and had given little indication that I cared for this intimacy at all. How could she be certain of another creature's desires? She knew her own. I kept mine masked. I needed to show her.

I began rubbing myself against her body, softly, carefully. Kissing her. Her eyes flew open, with shock, burning with awareness and with something else that it took me a moment to identify. Triumph. My mouth was on hers.

"I couldn't let you know. I couldn't trust myself."

She asked something. What was it? The hunger I felt had become intense. I was moving towards something, my body was moving forward and my mind was two steps behind. I was trying to answer Bella while her scent was singing a siren song, pulling me toward disaster.

"Bella," I fought to calm myself, "I still have to be careful." I said it for her as well as myself.

"Let me show you how careful you have to be." I was falling again, falling into her. Bella's words were another chip at my willpower. Yes, I should have her show me. She guided my body and I was consumed with desire. I let her maneuver my erection between her legs and I shuddered, my groin ached, and I rested, letting her guide me. It was perfect.

**

The bathroom door clicked open, and I heard Bella's footsteps on the third floor landing. My mind snapped back to the present. I scattered candles around the dining room and quickly lit them. If this was our last night together before we were man and wife I would make it special. I'd find a way to keep both promises I had made in haste. I'd make Bella's voice sing out for me tonight. But I'd make sure to hold myself back for just one more night.

I cold smell her before she came into my line of vision. The warm water of the shower turned her scent into a heady perfume that hung in the air around her like a cloud. I closed my eyes to better appreciate her aroma, and Bella padded hesitantly into the dining room. I opened my eyes and it took every shred of my restraint to hold myself to the bargain I had just made. The sight of Bella, wrapped in my bathrobe, her long hair streaming down her back and around her face set my heart on fire. I was all too aware that this vision was about to be mine for the rest of my life, and my breath came faster and as I marveled at this realization.

"Oh Edward, this is so pretty," Bella murmured casting a glance over the candlelit dining room and the table settings I had arranged.

But before I could reply, her cell phone rang. It was Charlie's ring tone. I silently cursed myself for purchasing the phone in the first place, but handed it to her anyway.

Bella sighed and turned to talk to her father. I tried to look pre-occupied.

"Hey dad."

"I just wanted to call to say to have fun tonight."

"What?" Bella's heart skipped a beat or two. I couldn't imagine where Charlie was going with this.

"Alice was just here. She told me about the surprise bachelorette party. To be honest Bells, I would have put an end to it if it weren't for Carlisle and Esme. But they told me it was just going to be a couple of you at their house."

"Right."

"Hey, I can hear it in your voice. I know you don't like these things, but have fun kiddo. You only do this once. No drinking, you hear me?"

"Sure dad."

"I'll see you back here for the fitting tomorrow, right?"

"Mm hmm. Right."

"Then we'll go get Renee and Phil together."

"I think mom would really appreciate that."

"Night Bells, I'll see you in the morning."

"Good night, dad."

Bella clicked the phone shut and turned to look at me. "Did you…"

"No, it was Alice, and Carlisle, and maybe Esme too."

"Oh." She looked slightly disappointed.

"Do you mind spending the night with me?" Suddenly I realized that she might feel forced into this.

"I thought since you didn't plan this, maybe you didn't want to spend the night with me."

I was across the room and she was in my arms. I ran my hands through her wet fragrant hair, and pressed her body to mine. "Do you really think that?" I pressed my lips against hers. "How could you imagine that I didn't want this? This is why I want to marry you. So that it will be just you and I forever. So that every night can be like this."

Bella grinned from ear to ear. "I just wanted to hear you say it. There's no place I'd rather be."

* * *

**A/N: OK, OK, so it's in three parts. Sorry! Edward just can't stop himself from thinking! **


	22. Last Night Part III

**Unfortunately, I don't own Twilight, Edward or Bella. While I'm at it, I didn't write Quiet Night, Quiet Stars as sung by Astrud Gilberto. I also don't speak Portuguese and I don't wrestle moose. Just to be clear.**

* * *

With vampire speed I had Bella seated at the dining room table, a delicate linen napkin over her lap. There was mid-century Brazilian jazz playing on the stereo system, a nod to our secret honeymoon destination. The fire was lit. It was a summer night, but I thought some additional warmth might be in order, eventually. A small package was wrapped in tissue paper off to the side of her place setting.

I bent down to place a white porcelain bowl of Campbell's alphabet soup in front of her. "Your first course, madam," I intoned with a wry smile on my face. Bella giggled. The lilting Portuguese lyrics momentarily surged over the speakers of the stereo system. I chuckled to myself. The music lent an ironic sophistication to the evening.

Bella ate hesitantly in front of me. I loved to watch her eat; her lips, her tongue, the small muscles bobbing in her throat as she swallowed. There was something so delicate and tentative about it, as if she wasn't sure sustenance were proper.

When she was done, I replaced her empty bowl with a grilled turkey and cheese sandwich. I sat across from her at the table and watched as she carefully bit into the food. "It's good," she assured me with a small smile.

I reached my hand across the table to touch hers and traced softy across the top of her hand, drawing pictures with my fingertip. I drew her eyes as I saw them for the first time in the cafeteria on her first day of school in Forks. I drew her silhouette as she hugged her knees and watched me that first afternoon we spent in the meadow. I drew her lips, slightly parted, as they would rest in sleep. Then I drew the contours of her breasts, their tips excited and hard. My mind spun back to this afternoon in the meadow and the sight of Bella's breasts, glistening in the rain.

I heard Bella sigh and my mind snapped back to the present. I felt conspicuous and a bit embarrassed that I couldn't simply touch her hand without straying to other thoughts. My brain had certainly been hijacked by something akin to hormones. I slowly lifted my eyes to hers. She smiled shyly as if caught in some illicit act as well. What I wouldn't give to know what was going on behind those chocolate brown eyes.

"Alice told me this was the last time we'd have together before the wedding," Bella began.

"Yes."

"It doesn't seem fare." She blinked quickly and a look of longing clouded her beautiful face.

"Bella, this isn't the end, it's the beginning, my love." The first tentative notes of a new song pierced the quiet night air. I had Bella in my arms in front of the fire, moving slowly to the music with her body pressed closely to mine. My heart was soaring as I held her delicately and moved in small circles to the gentle melody.

"Edward, I can't dance."

"You already are, meu amor," I smiled reassuringly. I watched the flames bring out the auburn highlights in her hair and savored the sweep of her waist as it met her hips. I put my lips to Bella's ear and very quietly sang along with the lyrics,

"_Quero vida sempre assim  
Com voce perto de mim  
E eu que era trista  
Descente deste mundo  
Ao encontrar voce eu conheci  
O que e a felicidade, meu amor" _

Bella sighed and rested her head against my chest. I buried my nose in her damp hair and inhaled her scent. It fanned flames deep within my body, and I pulled her closer. "Edward, that's beautiful. What does it mean?"

I touched my fingers to her chin and turned her head toward mine so that I could look into her eyes. They flickered brown and then red in the firelight. "_I want life to always be like this, with you right by my side. And I who was sad, having lost faith in this world, I found you, and then I knew, what happiness is, my love_." Bella's heart missed a few beats and then resumed its steady pace.

I slowly bent my head to Bella's, gazing through my lashes into her fiery eyes. My lips softly brush against hers, and I felt their warmth travel down my throat, joining the fire that was already burning from within. I pulled her body closer to mine again, and now there was no space between us. I felt her soft breasts press against my chest, while my growing erection strained against her taught belly. I took a deep breath and listened to the beating of Bella's heart, which was a little faster now, and the sound of her breathing. I let these signs of life remind me that she was human and that I needed to proceed with care.

Bella ran her hands through my hair and she pushed her lips more forcefully into mine, inhaling with each kiss. She pulled away from me just enough to whisper, "I wish I could drink your scent, or bathe in it, or-"

I didn't let her finish. My mouth was on hers and I lifted her off the ground so that her face was level with mine. The fire now raging inside my body was putting the flames in the hearth to shame. I counted the layers of fabric between my body and hers, there were too many. As if reading my mind, Bella began tugging at my T-shirt. I responded by pulling off my top, and laying her on her back in front of the fire. I wanted nothing more than to climb on top of her and tear off her robe, tear through the silk fabric beneath it. Instead, I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

When I opened them I was looking into Bella's eyes, and they were still flashing from brown to red in the firelight. I saw my future written there, and my stomach fluttered. I needed to do this right.

"I want to be clear about this evening, to make it perfect for both of us. We should talk about boundaries. Tonight, you'd like… an ending."

Bella smiled seductively. "An orgasm. As long as we're being clear."

I pressed my lips together to suppress what I thought might come across as a lascivious smile. "An orgasm, yes. But you would like to wait until after we're married for intercourse."

"I'm not the only one." I felt dangerously close to being swayed in another direction at the moment, so I kept my thoughts to myself.

Bella was glowing in the soft light, and her skin was dewy with perspiration from the heat of the fire on this sweltering August night. I wanted to lick the moisture from her body, to taste her. Before I knew it, I was speaking.

"I have just one question for you then," I murmured. I brought my face very close to hers and I could feel my eyes burning. My face was alit with the force of her presence. Bella's heart sputtered and her breath hitched in her throat. "How many orgasms would you like to have tonight?"

Bella bit her bottom lip and her eyes flashed, but she didn't answer. When she released her bottom lip it glistened and looked slightly swollen. I traced its contour with my finger, enjoying the texture of her soft wet flesh. Bella parted her lips and lightly kissed my fingertip and then took my finger in her mouth, gently sucking. I no longer merely wanted Bella, now I needed her desperately. My erection was straining, and my head was swimming, and I couldn't turn away. I was transfixed, rooted to this spot, a deer caught in this delicious headlight. Bella licked my finger, flicking her tongue over and around it. Then she looked me in the eyes through her long brown lashes and very firmly bit me. It was the sexiest thing I had ever witnessed, the most alluring bite I could ever imagine. I was blinded by desire, and I found myself braced on top of her, venom trickling into the back of my mouth.

No!

I was across the room and standing very still, shocked at my reaction. It had been weeks since I'd tasted venom in response to Bella's presence. I checked myself, but didn't feel any desire to drink her blood. It had been a reflex, but I was still thrown. I silently berated myself for risking Bella's life this way. I was a selfish and dangerous creature.

Bella stood up and moved silently towards me. She was walking carefully, without making any sudden moves, and it broke my heart. She stopped about two feet from me. "Edward, I'm so sorry. I don't want to hurt you, to torture you. We should stop. If you don't want-"

"Don't apologize." Her apology would be too much to handle. "I want this. I want this so much, you don't know." I'd ruined the night. It had been going so well. Now I was alone in a corner.

"I know it's different for you. You have a different want, or need. I get that."

"No, it's not that. My desire is very much that of a man for a woman. Bella, I don't just want you, I need you."

"You can have all the time you need, forever, we don't ever have to-"

"You've been too patient already." I looked down, scowling, and brought my hand up to hide my face. I still had the aftertaste of venom in my mouth and I could feel where it burnt my throat as I swallowed. I couldn't move. The room was silent except for the regular rhythm of Bella's heart, proving that against all odds, she was still alive.

I closed my eyes and took a breath before looking back at Bella. She boldly met my eyes, not afraid of the predator in front of her. I needed to trust myself like she trusted me, but right now I couldn't.

She reached her hand out, but didn't attempt to touch me. "Edward, my love. Please, whatever it was, I'm fine. Please." I didn't respond and she waited silently for three more seconds. Then she proceeded to sit down on the ground, folding her legs underneath her. "Let's just talk, OK? Come on. Let's sit. There's no reason to stand around all night."

I sat down, my face trained toward the ground.

"Tell me a story," Bella tried, "something I don't know about you. Maybe something from when you were young."

"Bella, I don't remember."

"No, I mean as a young vampire. Something silly."

My mind ranged through a number of stories and settled on one without much thought. "Well, when Emmett was a newborn we were living in the Upper Peninsula, and Emmett loved moose. There's plenty of blood and it makes for a good meal, but they don't put up much of a fight, at least not much of one to a newborn like Emmett. So we came up with a game where we would wait in the moose's drinking hole. When it would come to drink we'd spring up and pull it into the water. The excitement of the moose thrashing to stay afloat and fight us off, all the splashing… we'd fight each other off too..."

I stopped abruptly. I was talking without thinking again. How much more could I pervert this evening? I didn't bother to look at Bella. This was all wrong.

"That's more a story about Emmett. And you weren't really a newborn then." Bella seemed unfazed by the bloodbath involved in vampire games.

"I would have been eighteen. Your age, if you count vampire years as human."

"Well then, you were definitely not a newborn." If anything, she seemed a little defensive.

"Alright. When I was very young, before Esme even, I would often hang around concert halls. It was the best way to hear music. One night, I was milling around the ally during intermission and I saw the piano soloist walk outside to take a smoke and stretch his legs. Impulsively, I tied up his arms and legs, and stuffed his tie in his mouth. I went on and performed for the second half. At first everyone was alarmed, but by the end I received a standing ovation. I didn't stay for the applause to end. I just walked through the back door, untied the pianist and went back home to Carlisle."

I looked up at her, a trying to suppress a reluctant grin. "I was awful."

"Yes, you were terrible!" Bella smirked. "I like that. It makes it easier to deal with how perfect you are now." I snorted a little at this idea. Perfect. Right.

"Now you. Tell me a story I don't know."

"I don't have as much history to tell. You know absolutely everything."

"I find that unlikely."

"Hmm," her eyes darted as she stared at the wooden floor, as if the story of her life were written there and she was looking for the right chapter.

"Well, when I was eight I would go out the wash behind our house. I'd pick these desert weeds, some kind of succulent I think. They were thick and had joints, and had fluffy white hairs on top. To me, they looked like people. I would use them to act out whatever book I was reading."

I smiled picturing a young Bella with a cast of cacti in front of her, staging _The Secret Garden_ or _The Little Princess_.

"And sometimes, they would just become a boy and a girl, Lionel and Ella. Ella would always have the worst ideas, and she'd make Lionel do some really dangerous stuff. He always got in trouble, got hurt, sometimes he died."

"And let me guess, Ella always came to the rescue."

"No, she never did."

"Why not?"

Bella took a few seconds to consider this. "I don't know. I guess he wasn't hers to save."

"I'm yours, you know. I was always yours. To have, to save."

Bella looked slightly confused. The crease between her eyes became more prominent. "Of course. And I'm yours."

"But not to save, never to save."

"You're always saving me."

"It's not the same." I looked at Bella, sitting just a foot from me, fearless, kind, understanding. "You're really going to marry me, aren't you?"

"Absolutely. And you're really going to make love to me, aren't you?"

"If there's any possibility, I will. I want it so much, Bella."

"So tell me what you wanted to do tonight. We don't have to do anything. Just tell me, like I told you."

"Well, I wanted to give you a gift."

Bella's shoulders fell and she looked a little dismayed. "Oh, that's easy."

It had certainly never been easy to give this girl a gift before. I was to the dining room and back in less than two seconds. I sat down and held the package out to her. Bella leaned forward to take it from me, intentionally brushing her fingertips across my hands as she did so. An electric current moved between us, like a circuit had been reestablished.

She carefully tore at the tissue paper and held the heavy leather-bound book in her hands. "It's beautiful."

"It's the first English translation of Arabian Nights, to remind you of this month we've spent together, the best nights of my life. However, I look forward to many more than one thousand and one."

"Have the ten nights we talked about at the campsite already been replaced? Just like that?"

"No, not all ten. But there are definitely a one or two substitutions in the top five." I began to number nights in my mind and looked across the floor at Bella. Her eyes gazed past me, unfocussed, and I knew that she was doing the same. I wanted to take her in my arms, but held back.

It only took a moment for her to smile and blush. The smile widened as she looked back to me. "OK, no more games Mr. Cullen. That was very clever, but tell me, really. Tell me one thing you wanted me to do for you this evening."

"I wanted to see what you're wearing under my bathrobe."

And without a word Bella stood up and untied the robe. She slipped it off of her shoulders, and let it fall to the ground in front of me. I drew in a breath and held it before slowly lifting my eyes from the floor. Her legs were long and shapely, and her thighs were hardly hidden by the skimpy fabric. The soft blue silk hung on her hips, accentuating her small waist. The fabric flowed gracefully from the tip of each of her nipples and the creamy pale skin of her chest emitted rosy glow in the firelight. She was beyond beautiful and she was going to be my wife.

"Bella, you are stunning."

"Is this all you want, then?"

"No, not even close," I admitted as I stood to my feet in front of her.

"What else?"

Images assaulted me involuntarily. Bella naked on top of me, Bella, on my bed, wrapping her limbs around me, Bella in the meadow as I entered her, Bella walking down the aisle glowing in a wedding dress. I closed my eyes tightly and willed myself back to the present.

I shook my head. "Not until after the wedding."

"Isn't there something, anything, else you want before then? Just words, we don't have to do anything."

I swallowed out of habit. But there was nothing in my mouth to swallow, no saliva since I was human, and no venom now either. "Edward?"

"You could touch me." It was almost a whisper and I wasn't sure if Bella heard.

But she took a tiny step in my direction, then another, and slowly reached her hand to touch my elbow. Bella tilted her head to the side, still looking into my eyes and then I saw a flicker of recognition. Her eyes darted downward and then back to my face so quickly, another human might not have caught it. She blushed, but smiled boldly.

"Oh. I want that too." The redness of her cheeks bled to her ears. "I mean, I want to touch you too, you know, I have wanted that." Finally shy, she looked down, biting her bottom lip and holding her hands behind her back. The effect was breathtaking. With her hands behind her back her breasts jutted out and the silk chemise shimmered in the firelight.

"But, you would have to show me. I've never-"

I gathered Bella into my arms and ran my hand over her lower back, marveling at the sensation of silk against skin. She brought her lips to mine and whispered, "You're not going to hurt me." Her kiss was firm and she ran her hands up and down my back before bringing them to rest on my backside.

I followed her lead and let my hands trail from her back, to her hip, and then over her beautiful ass. I rubbed the fabric back and forth, teasing my senses before I let the silk slip over my hand. I grabbed her bare bottom and gently squeezed. Bella whimpered, her lips still on mine.

We were on the couch in front of the dying fire. Bella smiled as the quick movement registered in her mind. She was on her back, and I was holding myself over her. Our lips were still touching.

I closed my eyes, took a breath, and listened to the steady pace of Bella's heart. I would use its sound to keep me focused; I had to be for her. And here with me on top of her, Bella's heart was beating regularly. Even now. Another sign that she trusted me more with each day. I would earn that trust. I took another breath.

"Bella, be still." I kissed her lips softly. My hands trailed from her face, down over her breasts. Her heart quickened and she arched her back just slightly at my touch.

"And no biting," I whispered with my lips still touching hers. She closed her eyes and breathed deeply. I reciprocated and my body ached as her intoxicating scent wafted through the air. It steadied me and kept me alert, filled me with desire to have her and to protect her.

I placed my lips back on hers; so soft and swollen with the kisses we had exchanged all day and all night. Pink, soft, and wet. My hand trailed over her abdomen and felt the quiver of her pulse there, then over her hip and along her thigh. I felt her body shudder, but knew instinctively that it wasn't from the cold. A month ago I would have wrapped her in a blanket and moved away.

I loved how this warm journey across Bella's body. It sent sparks flying from my fingertips. I found the edge of her negligee and my hand moved across her bare leg.

"Edward."

She couldn't know what it did to me to hear her say my name like that. It had been breathed more than spoken. It was a whisper of encouragement and pleading. My hand glided up between her legs.

"Is this what you want?" It came out more coolly than I had planned.

"Please. Touch me."

And with that my fingers were there. The soft subtle folds of her skin radiated warmth and the perfume of her desire had me biting my bottom lip to remain composed. I stroked each curve, each fold. Bella's breathing accelerated, I felt the muscles in her legs tense, and she wrapped her arms around my neck.

I ran my fingers over her again and Bella shuddered. And like a pearl, I found what I was looking for. I pressed and rubbed there, rolling her firm nub gently between my fingers. Little moans and whimpers escaped from Bella's parted lips and she began to pant. I felt heat radiate out from her at this point, and she became moist with my touch. I ached with desire and rubbed myself against the edge of the couch. I wanted it to be Bella; I wanted to bury myself in it, in her.

"Edward."

I was electrified every time my name passed through her lips. I tugged a little harder, and rubbed her damp center. With my other hand I gently grasped her thigh, to pull her legs apart. She trembled and arched her hips toward me.

"Bella," I whispered, "Bella."

"Edward."

Be careful. Be gentle. Remember she is human. Remember not to hurt her. I repeated these words, changing the order so I had to think about them with each repetition. Her face was flushed. Don't hurt her. Her hand wound its way through my hair. Be careful. I laid my head on her abdomen and felt her pulse thumping in my ear. Be gentle. I slid my fingers deep within the moist folds of Bella's flesh. Her body quivered and she sighed. Don't hurt her. Her breathing came faster and faster, her fingers tried to dig into my scalp.

I watched goose bumps rise on her skin as my cold breath swept over her. And then her whimpers and moans came quicker and louder. "Edward." She was begging. I gently curled my fingers inside of her, searching. "Edward!" I pushed my erection into the couch, directed my force on the inanimate object. Bella shuddered underneath me, moaned and tugged at my chest. I moved my face back to hers and crushed her lips with a kiss, smothering her soft cries of pleasure. I could feel her muscles pulse around my fingers. Eventually she ducked her head into the crook of my neck, sighing.

I laid back on the couch, and pulled her towards me, softly kissing her neck, her cheek, her ear. Bella sighed again.

"Are you OK? Did I hurt you?"

"Was it too much?"

We questioned each other in unison, and then answered at the same time as well.

"I'm wonderful."

"That was exquisite."

I stroked Bella's cheek. "You first. How was it?"

"Do you even have to ask? It was fabulous. It was mind-altering. It was sensational." Bella threw her arms around me and pulled herself on top of my chest. Her hip brushed against my rock solid erection. "Oh." She rocked back and forth playfully. I felt myself throb at the touch.

"Bella."

"Shh." She put a finger to my lips and I licked it." Bella chuckled.

Her hot little hand swept over my chest and trailed down to the waistband of my pants. I held my breath. Her hand lingered there, leaving a trail of warmth in its wake. I closed my eyes, enjoying the sensation, but then had to open them again, not wanting to miss a second. She untied the drawstrings and I felt her fingers hesitantly reach for my hip. After that landmark was established, she swept her hand toward my midline. She touched me and I hissed.

"Oh."

I could feel that touch in my toes; I felt it in my chest. I grabbed the cushions of the couch. Very gently, like a hot feather, Bella's fingertips ran the length of my penis, from tip to base and back. "Oh, you get wet too." Her fingers twirled in pre-cum, and then swept down toward the base. "You're so cold, I mean especially here. Where I'm the warmest, you're the coldest. This is going to be intense."

Then her fingers circled me and very gently squeezed. I clawed the couch.

"Is that?"

"Amazing," I gasped.

And from there, Bella's hand carried me off, beyond words, to a place filled with sensation, light and love. My love.

We both lay spent on the couch in front of the dying fire. I ran my hand over Bella's cheek and felt goose bumps tremble to life at my touch. I retrieved the bathrobe and tucked it around her. It was very dark in the house. "I love you Bella."

"I love you too, Edward." Her brown eyes flickered in the dark. "Now would you please take me to bed already?"

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**Now we're in the home stretch. Only a few more chapters to go. I live for your reviews! xoxo, Marie**


	23. Confessions

**Twilight isn't mine, the characters aren't mine. And I hope no one's disappointed if some of the facts have been bent to fit this little story of mine. **

* * *

OK, its confession time.

Confession number one: I know exactly what happened last night in front of the fire. I know, I know, I promised Edward about privacy. But there are three reasons that I feel completely fine about it. First of all, they were in the family room. What goes on in there should be considered fair game. Second of all, I've put quite a bit of myself into this whole plan. I'm invested in the outcome. At this point, if things go wrong, I'm going to have to act quickly to fix it all. There are only a couple days left before the wedding. Thirdly, how else would I know about that song? Quiet Night, Quiet Stars, is perfect for Edward and Bella. It was a stroke of genius on Edward's part. It's like the song was written for them. He's smoother than I would have given him credit for. Maybe he didn't need so much help after all. No, who am I kidding? Anyway, now they can dance to it for their first dance at the reception. See, there's a method to my madness.

And to answer your next question: No, I have no idea what went on after Edward carried Bella up to the bedroom. I'm very proud of myself for that. I'm dying to take a little peak. And before you get all, "Eww, he's your brother," on me, let me explain. Bella is my best friend, but she's way too shy to share all the details. And well, while Edward is my brother, he's been totally celibate for his entire century-long life. Wouldn't you be just a little curious? Especially in this family where our overly acute sense of hearing, sight and smell leaves nothing to the imagination?

Confession number two: I lied to Chief Swan so that Bella could stay with Edward. Not only that, but I got my parents to lie too. Please don't judge them too harshly for lying to Charlie. I told them that Edward and Bella needed this time. They trust me, and they want Edward to be happy. I won't go as far as saying Edward is their favorite, but he was their first. You know how it is with first children, the whole wonder and newness of being parents. To see Edward unhappy for so long has been really hard for them. They felt like maybe it was something they did. Parents always feel that way, vampire and mortal alike I guess.

While we were at Charlie's house I picked up a change of clothes for Bella, and drove her car back to our house. Sure it would make sense for me to drive her back tomorrow. But we're staying away as long as possible, to give them every last minute. She'll be lucid enough to drive, even without any sleep. But she'll be just disoriented enough to forget about the fitting. OK, OK, you got me. Bella won't get any sleep. I really don't know anything else. Would I lie?

Confession number three: I didn't fill up Bella's tank with gas, even though it's nearly empty. She has to get used to people looking at her. She's marrying into the Cullen family after all. So she has to drive to town to get gas, it's not the end of the world.

Anyway, after stopping at Bella's house, and then dropping off her stuff back at our place, Carlisle and Esme came out hunting with me. It was a pretty nice thing to do, considering they just came back from hunting themselves. Of course, they had a few questions of their own that only I could answer.

Confession number four: I don't tell my parents everything, especially when it comes to situations like this. The council hates Carlisle, even if they don't show it. They are more afraid of him than anything. He's the only one that can bring them down. If I tell him anything more than the bare minimum to put their mind at ease, the Volturi will be here quicker than Edward can round a baseball diamond. Quicker than Emmett could kill a bear. Quicker than Jasper can turn me on. You get what I'm saying.

Luckily I could tell them honestly that Emmett, Jasper and Rose are alive, and they're coming back as we speak. They guessed that they were working for the Volturi with only minimal hinting on my part. They know it had something to do with Edward and Bella and their happiness. That's as far as I would go, except to give them the details of their return flight. I didn't have to say much else, because Jasper called right after that.

The sound of Jasper's voice after two weeks was enough to turn me into a jabbering limbic core, just some raw nerve endings with a voice. We said everything and nothing. It went something like this,

"Jasper!"

"Alice."

"Jasper!"

"Alice."

"Are you alright?"

"You know I am."

"I mean..."

"I'll be better when I'm with you."

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be. It was you that got me through it. I could never have done it without you."

"You would never have to."

"And then I'd be less of a man."

"Jasper."

"I'll be home soon."

"I know."

"I should probably talk to Carlisle and Esme."

"I don't want to let you go."

"You'll have me soon enough."

I'm so proud of my honey, my soldier boy, my terminator. I know, I know, I have pet names, and they're not pretty. (I'll spare you the others.) He stayed true to me and he held himself back from drinking human blood. Really, I never had any doubt about him and that evil slut, Sakhmet. I could have told you he wouldn't give in to her, whether or not I could see the future. And if I ever get my hands on her she better watch out. But there was always a chance that he wouldn't hold out when tempted with human blood. That's the way the future works sometimes, there's more than one possibility.

I can't wait to have Jasper back in my arms. I want to see him and kiss his wounds, kiss of few hundred other spots on his body. We'll have one night for that. Yes, you heard me right, one night. Why? I'll get to that in just a minute.

Confession number five: These next two days before the wedding are not going to be easy ones for the Cullen clan. Nothing like the Volturi, but more like the trauma of in-laws meeting in-laws. I try my best, but sometimes there's no way around things. The best solution I could figure out was to give Bella and Edward this time together.

Up until now it's been pretty simple for the two of them. Emmett's been away, so there's been no teasing. Rosalie's been away, so Bella feels more at ease. And I'm their faithful cheerleader. "Rah, rah guys, you can do this!"

But here's what's going to happen over the next two days leading up to the wedding. The first night that Renee and Phil are here there's a family dinner. I know about the weather, so I insisted on making reservations for after sunset. But Charlie doesn't want to wait until eight, so he makes them for six o'clock instead. We're going to be late, and half the family is going to be missing. There's really no good excuse for that one. " My brothers and sister will be back in time," I assure everyone. But it's suspicious. Then, of course, we're not going to eat much. None of these things endears us to Bella's family.

Charlie is going to make a point of inviting Billy Back. I can't figure out why Billy even comes. I can't figure out anything about the wolves. That really bugs me. (Of course, Billy's not a real wolf. It skipped a generation in his case. So I know he's going to be there, but his motivation is still baffling.) Billy's presence has at least half the people at the table thinking about Jacob. It's pretty uncomfortable, especially for Edward and Bella.

After dinner we'll all go back to Chief Swan's house where Charlie and Phil open some beers and throw around a baseball. Edward and Carlisle don't drink anything, and politely decline baseball. If you've ever seen a vampire with a baseball, you know why.

When Edward, Carlisle, Esme and I pile up into the car, we're not Phil's favorite people. Renee is surprised at how awkward it was, since Bella is so head over heels for Edward and the rest of our family. Charlie is resigned to never getting Edward. Edward is pretty morose on the way home. He can hear all of these thoughts. And there's something else.

I can't read minds, but I think I've pieced it together. After we leave and Renee and Bella are having their sleep over, Renee is going to tell Bella that Phil wants to have a baby. Renee is really considering it. Bella would be a big sister. Renee and Phil must be thinking about it constantly. I'm pretty sure that there's something about this baby talk that will really upset Edward. This puts him in a bit of a mood before he visits Bella the night before the wedding.

So, can you imagine if he hadn't spent the night with Bella? I don't have to imagine; I've seen it. Edward would spend the next day by himself, I'd have to send Jasper and Emmett to get him to the wedding on time, and there would definitely not be any consummation of Bella and Edward's status as man and wife. Everything I do has a purpose. Trust me. Really, everyone should.

Confession number six: The bachelor party is a cover. The story is that Emmett and Jasper are taking Edward out to hunt. But we all know Edward doesn't need any hunting, he's been drinking deer like it was going out of vampire style. They need to get him alone to let him read their minds. He needs to do this before the wedding. It gets ugly if he finds out about the Volturi any later than that. It puts some serious kinks in the wedding ceremony, and don't even think about a honeymoon.

The bachelor party is also the reason that Jasper and I have to wait to be together. I'm cool about waiting. Weddings make people do things in bed they wouldn't think of otherwise. Plus, it makes it all lovely dovey too, like icing on a Jasper cupcake.

Confession number seven: This isn't the end. The day after the wedding it's off to work again. And this time there will be no reason for me to send Jasper out alone. I'm never letting him do anything like that without me again.

Back to work? Right. Well you didn't think Jane was going to give up that easy did you? She was almost annihilated. She hates us now more than ever. I've got the wedding announcement ready. Hey, it worked last time with the invitation, kind of. OK, it didn't work at all. But it could have, there was always that possibility. And there's the possibility that it might work again. I don't even want to think about the alternative.

I love Edward. And I love Bella too. I've been pushing for this from the very beginning. No way I'm going to let anything come between them now.

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**A/N: This isn't the end, it's almost the end. There's the bachelor party of course. We've got to at least get that out of the way.**

**Now please, show me the love! Tell me if you like it, tell me if you don't. I can take it like Jasper can take Sakhmet.**

**Also, if anyone feels short-changed after Chapter 22 (Last Night Part III), I may put out a separate story and take our hero and heroine from dusk until dawn, so to speak. It just didn't belong here, somehow. Let me know if you'd be interested, or if you've had enough already.**

**Finally, I did all of this without a beta. I'd love to have someone for the next story. Please let me know if you or anyone you know would be interested.**

**Thanks! Marie**


	24. Long Night Redux

**This chapter contains direct quotes from Breaking Dawn. I'm not trying to pass them off as my own, they are Stephenie Meyer's of course. I'm just trying to honor the original chapter, while I rework it a little to fit Edward & Bella's ahem, evolved relationship. Twilight's not mine either. Neither are it's characters. I just dwell in their world from time to time. **

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"Do you mind, Bella? I just can't wait to talk to Phil."

"No, mom, you should go." I hoped I didn't sound too excited. I hoped I didn't answer too quickly.

I searched Renee's face for any sign of chagrin, but she only seemed excited to get back to the hotel. She was quickly packed and out the door, and practically jumped into her rental car. I waved as she drove away and then did a little jumping of my own. I ran up the stairs two at a time to the bathroom, cast my clothes off and had myself in the shower before the water could warm up. I'd shower, wash my hair, shave my legs and call Edward. Maybe Alice was wrong. Maybe Edward and I had tonight too.

When I got out of the shower I glanced in the mirror again to see if I looked different. I'd been doing this for the past two days. I don't know what I expected to see. Maybe something permanent, like those golden flecks in Edward's eyes. Maybe I'd look older or more sophisticated. Well there was a little change. I ran my hand over the small purple mark on my inner thigh. That was new. My heart skipped a couple of beats just looking at it.

And then I turned around, looking over my shoulder. There was a small red mark on my right butt cheek. It was thumb-sized, Edward thumb-sized. I hoped I could keep that out of his sight; he probably wouldn't like it. My heart went wild again. Just the thought that I was hoping to keep Edward from looking at my naked butt cheek was enough to force me to take a seat on the toilet.

I looked at the baggy cotton T-shirt and the plaid drawstring pajama bottoms that were stowed in the bathroom. They were definitely a step down from the other night. My mind strayed back to the look on Edward's face as he admired me in the blue silk slip. That memory still made me tingle all over. Unfortunately, I'd never get to wear it again. I mulled my options over and pieced together something I thought might be remotely sexy. Renee had just bought me a white tank top with lace straps. I could wear it with my polka-dotted boy shorts that had the little bow and lace trim.

That decided, I quickly brushed my hair, tied a towel around myself and almost skipped across the landing. I wanted to get Edward here as soon as possible. I opened the door and flung myself into the room and almost tripped over Edward in the process.

"Edward!" He held me in his arms to keep me from falling. Then he just held me for the sake of it, I think.

"Bella." He looked over my clothing, or lack thereof. "Alice told me Renee wasn't here. I have just a couple of hours. I came over as fast as I could."

"A couple hours?" I could see there was something not quite right in the way Edward was holding himself. His eyes were dull, like bronze that needed polishing, and the corners of his mouth were pulled down into a small frown. What could possibly be wrong after the other night?

"Jasper and Emmett are taking me out before the wedding."

"Like a bachelor party? For real?" Then another thought hit me. "They're back?"

"Alice is picking them up at the airport right now."

"And you have to go?"

"I haven't seen my brothers in weeks. There are a few things I have to ask them. Something about their absence doesn't seem quite right."

Edward peered carefully down at me, and I knew him well enough to see something lurking just behind his composed façade. It was encased delicately, and the smallest tap would break down the wall that held it there, unspoken. I wanted more than anything to hold Edward in my arms, to spend the remaining time we had in my bed, but that would be selfish. If something were bothering him, it was best to get it out in the open before our wedding day.

I reached up to brush his cheek with my hand. "Edward, what's the matter?" That was all it took. I watched the delicate partition crumble, and the smooth look on Edward's face crumbled too.

A multitude of emotions swirled in his caramel eyes, barely hidden by the small stars that swam there these days. He blinked. I knew him well enough now to also know that this was his substitute for tears. "Bella, I needed to be here to make sure, one last time, that you are certain that this is what you want."

His eyes were searching my face, but I didn't understand.

"Are you certain that you want to marry me? That you want to be like me? One of us?"

"You've got to be kidding." I knew it wasn't the right response as soon as it passed my lips. He had never been more serious, and my response seemed to cause physical pain. "Edward, I've never been more sure of anything in my life. You know my heart. Why are you asking this now?"

Edward let go of me and took a few steps to look out the window at the darkening night sky. "Yesterday was all wrong. Everything about it called attention to our differences. It's been easy to forget lately."

"We're not really that different."

"Bella." He turned to me and shook his head, but didn't bother to argue. I was at his side as soon as my feet could take me there.

"Edward, I love you for who you are. I don't pretend you're human. I love all of you. I don't mind the differences."

"Could you say the same for Charlie, Renee and Phil? They don't like me, or my family at all. And Bella, that's a normal human response. I shouldn't want anything more, but I do. If not for me, then for you."

"You think because you didn't eat, or drink, or play baseball, that we shouldn't get married? You think that my family wouldn't like you because of that? That's ridiculous. You have to know how silly that is. You can read their thoughts, so you must know."

"And then Renee and Phil, what about that?"

"You mean about Phil wanting a baby?"

Edward let his eyes fall to the ground. The nod of his head was barely perceptible.

"I don't know what to think about that. I guess I feel like Renee will change her mind and take up rock climbing before she even has a chance to ovulate."

"But you could have a sibling. You could be leaving that behind."

"I'm giving up relationships with real parents for you. A potential sibling doesn't compare."

"Bella," he whispered, "are you really ready to leave your family?"

"You are my family." I grasped his hand. Edward curled his fingers around mine, his eyes still staring intently at the floorboards.

"About family…" Edward's voice trailed off. Then he cast his eyes out the window and started again. "Bella, I just don't…" Edward always had the right words for everything. When he couldn't continue it often struck me as endearingly human. Tonight though, I was a little frightened.

Then Edward turned to look into my eyes and there was a deep longing there. "Bella," he started again, "do you remember when we told Charlie we were getting married? And he thought you were…pregnant?"

I nodded, but didn't know where he was going with this.

"I just wish…well, I wish he'd been right."

I gasped.

"I hate taking that away from you."

"Edward, you're not taking anything away from me. Having a child is not something I want right now. Esme and Rosalie felt this need after they were changed, but it was something they wanted when they were human. If I change before I feel the need for a child, I may never want one. But if there's a day when we both want this, than we can adopt like Esme did."

Edward looked at me plaintively and it hit me, the knowledge nearly knocking me breathless. "You want a child."

"Bella, this is something very new for me. Being with you has uncovered emotions I didn't know I had. I desire your body instead of your blood. I want to treat you like a human man would treat a woman. I long to be part of this world again. And this, this newest desire… I was watching us through Esme's eyes, and Bella, we looked like a young couple in love."

"Edward, that's what we are."

Edward's eyes flashed with golden fire. "Don't fool yourself too, Bella. Not tonight." But then he caught himself and continued in a gentler tone, "When I looked through Esme's eyes, suddenly I wanted everything that a young couple might want. I want a life together, marriage, a house of our own, and to know you intimately. The natural progression of that is a child, someone half me and half you. Then the picture would be complete."

Unbidden, that picture presented itself to me. I saw Edward and I holding a little boy with a mop of coppery curls and emerald eyes.

What Edward was saying was beautiful. And suddenly all of my desires momentarily flip-flopped in my head. If there were any way that I could change Edward into a human, instead of me into a vampire, I would have. I just wanted him. I wanted to make him happy. I wanted desperately to give Edward whatever I could. But I knew there was no way for this to happen.

"But Edward, there's no way. You and I, we can't…" Edward turned away from me again. I saw the movement his long lashes made as he blinked into the dark sky.

"Does this mean that you don't want me then? That you want to take it all back? Because if that's-"

"Bella!" Edward turned so fast that the air around us shook. He looked shocked. "Never suggest that I don't want you."

"I know how it feels to want something that seems impossible." It was the best I could do, but I knew my words were woefully inadequate.

"I shouldn't have burdened you with this. I can't seem to keep any of my thoughts to myself these days."

"I think maybe that's a good thing in a relationship."

Edward gazed out the window toward the tree line. I touched my hand to his cheek, and he let me turn his head. "Edward, we have what, less than two hours now, before you're meeting Jasper and Emmett? I don't want to leave it like this. I love you, you love me, and we're getting married, tomorrow. Isn't that something to be happy about?" I stopped, took a breath, and tried to strike a tone of nonchalance, "Or are you trying to get out of this Mr. Cullen?"

Edward's face softened and he smiled weakly. "I like when you call me Mr. Cullen. Shall I reciprocate and call you Ms. Swan?"

"You didn't answer my question, Mr. Cullen. Are you or are you not trying to get out of marrying me?"

Edward looked deep into my eyes and held my shoulders in his hands. "I've been waiting a century to marry you Ms. Swan. There is nothing that I want more in this world than to have you for a wife." Edward's eyes were burning and he rubbed my cheek with his thumb.

I smiled, relieved. "Then starting tomorrow you may call me Mrs. Cullen."

That did it. Edward couldn't hide his happiness and his eyes glittered. "I like the sound of that even better." He ran his hand along my bare arm, and then traced the edge of the towel along my chest. "No regrets about the other night?"

"Oh my God! Of course not!" I pulled myself onto my tiptoes and was about to go in for a kiss, but then hesitated. "What about you? Do you have regrets? Was that part of your mood?"

Edward held my sides in his hands. I noticed he was now focused on the towel instead of my face. "No." He seemed to catch himself and looked up to meet my eyes. There was no sadness there now; they burned with another emotion entirely. My whole body tingled in response. "In fact, there's been another addition to the top five."

Reassured, I almost dove, lips first into Edward's waiting arms. His cool hands were immediately on my thighs, easing the towel higher. They made their way around to my bottom and gently squeezed.

"Excuse my language, but there's no better way to say this. Do you know what an amazing ass you have?"

I'm sure my face turned beet-red. "I never thought much about it."

"I think about it quite often." I loved it when Edward talked dirty. He was still so proper, even when he said the most indecent things.

Running my hands over Edward's back, I became quickly disappointed that there was fabric between my hand and his skin. I started undressing him in my mind, but then reminded myself that could probably undress him for real. "It seems a little unfair that I'm the only one in the room that's half dressed," I teased, moving to undo the top button of his shirt.

"Wearing a towel counts as partially dressed these days?" Edward chuckled. He kept his hand on my…ass, while I unfastened the buttons on his shirt. Edward shrugged off the shirt before moving his hands back under the towel to caress my waist and gently stroke my hips. I ran my hands over the rock solid contours of his chest and abdomen. My head started to swim, but I was proud that my heart soldiered on with remarkable regularity.

"You usually come back to your room dressed for the evening. I was trying to be a gentleman. It was very difficult not to join you in the shower."

The room was spinning around me as I pictured Edward and I in the tiny shower stall. I braced my hands against his chest to keep myself from toppling over. Now my heart was definitely sputtering. I was also keenly aware of the growing dampness between my legs, and that I had nothing on besides a towel. It was too much. I sat down on the edge of the bed. "Can I take a rain check on that?" I gasped, trying to look poised.

"Absolutely." Edward sat next to me and began to kiss my earlobe. "Shall I excuse myself so you can dress?"

"No!" I said with a little too much urgency in my voice. I threw my arms around him as if I were strong enough to hold him in place. "Please don't go."

"Hmm. You don't feel the need to get dressed?" His hand glided through the folds of the towel and ran over my abdomen as his kisses moved from my ear to my mouth. "I love your skin right here. It's so soft and delicate, it smells so sweet, and your pulse is everywhere and nowhere at once. It's one of my top ten favorite places to touch you."

My heart leapt. "You have a thing for lists, don't you?"

"In the past two days I've had a lot of time on my hands, and only one person on my mind. Would you like to know the other nine?"

I turned to look at him with wide eyes, but found it somewhat impossible to marshal a response.

Edward pressed his lips together and his eyes glittered. "I'll make my way through the list slowly. You tell me if you need me to stop." With that he gently wound his arm around me and lowered us both onto our backs.

Edward leaned on his elbow and brought his face to mine. My heart fluttered as he beamed at me with buttery gold eyes and softly kissed my lips. "Three." He kissed me again and licked my bottom lip before flicking his tongue into my mouth.

Edward pushed my wet hair behind my ears and inhaled deeply. Then placing his lips against my ear he whispered, "You're tantalizing when you're wet." I was suddenly even wetter. He kissed and licked at my earlobe, then tenderly bit me there with his lips covering his teeth. "Nine."

Soft butterfly kisses rained down from my earlobe toward my shoulder, and then Edward rubbed his nose along my collarbone toward the midline of my neck. He stopped to place a kiss in the hollow of my throat and took a deep breath. "Your skin is so thin here, it vibrates with your pulse and with every breath. Eight."

I thoughtlessly ran my hands through Edward's hair and whimpered. He looked up at me. Watching him hovering, gazing up at me through those long lashes set all of my nerve endings on fire. "Too much?"

I swallowed. It took a great deal of energy just to shake my head no.

Edward chuckled. "You asked for it."

Edward kissed the spot over my heart very gingerly, and then laid his ear against it. "This is five," he murmured. "I could never get enough of number five. You have to know how much I love you if I'm willing to give up the music your heart makes. I would do anything for this sound. It's my lifeline, Bella. It tethers me to this world."

We lay there silently with Edward resting his head on my chest. The energy in the room changed, it was almost meditative now.

Slowly, with his head still over my heart, Edward loosened the folded edge of the towel and moved it aside to bare my right breast. His cold breath cascaded over the skin there, and I watched my nipple shudder to life. With his hand, Edward slowly traced its outline.

"Four," his voice was little more than a breath. He lowered his lips to very gently suck at the stiff peak of my nipple. I couldn't help arching my back in response and Edward's eyes flashed up to meet mine. He pulled the towel away to expose half of my stomach.

"You already know about number ten." His fingers trailed down from my breast, over my ribs, to my navel. He kissed my stomach softly before his fingers hooked the edge of the towel there, uncovering my waist. I suppressed a shiver.

"This spot right here," Edward ran his hand from my waist to my hip and back, "this is magical. My hands fit perfectly here. This is seven." His large, cold hand cupped my hip. As he did this, Edward moved himself on top of me a little more and I could feel his ice-cold erection against my thigh. I rubbed my leg against him in response, and Edward closed his eyes and moved his hand very purposefully from my hip to the bed, grasping the sheets in his fist.

Then he looked up at me with glittering golden eyes, "Too much?"

"For who?" I asked glancing from his face to his fist and back. He chuckled.

Edward unclenched the sheets and slid his hand between the bed and my bottom. He massaged me a little bit and then pinched. "Oh!"

"Two," he whispered as he raised his head to gaze at me. "I wonder if I could get you to agree to never wear panties again, because the sensation of holding you here, like this, skin to skin, is…" Edward cupped my cheek as if to demonstrate, but his voice trailed off. His eyes were golden fire, swimming, intense. But then a more playful smirk teased at the corners of his mouth. "Well, I can't think of a word to describe it. But I hope you'll consider my request, nonetheless." His words turned my body to liquid and I felt wetness seep out from my center, coating my upper thighs.

Edward took his free hand and drew the towel completely away from the right side of my body. With my wet hair, damp towel, and Edward's cold touch, I began to notice a chill creep up my spine, and nip at my toes. But there was no way I was stopping him now.

Murmuring six, Edward slid his body between my legs and trailed his free hand from the inside of my knee to my thigh and back. His eyes caught there. Sighing, he placed his lips over the purple mark he made. He held my thigh with both of his hands and brushed his lips there. I realized that he was talking very fast and low between kisses and strained to hear what he was saying.

"My mark on you… to be able to… the most alluring… and your scent…" Suddenly his mouth was making its way up my thigh. I noticed that the towel was just barely concealing me and I ached for Edward's touch there, for his mouth, any part of him, for everything. Somewhere in the back of my head I heard myself moan.

Edward was licking my upper thigh, and I could hear a rumble building in his chest. My teeth were trying to chatter. I clamped my mouth shut. One of his hands brushed between my legs just enough to set me on edge. I shuddered with pleasure and from the cold. His fingers ran over me again and paused to tease my firm nub.

"One."

I squirmed and arched my hips toward him. He slid a long cool finger inside of me, and I could feel warm fluid leak onto his hand. Edward's mouth hovered over the spot where my thigh met my body. He licked and sucked at the tender crease and then he blew a cold breath between my legs. "Oh!"

But then my body betrayed me. My mouth had relaxed enough that my teeth began to chatter, and then my legs started to shake. Instantly alarmed, Edward was at my side. "Bella." He pulled the towel around me before leaping across the room to retrieve an enormous afghan. Before I could blink, I was wrapped in it and Edward was cradling my body in his arms.

He went to brush my cheek with his hand, but then pulled it away. "I got carried away."

"I didn't want you to stop."

"You have to tell me. Please, always tell me." He settled my body back down on the bed, and pulled another blanket over me.

"I wish I had a space heater like you did in your room."

Edward glanced around the room. "I'm surprised Alice didn't bring one over here as well."

"It wasn't you?"

"I'm not that devious. Alice has had far too much time on her hands with Jasper away."

"Maybe she'll butt out now that he's back."

"Don't hold you're breath, love."

I peered up at Edward. He was smiling sweetly, but there was still such concern in his eyes. He tucked the blanket firmly around my body and, satisfied that there was a thick wall of fabric between us, lowered himself next to me on the bed. He kissed my lips very softly.

"Bella," he whispered, "It's so hard to concentrate when we're with each other like this. If I let something so basic like the difference in our body temperatures slip my mind tonight of all nights, I'm worried about what I might forget when I'm finally inside of you. "

Hearing those words pass so simply from Edward's lips set my body on fire. But I realized this was not their desired effect. "Then let's just talk about what we need to do to make your side of this bargain happen."

"But Bella,"

I continued as if I didn't hear him. "So we need to think about temperature on the honeymoon. I think you had that covered long ago."

Edward seemed reluctant. "Yes, I've arranged for climate control."

"Tonight was my fault too. I knew I was getting cold, but I didn't say anything. I didn't want to stop either, you know. But, from here on I'll tell you. I promise. What else?"

"Temperature is the least of it. I have to make sure not to hurt you."

"What do you need for that?"

"That's not something you can help me with, Bella."

"Edward, we're in this together. I can tell you if something even remotely begins to hurt. And you?"

"I have to calculate my every movement to keep you safe."

"Is it worth it?" I couldn't help the question. It sounded akin to torture.

Edward's mouth pressed itself into a thin line to try to hide a smile. "I asked Carlisle the same thing not long ago. But by now I wouldn't think you'd have to ask." Edward's eyes were burning. "I've never been this happy, this satisfied in my existence. Being with you, there are no words, it's extraordinary."

I was beginning to feel reassured. I hoped Edward was too. "Anything else?"

"No biting." Edward chuckled. But then a shadow flickered across his face. "Bella, there may be blood."

Oh, right. "Edward, it's OK if, when that happens, you have to stop or leave or something. I understand if you have to get away. But I trust you and I know you won't hurt me. It's just something you might have to do to make yourself feel better. Just promise you'll come back and umm, finish what you start."

The look on Edward's face was one of surprise mixed with awe. "I don't deserve you."

"Is that it, then? Is that everything?" I felt a thin line of sweat trickle down my forehead. I hadn't realized how warm I was becoming while we talked and I started pealing off the top layer of blanket

"How are your feet?" he asked as he watched my actions.

I smiled at the double meaning in his words. "Toasty warm."

Edward raised his eyebrows, looking for more.

"Edward." I wrapped my hand around the back of his neck and brought my face very close to his. "I have no doubts, not a one. You are my future."

I saw tension roll off his shoulders with my reply. "And you are mine."

"That's all that matters. Everything else will work itself out, somehow. It has so far."

Edward smiled. "You don't know what this past month has done for me. I would never have believed that before. I would never have trusted myself with you, to be with you. You've brought out the best in me. I don't recognize myself when I look in the mirror."

"It's your eyes." I whispered.

"What?" Edward seemed confused.

"Those little gold flecks. They weren't there before. They changed one night after we…" I didn't finish. "I wish I'd had some kind of permanent change like that. I wish I could show on the outside the huge way you've changed me on the inside."

"Bella," Edward's eyes were soft and glowing, "Bella, my love." Then he smiled, almost like he wanted to laugh.

"What's so funny?"

"Do you know I've felt the same way?"

"What?"

"I've wished I could change for you. The way you get goose bumps, and Edward swept his hand over my arm to demonstrate. The way everything changes with my touch. He ran his hand under the blanket and touched my breast to demonstrate his point. I sighed audibly. He continued to tease me with his hand as he spoke, "The texture of your skin changes, the speed of your heart, the way you smell." Edward pressed his nose to the sensitive spot just behind my ear and inhaled.

He pulled his body gently on top of mine. "I love every human minute of being with you. I love the way you trust yourself, revealing yourself to me." He ran his hand underneath the afghan, along my thigh. "To think that you envied me my eyes."

"Edward, I'm completely humbled by the change I see in them."

"As I am by you." Edward brought his lips to my face and swept them over my mouth, before he let them settle there. Our kisses were soft and full of emotion. We certainly were two different creatures, but we were really so much the same. I wound my hands around Edward's back and pulled him closer. This time he didn't pull away. I loved to feel the length of his body against mine. I felt so safe and secure in his arms.

"I miss you already." I kissed his lips firmly.

"I wish I didn't need to leave." I felt his resolve to question Emmett and Jasper crumbling.

"Mmm." I pulled his face to mine again.

"That's it. I'm staying," he murmured.

"No, no. It's your bachelor party. You should go." But even as I said this I ran my fingers through his hair and I pressed my hand into the small of his back.

"Bachelor parties are designed for those who are sad to see the passing of their single days. I couldn't be more eager to have mine behind me. So there's really no point."

"True." I breathed. Maybe Alice was wrong. Maybe we could just have tonight. Could we call Alice and have her bring over the space heater after she got back from the airport? Could she get it through the window?

I began pulling the afghan from around my body, working to uncover myself. Edward raised his eyebrows in response.

"Well, practice makes perfect. We'll just be more careful this time."

"We should be fairly close to perfection by this point, then, shouldn't we?"

He held my cheek in his hand and traced my lips with his thumb as his mouth sought out my earlobe. I felt his erection pushing through one remaining layer of fabric, hitting precisely between my legs. My hips rose to meet him and I let out a small "oh."

But then his head snapped up. "Oh, for the love of all that's holy!"

"What's wrong?"

He gritted his teeth. "Apparently Emmett and Jasper are not going to let me bow out tonight."

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**A/N: Thanks for your patience! It took a little while to get this chapter into a somewhat presentable form. 'Somewhat' being the operative word there.**

**Please let me know if you thought it was presentable! I love reviews. **

**Just click that little green button!**

**Also, now that this is close to done, let me know where you want to see sequels go. I have ideas, but I love hearing yours too. **

**Thanks so much for reading...Marie**


	25. Reunion

**There are a few Breaking Dawn quotes thrown in here for the fun of it. They're not mine, they're Stephenie Meyers, as are Twilight and each of the characters in this story. **

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"Jazz!" Even to my eyes Alice was a blur as she raced across the airport terminal.

Jasper had been walking with us to the baggage area, looking around eagerly for any sign of Alice. When his eyes found her, he stopped in his tracks and it looked like the wind had been knocked out of him. He was vampire-still as Alice raced in our direction. She dove at Jasper, and he moved his arms just in time to catch her and hold her body to his. I noticed Alice trying to pull Jasper's body into hers with every muscle in her little arms, but he didn't move an inch. She pressed her forehead against his, and they stared silently into one another's eyes. Humans streamed around them like they were a piece of airport art.

"Is it really you?" Jasper finally gasped.

Alice shook her head yes and her grin took up most of her face. She wound her arms around Jasper's neck.

"I can't believe you're finally here," Alice whispered.

"I'll never leave you like that again."

"Thank God. If I ever ask again, tell me no."

"You won't ask again."

"You're right," Alice almost giggled with erupting glee.

They were still gripping each other; Alice's wound her legs around Jasper's waste. He seemed to be slowly melting in her presence. A slow smile crept across his face, and then he moved in to nuzzle Alice's ear. I glanced at Rose and shrugged my shoulders. "We could take a taxi. We could run. It's only two hundred miles."

Rose rolled her eyes and cleared her throat.

Jasper didn't move, but Alice cast a glance in our direction. She jumped off of Jasper, and pranced over to Rose and I, tugging Jasper along, her arm wound tightly around his shoulders.

"We did it!" Rose cheered. "Now can we finally go home?"

Alice pulled herself away from Jasper. It looked like two opposite ends of a powerful magnet were being pulled apart. You could see the force it took. She gave Rose and I a warm hug. "I'm so relieved that you're back and you're safe. I am so sorry. I had no idea what I was asking. You won't have to go, you know. Bella will be changed by then."

"Alice, it doesn't matter. Either way, Bella and Edward are in the clear."

Something flashed in Alice's eyes when I said that. Was it doubt? Oh God. "We did it, right? They're not coming to kill Bella, are they? They said she has until the end of the year. If they were lying-"

"Was this all for nothing, Alice?" Rose must have seen the look in Alice's eyes as well.

"No! The wedding is tomorrow. Bella is alive. It's all happening like it was supposed to. And just wait until you see Edward." Alice couldn't keep herself physically apart from Jasper anymore. She jumped back into his waiting arms. He seemed to have completely regained the ability to move, and he pulled her body into his, his eyes never leaving her.

Seeing Edward was something that I'd been dreading for the past thirty-six hours of travel. Well, except for the time I'd spent celebrating our victory with Rose. "Yeah, Alice, about seeing Edward. Maybe we could just pop in at the wedding. With all of the distraction, maybe he won't hear our thoughts. Maybe we could get away with it until after they get back."

Alice's head snapped in my direction. "No! You have to go tonight and tell him. He thinks you're taking him out for a bachelor hunting party."

"What?" Rosalie and I exclaimed in unison.

"If you wait until tomorrow, everyone's going to be anxious that you're still missing. He'll be all over your thoughts when he sees you. We can't do that to him on his wedding day. Not after all we've done to make sure it actually happens."

"All _we've_ done?" Rosalie challenged.

"You have no idea, Rose." Alice responded in a clipped voice.

"I'm going home. I need a shower, I need to wash my hair with real shampoo, and I need a dress for tomorrow."

"I've got one of those three items covered," Alice assured Rose in a more gentle tone.

"And I've got the other two," I offered, pulling her into my arms. I noticed that the four of us looked like newlyweds ourselves. It was hard to believe that it was Edward who was about to get married. Actually, I missed my brother and I really wanted to see him. I was dying to find out how things went with Bella while we were away, not that he was likely to say anything.

"Guys, Edward's waiting for you. He knows something's up." Alice looked back and forth between the three of us, some signs of stress were showing around the edges of her eyes, and in the way she clutched her fingers. It was just starting to dawn on me how much of a strain Alice must have been under too.

"Alice, do they know? Do any of them know?" I asked.

"Bella knows nothing and Edward knows next to nothing. He just suspects there's something I've been keeping from him. Carlisle and Esme weren't as easy because they weren't as distracted. I let them figure out just enough to put their minds at ease, but not enough to get them into trouble. They know we'll be able to tell them some day."

Jasper was gazing at Alice with pure admiration. "Edward doesn't know anything? I don't believe it. You're amazing."

Alice smiled up at him. "I am. Wait till you see him tonight, Jazz. He's so happy. It's like he's totally changed, even more than before. It will be so much easier for you to be around him. I wonder-"

"No!" Jasper interrupted.

I had watched the expression on Jasper's face change as Alice was chattering away. He clutched her in his strong arms and his eyes blazed, his face inches from hers. "I'm not going anywhere tonight." And then he kissed her forcefully, crushing her head to his with one hand, while he pulled her waist closer to his with the other. Alice didn't have a chance. Maybe Jasper had learned a thing or two from Sakhmet after all. They were all over each other. Luckily, since they moved with vampire speed, most humans probably only saw a blur.

"Emm, come on. Let's catch a cab and go home. Alice can fix things with Edward."

For about an eight of a second I was tempted to just turn and go. But I remembered the stressed out look on Alice's face just a moment ago and I knew that it had to be one of us. We were the ones that were there, we were the ones that should tell him. If it had to be tonight, well then it had to be tonight. "Rose, I should go. And if I value my life, I should bring Jasper too."

"What about me?"

"Someone needs to talk to Carlisle and Esme. And Alice probably has a million things to do tonight." Rose sighed loudly and crossed her arms across her chest. She could put on quite a show, but I knew how she felt deep down. I'd seen it first hand.

I walked over to the cloud of arms and legs that was my brother and sister and tapped on Alice's shoulder to try to get her attention. I got no response and nudged Jasper. I heard a growl start to form deep in his chest and knew I should probably bolt for the nearest exit. But distracting Jasper seemed to break the spell over Alice. She pulled herself away a bit and seemed to reclaim her bearings. "Baby, we can wait one more night. This is the last thing that needs to be done."

"Alice, don't make me let you go again."

"I'm not going anywhere except home."

Jasper growled again. Three teenage girls that happened to be walking by jumped a little and hurried past us, looking at the ground.

Alice stroked Jasper's chest and whispered in his ear. "I drove the Volvo here because it has the biggest back seat. We get to ride in it the whole way back."

Jasper pulled Alice into his body again. His mouth was on hers and his arms were clamped firmly around her back. Neither of them said another word, so I wasn't sure a decision had been made. But I saw him dig his hand into Alice's back pocket. He tossed the car keys and the parking ticket in my direction. We were going home.

On the ride back Alice came up for air enough to pass me a map detailing the best locations to find bear and mountain lion. "Thanks, Alice! If I ever have to drink from another goat again I'll tear _myself_ into small pieces." Rose playfully shoved me and rolled her eyes, but I was being pretty truthful.

"Hey Jasper, so are you coming or not?" I called out. But the only sound from the backseat was Alice giggling and the rustle of fabric against vampire skin. I turned up the stereo's volume to try to drown it out and give them some privacy.

As the city faded behind us and we passed onto the peninsula, I rolled down the car windows. The air here was sweet, salty and green. The moisture gave the air a weight it didn't have anywhere else in the world. I felt comforted as I watched the clouds seem to roll over the stars. I knew that we were in fact driving under the clouds, moving from one weather system to another, and I breathed deeply. I finally felt at ease. I was free; I was home.

We pulled up to the house and I jumped out of the car almost before it came to a stand still. I couldn't stay inside any longer. I don't know if it was the vampire in me, but I needed to be out in this night, in my territory. The need to hunt was overwhelming. I bounded over to Rose and pulled her into a tight embrace.

"I've got to go Rose."

"Don't you want to see Carlisle, Esme?"

I knew they'd want to see me, and I wanted to give Esme a hug to reassure her that I was OK. But I could see the scene play out in my mind almost as if I were Alice. I knew I'd be stuck there, pulled in. I needed to run, and Edward was as good an excuse as any."

"I can't take the time baby. I should go. I'll be back tomorrow. Please tell them I love them, and I'll see them soon."

And with a kiss, I turned and leapt over some underbrush and was racing through the wet forest toward the Swan's house. The feel of running through familiar trees, with familiar smells, helped to instantly release all of the pent-up stress that had accumulated over the past weeks on the road. The mist fell into my face, the evergreens brushed silently at my arms. I could run this path backwards and with my eyes closed. Forks was my home more than any other place I'd ever lived. I was back. I didn't want to leave again for as long as possible.

Suddenly I heard footfalls behind me. I spun around, ready to pounce. Instead, I was tackled and rolling on the ground, and something or someone very solid was on top of me. "Are you trying to get yourself killed, brother? You make it out of the desert, fight your way through an army of newborns, kill a Volturi guardsman, bargain with the council, and now you want to throw your life away by going to talk to Edward alone?"

Jasper jumped off of me with a swift motion, and I was on my feet too. "You might need me, you know."

"But what about Alice?"

"I'll always need her. But she's right. Tonight I should be here with you and Edward." I shook my head in disbelief as Jasper sprinted ahead and I had to race to catch up.

In another minute the pitched roof of Chief Swan's house came into view. I momentarily felt a little awkward about barging in on them this way, but then I stopped myself. This was Edward we were talking about. I might catch him with the top button of his shirt undone. I might catch him kissing Bella's cheek, or with his hand around her waist. However, the closer we came, the more terrified I was about his reaction when he heard what had really been going on this past month.

"Jasper, how should we tell him?"

"We? I thought I was just along to help with the mood."

"So this is all on me?"

"I think we should play through the past month in our minds. Don't leave anything out. Just try to tell the story from beginning to end."

"I don't even know when the beginning was anymore. In Riyadh? With Valentino in Volterra?"

"Actually, I think it was the last time we were out hunting together."

We came closer to the house and I saw that Bella's window was half open, and the lights were on. Of course they were on. It would be difficult for Bella to play checkers in the dark. As I was watching Jasper I noticed him twitch slightly, and then a broad grin eased over his face.

"What?" But then I caught a scent carried on the edge of a breeze. I stopped in my tracks. "Is that?"

Jasper nodded in my direction, smirking. "Maybe I can just go back to Alice. Edward doesn't seem to need much help in the mood department."

"You're not going anywhere. I want you here when we find out that I won the bet." I crouched and aimed for the landing under Bella's window.

"Emmett, stop."

"No dude, I've got to see this."

"Seriously, let's call him from down here. You're just going to piss him off even more."

"Try to stop me then."

With that Jasper hit me from the side and we were on the ground, wrestling. It felt so good not to be wrestling for my life. Jasper and I playfully rolled around on the ground, before I pinned him beneath me.

"You're losing your chance here, Emmett. Edward's going to hear us. He'll be down before we can find out what's going on. And then you'll never know if you won."

"Anything to get me to let you up, huh?" But he was right. I leapt from Jasper to the landing under Bella's window in one silent bound. In all honesty, I wasn't really prepared for what I saw. Jasper was next to me in an instant, and I quickly pulled him away from the window.

"What the hell, Emmett?"

"Dude, Edward's going to be angry enough with me. The least I can do is keep you out of trouble too."

"No! Are you saying?"

"Well, I don't know exactly."

And then we both heard it.

"_Oh." _

It was Bella. Jasper and I tried to muffle our reaction, but Edward heard us.

"_Oh for the love of all that's holy."_

Jasper and I laughed louder. I silently mouthed to Jasper "_for the love of all that's holy?"_ and shrugged my shoulders. Where did he come up with that one?

Jasper looked like he might fall off the roof, he was silently laughing so hard.

I scratched my fingernails against the glass of Bella's window. "If you don't send Edward out, we're coming in after him." I thought back to my agreement with Edward about teasing Bella, and wondered if he'd hold this against me. I wasn't actually teasing about sex, just nudity. Who was I kidding? Edward would make me pay for that glance, with or without the stupid comment.

I quickly turned to jump down from the roof, but Edward caught me in mid-air, knocking the wind out of me. We landed to the ground with a loud thud. I saw lights go on in Chief Swan's bedroom window. Cursing under my breath, I bolted for the tree line with Edward. We watched the light in Charlie's bedroom go out and both breathed a sigh of relief. But then Bella's voice carried across the night air.

"You better not make him late."

Jasper was still up there. I grabbed Edward and wrestled him to the ground before he could jump back up and pounce on Jasper.

"Don't worry, Bella." Jasper chuckled. "We'll get him home in plenty of time."

"Jasper, what do vampires do for bachelor parties? You're not taking him to a strip club, are you?"

"Don't tell her anything!" I called, my arms pinning Edward beneath me. As soon as the words were out of my mouth I knew they were ridiculous. Jasper wouldn't tell Bella the real purpose of our hunting party. Edward took advantage of my momentary lapse in concentration. He managed to pick me up and toss me into the nearest hemock. Another enormous thud rang out. This time a neighbor's porch light went on.

Edward shook his head in my direction, chuckling, before focusing his ire on Jasper. He crouched, ready to jump, his hands extended.

"Relax," I heard Jasper say. Soothing waves of calm hit me like warm water in a tidal pool. Edward suddenly stood up from his crouch and calmly ambled over to the patch of yard just under Bella's window. Jasper saved himself.

"We Cullens have our own version. Just a few mountain lions, a couple of grizzly bears. Pretty much an ordinary night out." Jasper explained to Bella through the open window.

"Thanks Jasper," Bella called out to him as he jumped down to the ground.

"Hey Edward, what's up?" Jasper asked in a casual tone, smirking openly.

I jogged over to the two of them, ready to get between Jasper and Edward if necessary. But Edward was actually struggling to suppress a grin. "You both had better watch your backs, and your minds. If I catch either of you thinking about what you saw in there, you'll wish you stayed with Peter and Charlotte in The Yukon."

Uh oh. "_Peter and Charlotte, Peter and Charlotte, Peter and Charlotte_," I thought to myself in an attempt to focus my thoughts.

Edward looked between the two of us, a slightly suspicious look in his eyes. I wondered what Jasper had running through his mind. Suddenly, there were too many things to keep myself from thinking. I couldn't think about Bella's… "Ouch!" Edward's fist landed on my shoulder.

"What did I just get finished saying about Bella, Emmett?"

"_Peter and Charlotte, Peter and Charlotte, Peter and Charlotte."_

"Hey Edward, let's get out of here before we wake Chief Swan up," Jasper suggested.

"Good idea!" I chimed in. At least while running I could pay attention to what was around me, instead of Bella… "Ouch, damn it Edward. You've got to give me a minute."

* * *

**A/N: I broke this chapter up because I'm going on vacation and wanted to post something before I go. If you don't get an update in a week or so, don't worry, I'll be back with a post as soon as I can find Internet access!**

**Please review!! I love to hear from you all!! Happy August, Marie**


	26. Bachelor Hunting Party

We followed Alice's directions and ran off into the Olympic range. We'd have no problem finding food on our own, but with limited time her map was helpful. I kept sneaking glances at Edward as we ran, and I noticed Jasper doing the same. Alice was right; Edward had changed. He was quick to smile, his eyes were brighter somehow, he seemed lighter, and I think he was faster too. Jasper and I had to race to keep up.

Edward's mood was infectious. Of course, Jasper picked up on it easily and was giddier than I'd seen him in a month. I was just so excited to be out with my brothers on my own turf again; their happiness was an unexpected bonus.

With the first whiff of mountain lion, Edward was off. It wasn't a contest, and Jasper and I sat back to wait it out. For me it was a relief to let my mind wander unguarded. As soon as Edward's scent was out of range, Jasper turned to grin in my direction.

"Dude, Alice was right. Bella is a godsend. I haven't ever had this much fun hanging out with Edward."

"I know, man. He's totally different," I agreed.

"Yeah, he doesn't have the weight of the world on his shoulders."

"No guilt."

"No stick up his-"

"Hey, Jazz. Give him a break. He was a virgin for crying out loud. For a century."

"_Was_ a virgin? What did you see up there?"

"You can ask Edward yourself. But, let me put it this way, they seemed to know what they were doing. What I saw was no trial run. Anyway, how else would you explain the change?"

"I don't know. I just can't imagine Edward would take that chance with Bella, especially before the wedding. How could any vampire, without completely destroying the human? Or without turning them?"

"I don't know Jazz. How were you able to keep from drinking that human's blood? And how did you avoid Sakhmet?"

"I don't know."

A breeze blew in from the west and Jasper and I raised our faces to catch the scent of the wind. Edward was on his way back.

"I can't keep Edward out of my thoughts much longer, Jazz. We have to tell him."

"Whenever, man. It's been so easy to be around him, I'm ready to go, no problem. Just give me a signal and I'll do my thing."

Edward was definitely faster than when we'd left four weeks ago. He was back in less than a minute from the time we picked up his smell. I'd never seen anything like it. He playfully threw himself into the tree standing between Jasper and I. Its trunk broke with a crisp snap, and Jasper had to jump so that it wouldn't fall onto him.

"Easy there, big guy," I laughed as Edward settled between us.

Edward was beaming. "I know I didn't really need that, but it was amazing. I've been staying so close to Forks, all I've had has been deer for the past two weeks straight. Daily. Just to keep my hunger in check." Edward looked back and forth between Jasper and I. "Can you imagine? It was awful, not since the winter of '27 have I-"

"Dude, don't even start. You have no idea-"

Jasper cut me off with a withering look. Damn! I almost slipped.

"Please, don't even go there." Edward laughed. "There's nothing bad to eat in The Yukon. You must have been up to your eyeballs in moose." Edward stopped suddenly and looked between the two of us.

"_Peter and Charlotte? Peter and Charlotte?... Maria?_" I thought. Now was the time to talk, but I had a serious case of cold feet. Jasper raised his eyebrows in my direction, and I tried to inconspicuously shake my head. Jasper narrowed his eyes and gritted his teeth, but I wasn't going there. Not yet.

"Alright you two. Tell me. Tell me now," Edward demanded, growing more suspicious by the second.

"So what's up with you and Bella?" I asked, choosing the other topic I'd been trying to keep myself from thinking about in Edward's presence. I let my mind go on that subject and braced for a punch or a tackle. Instead, a broad smile took over Edward's face and his eyes sparkled. "And what's with your eyes?" I added.

"You did it, didn't you? It's the only explanation." Jasper was obviously relieved that I came up with something.

Edward smirked. "I don't know what you mean."

"Come on Edward, spill."

"You won't get a word out of me."

"Dude, I'm not looking for a word, I'm looking for details. Like you haven't been in all of our heads a million times. You owe us." Sure, Rose and I weren't subtle, but there was definitely a growing imbalance here.

Jasper jumped in. "Edward, if you guys did it, that's awesome and everything. But I'd really like to know how you managed. The first time is so much more intense than any other."

Edward raised his eyebrows. "It is?"

"So, is that a no?" I asked.

"No, not completely," Edward admitted with a hint of self-consciousness.

"Not completely? What's that supposed to mean, bro?"

"It means that the bet's still on," Jasper said, "and that we should definitely talk." Jasper turned to me. "Emmett, do you remember your first time with Rose?"

"Of course."

"You weren't here then Jasper. I think we all remember it," Edward joked.

"_Ha, ha, like I haven't heard that before,_" I thought sarcastically in Edward's direction.

Jasper continued, "And Emmett, it was…"

"Intense beyond words."

"Exactly." Jasper looked pleased with himself, like he'd proven a point or something.

"But dude, that's just us. I mean Edward and Bella? No offense Edward, but you just don't seem-"

"Emmett, it was not just you and Rose. I guess you don't know, because you've only been with Rose since changing. The first time you have sex is always significant, for vampires and humans. But it's much more intense for a vampire. And when you've found your mate, there's nothing else like it. There's a force, like an energy that's generated. It just blows you away. Then afterwards you're changed. That's why I assumed you and Bella already did. You're just so different, Edward."

Edward nodded his head. "I know what you mean about a force. Have you two been back in the house yet?"

Emmett and I shook our heads.

"Then you haven't seen my bed. I demolished the bed."

"Ha!" I doubled over laughing. Jasper was shocked. But I noticed that Edward looked shaken up.

"It will be more intense than that?"

I growled at Jasper. "You're just trying to win the bet here Jasper. Cut it out. Stop trying to scare him."

Jasper only shook his head at me before turning back to Edward. "If I understand you correctly, you tore an iron bed to pieces, but Bella walked away completely unharmed, and still human?"

Edward smiled his crooked smile and shrugged his shoulders. "Yeah."

"Dude, that's kind of amazing."

I could see the wheels turning in Edward's head. "So, is it specifically intercourse that you're talking about Jasper? Will it get more intense than it's already been? I mean, what exactly is sex?"

"OK, the bet's definitely on if Edward has to ask that," I teased.

"No Emmett, it's a good question. Sex isn't the same for us, since it's not about procreation. Maybe it is just physical intimacy."

"No Jasper, you and I know it's all about one thing. I mean the other stuff is fun and all, but sex is sex."

"I assume you spoke to Carlisle about this, Edward. What did he say?"

"It was more philosophical, nothing technical. He told me to ask Tanya about the details."

Jasper rolled his eyes. "Like you'd actually ask Tanya about sex with Bella."

"Why wouldn't you ask Tanya, Edward? You guys both have an_ interest _in humans."

Jasper gave Edward a knowing glance, but Edward only shook his head and looked away. "It's nothing," he half mumbled.

"What? Tanya and Edward? I didn't know. When? How did I miss that?"

"It was nothing like that, Emmett," Edward said as he stared down Jasper with menacing eyes.

"Tanya's just in love with him, that's all," Jasper said, ignoring Edward's look.

"Jasper, you know that's not entirely true."

"You're telling me I'm wrong about emotions. Please, I'm not."

"She was with Harlan for twenty years. She came to me on a rebound."

"Try she was trying to make you jealous for twenty years. Why do you think they didn't show up to help with the newborns?"

"It wasn't because of Irina?" I asked.

"Tanya is the head of that family. If the problem were Irena's, they would have simply left her at home."

Edward shook his head slowly, then let his head fall into his hands. "She's going to be there tomorrow."

"That's some funny stuff, man," I chuckled.

"Emmett, it's not funny, it's my wedding."

"All you need is to get Jacob there, and it will be perfect. Maybe you and Bella could fix the two of them up." Suddenly I was pinned against a boulder with hands around my throat. But almost as quickly, it was over. Edward let me up. Jasper's hand was on Edward's shoulder and I could see the anger rolling off of him in waves.

"Dude, what was that?"

"This is my wedding Emmett, it's not a joke," Edward growled. He flared his nostrils and shook his head at me, but then he slowly turned away and looked at the ground. "And, well, I invited the dog."

"What?" Jasper and I both asked in disbelief.

Edward cursed under his breath. "It was a stupid idea of mine back when Alice was sending out invitations."

"And is he actually coming?" Sometimes I just didn't get Edward.

"He's been gone for a month. No one's seen him. The tribe assumes he's phased for good."

"No reply then?"

Edward glared at me. "No."

Jasper cast a menacing look in my direction and I suddenly had no desire to speak at all. Then he turned to our brother and I saw the anger that had flared again die down.

"Edward, Alice has had nothing to do for four weeks except to worry about your wedding. You know Alice. If Tanya were going to be a problem, she would never have been invited. About the wolf, just leave that up to Emmett and I. If he gets within a mile of the house, he'll wish he never came back to Forks."

"Thanks, but no thanks, Jasper." There was resignation in Edward's voice.

"Edward, what are you talking about?"

"If he's man enough to show up, Bella will want to see him."

I shook my head, but words wouldn't come. Jasper filled the silence. "You're either a saint or a little crazy. But whatever you want, Edward. We can just make sure that he doesn't get out of line, make him disappear quickly and quietly if he does."

"Thanks, Jasper. I'd appreciate it." Edward smiled a weak smile. "I imagine you two would like to hunt as well. Perhaps we should get going; there's not much time. I should get back soon. There are a few things I-"

Jasper's cell phone rang at that moment, and Jasper had it to his ear.

"Alice."

"_You guys can't come back. Tell Edward no."_

Of course Jasper didn't have to tell Edward anything, we could both easily hear the conversation.

"Why?"

"_He wants to see Bella. No way. She needs sleep, and there's no way he's seeing her tomorrow before the wedding. Everything you guys need is at the bed and breakfast off one oh one. I told them you would be getting there at dawn."_

I couldn't tell what Edward was thinking, but I moved in a little closer in case he tried to bolt.

"Right, Alice. I know the place. I'll see you tomorrow then. You don't have any assignments for me tomorrow night, do you?"

"_Only a few dozen,"_ Alice giggled, "_in the bedroom."_

Jasper smiled. "Good. I'll uh, see you later then."

"_Oh, and Jasper_," Alice added in a louder voice than she had been using before.

"Yes, Alice?"

"_It's time to tell him_." There was an audible click as Alice hung up. Jasper shut the cell phone and spun to face us. I was taken completely off guard and froze.

"_But I'm not ready yet. What do we say? Damn Alice! I mean Peter and…"_

"Emmett, for god's sake, what are you keeping from me?" Edward growled.

"_I was thinking about Bella's…"_

"That's not it and you know it. And while you're at it I'd like to know what happened to you three while you were away. Why were you gone for close to a month? Why would you leave Alice like that, Jasper? She's been a mess."

Jasper looked like he'd been punched in the gut. Edward noticed immediately and backed down.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you Jasper. But this whole family has been keeping something from me."

I took a deep breath. Thanks to Alice, I knew exactly when I had to do this. I had to do it now.

"Edward." My voice was quiet as I nodded to Jasper. "Jasper and I thought it might be easier if you just listened to my thoughts." Edward's face turned remarkably calm as he looked between the two of us. Thank god for Jasper.

"Alright then. Let's hear it."

I took a deep breath and thought back to the beginning, when Jasper got a call from Alice on our hunting trip. I tried to remember every detail of Alice's vision and her plan.

"Oh my god." I heard Edward whisper.

I didn't stop thinking, though. I recalled all the details of our trip to Italy, meeting the guards in Volterra, our interview with Aro.

"He believed you?"

I took another deep breath and clenched my fists. Before continuing I thought, "_Please forgive me, Edward._"

"There's more?" Edward's eyes were wide with disbelief.

I couldn't look at him as I replayed the next part of the story. I ran through my attack on Valentino, the new bargain, and our decision to work for the Volturi in exchange for Bella's life.

"What have you done?" Edward looked horrified. "What are you saying? What in god's name happened to my family? To play with Bella's life this way…" Edward turned around and walked a couple of steps in the other direction.

"Jasper!" I hissed.

He looked at me and shook his head. "I'm doing all I can, Emmett. Get on with it. Quick."

"That's not the end of it Edward. Please, listen." He was turned away from us, but I picked up where I left off. In my mind I recounted the trip to Riyadh, meeting Sakhmet and her fighters, her feelings for Jasper, our trips into the desert to hunt and to learn to fight. I may have put a little more detail into the disgust that was ibex, and the knowledge that some female vampires preferred the company of women. I threw in the fact that dragons were real just for the fun of it.

Edward's breathing became audible and the air around him seemed to shake, so I knew I had to hurry up. Quickly, I thought through Jane's anger, our isolation, and then the fight. There were too many vampires, they ganged up on Jasper, Valentino tried to kill me, and I killed him instead. I got a little confused and started from the beginning of the fight again. Edward was shaking and clenching his fists. "Jasper, help me. The fight, I'm stuck on the fight."

Jasper's voice was calm. "Emmett was like a machine, and Rose was amazing. But the newborns all came at me in the end. Emmett was going to help me, but then Valentino attacked him from out of nowhere. Rose tried to help me, but there were too many and they were too strong. I wasn't going to make it, but then Sakhmet let her fighters come and help. Dragon fighters are no joke. With their help we killed them all. We did the job we were sent to do."

"Thanks, Jasper," I sighed. I continued out loud. "The council was there. They saw everything. Bella has-"

"Until the end of the year?" Edward finished for me. My thoughts must have been racing ahead of my mouth. "Bella has until the end of the year?"

"No, Edward. You two have as long as you want." I said, stepping in his direction.

"What?"

"Edward, I may have really screwed up in the beginning of all of this, but I fixed it. I mean, Rose and I both did. You and Bella have forever."

I tried to recall every detail of the scene with the council in the desert. I wanted to make sure that Edward was clear on that.

I continued walking towards Edward and he turned to face me. Edward's eyes were blazing; his whole body was tense and the air around him buzzed. His hands were clenched in fists. With only two feet between us, he could have easily killed me with a good hit. I fought the urge to retreat. And then, without warning the tension broke, like sun breaking over the horizon, and Edward threw himself at me. I stepped back, still frightened, but he was too fast. As his body collided with mine, he threw his arms around me. I was knocked backward, and my body tensed, ready to fight him off. Where was Jasper?

Edward let go of me and stepped back. His face was glowing; he was shaking his head and blinking his eyes. "Thank you." That was all he could say.

After a full minute he continued. "But, then it's you, and _Rose_? How could you promise that?"

"If you could have half the happiness I've had with Rose, how could I not? Anyway, Alice says we won't need that long. But if it's what you and Bella want, then you have all the time you need."

"No. We need to talk to the family. I need to talk to Bella. That's not good enough. I can't let you two do that. The future can change, Alice's visions change all the time. We need a plan."

"No!" I grabbed Edward by the shoulders.

"Edward, we were sworn to secrecy. Aro knows we can't keep this from you, in fact I think he likes that you'll know. He's aware that Alice must know what happened. But all bets are off if we talk about this with Carlisle, Esme and Bella."

"But Bella? Emmett how can I keep this from her?"

"Telling her will only put her life in jeopardy again."

"So we just wait and see what happens?"

"We made this right Edward. You're getting married tomorrow and Bella is safe, no matter what."

I looked over to Jasper for support, but he wasn't standing where I'd seen him last. I caught sight of him on a small rise about twenty yards off, staring at the morning sky, as it grew red with dawn. Edward looked at me for an explanation and I shook my head. But then we both seemed to figure it out at the same time and ran over to him. Jasper turned and looked hard at Edward. I was about to say something, when I realized that Jasper already was.

"Jasper, you have nothing to apologize for. I would never ask that of anyone," Edward replied to Jasper's silent words.

"I couldn't do it, Edward. I had to come back to Alice." Jasper's eyes were pleading for forgiveness. The wind picked up, bringing with it the scent of cedar, Sitka spruce and grizzly. Reflexively, each of our heads turned into the wind. But then Jasper turned away, as if he were considering running off in another direction. Again, I watched Edward listen to Jasper's silent words.

"Jasper, I have nothing to forgive you for. What you have done for Bella and I goes beyond anything I could ever expect from another member of my family. I never imagined a wedding gift like this one. To fight for Bella and I like you did is something I could never repay. And beyond that, to know that you all were instrumental in giving us this time together. This month has healed me, it's made me think better of myself, and it brought Bella and I closer than I thought we could be while she's still human." And with this the look on Edward's face grew into an unabashed smile.

"Edward, I know you want to extend Bella's human life. Don't let this get in the way. It's not a gift if you don't use it. Please know that you have all the time you want."

"Alice might be right, Emmett. I don't know if we'll need the time."

"Really? What about Dartmouth?"

"Something happened a few nights ago that I don't know if I can completely explain. I realized how fleeting this moment in time was for Bella and I. What we have is beautiful, but it's too precarious. We can't last forever as two separate creatures. And the longer we draw this out, the more unlikely it becomes. But it doesn't mean I don't cherish this time. It's even sweeter because of it."

"So when do you think?"

"Whenever she wants. As it stands, sometime before her birthday."

"And you're ok with that?"

"I've come to terms with it. I can't live without her."

There was no need to say anything in response. Everything was as it should be. The three of us watched the red dawn bleed into a pale shade of gray as the sun rose behind a thick veil of clouds. It was going to be the perfect day for a wedding.

Edward smiled in my direction. "So what are three vampires supposed to do all day at a bed and breakfast, anyway?"

"Two of those vampires still have to find something to eat," I reminded him.

"Well, then we can't go back yet. We can't have you two eating the guests. Except Mike Newton. He's fare game as far as I'm concerned."

And with a laugh, we ran off in the direction Alice told us to. We weren't going to bet against Alice this late in the game.

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**A/N: How did Edward break the bed? For anyone that missed it, the rest of Edward & Bella's last night together was published as an outtake called The Last Night. You can find it at: http://www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/s/5327038/1/**

**Don't be shy! Tell me what you think. All you have to do is tap that little green button. Thanks for reading! Marie**


	27. The End, The Beginning

It wasn't enough that I was getting married in fifteen hours and twenty-seven minutes. It wasn't enough that I was a vampire marrying a human, the love of my very long life. No, my brothers returned to Forks just in time to add to my list of items to obsess and worry over. My mind was reeling with each revelation that had been laid at my feet, enough that I felt the need to sit. Vampires never need to sit. So, I was grateful when Emmett reminded me that he and Jasper still needed to feed. I was more than eager to put these thoughts temporarily behind me and savor a run through the forest in search of prey.

Thanks to Alice's directions, Emmett found his grizzly in less than four minutes. There was no play, no mock battle this time. Emmett was all animal as he tore into the bear and locked his jaws around its neck, drinking before the creature's heart could stop. The bloody carcass was still twitching as Emmett threw it to the ground.

The site of it was infectious. The need to relieve my growing tension was all consuming. There were too many human feelings to worry about, to think through, and to be overwhelmed by. The hunt was right. My brothers and I were together again, a band of predators. We were off. Jasper, Emmett and I tore through the trees and soon found a herd of elk grazing next to a mountain lake. I sensed my brothers' thoughts change from human words to images and sensations. I let my mind follow.

Wordlessly, we surrounded the herd. Jasper took the lead, as his need to feed was paramount. The elk were trapped against the water's edge. They leapt for the lake, but Emmett and I were faster and pushed them back to shore. We brought seven down. Jasper's prize was the stag. He pinned the animal beneath him, his teeth fixed on its long neck, and his body shuddered with pleasure. Emmett and I each took our share, leaving three large does for Jasper.

Emmett began moving eastward, tracking another herd. But then our heads snapped up in unison at the sound of a small tinny ringing. We were still as stone, our eyes and ears searching for a sign of other predators, or more prey. The sound came again; it came from Jasper's direction. Emmett circled in, looking for the enemy among us. I held my ground, crouching and ready to spring.

Finally, the civilized world came crashing in, I snapped out of it first.

"Jasper, it's your cell phone."

Jasper's head snapped in my direction, then he stood. "Huh? Oh, right." The phone was at his ear.

"_Jasper? What are you doing? I said to be there at dawn. I knew you'd be late, but it's almost eight. Get over there now."_

Emmett and I each stood up and hung our heads somewhat sheepishly.

"But Alice, what are we going to do at a bed and breakfast? Let us play, we'll get to the wedding on time. I think we all need this."

"_I would think you'd trust that I know what's best by now. But if you want to play, Jasper, fine. Play with your brothers. But then you won't get any playtime with me tonight."_

Alice hung up the phone.

Jasper looked at us plaintively. "I haven't been with her in a month. Edward, you're going back to town if I have to knock you down and drag you there."

"That won't be necessary, Jasper. I'll go willingly. I wouldn't want to pit anyone against Alice, especially someone that shares her bed.

I wasn't eager to return to hide out at the bed and breakfast as Alice had planned. I couldn't imagine why she thought that the best place for me was to be cooped up in an upscale boardinghouse. I knew she wanted to keep the preparations at home a surprise for Bella and I. It was her gift to us. And while it felt strange not to be more involved in the most significant day of my life, I knew it wasn't the flowers or the linens or the seating arrangements that were important to me. All I wanted was Bella. I wanted the world to know that she was mine.

And beyond the surprise, I knew that I couldn't stay apart from Bella if we were in the same house. I would have fought off my whole family in front of the arriving guests just to see her. Ten miles and two brothers was a more secure barrier, although not an impenetrable one. So I understood why I needed to stay away, but as the ornate Victorian house came into view, I had my doubts about Alice's choice of venue.

We saw Emmett's jeep parked along side the road so that we could drive back to the house. It wouldn't do to have the groom and his brothers running up the drive to the wedding. The bed and breakfast was just as I imagined it would be. There was floral wallpaper and pastoral pictures decorating the walls, lace curtains hung on every window, and the house was permeated by the smell of baked human foods.

A soft woman with rounded edges and gray hair met us at the door. I noticed the tremor in her voice as she spoke, and she carefully to keep her distance and avoided our eyes. "You must be the three gentlemen that reserved my house for the day. Here are the keys. I'll be back this evening, like I arranged with Alice." She placed the keys on her desk instead of handing them to us. "Oh, and which one of you is Edward?" I looked up at her and nodded. Her eyes darted back down to the desk. "Yes, well I have a letter for you from your sister." She placed the letter next to the keys.

"There's a tailor waiting for you two in the second floor bedroom. Edward, your room is the second on the right, just down this hall." With that she grabbed her bag and her glasses and walked quickly out the front door, not bothering to look back.

Emmett smiled, "We've still got it, huh?"

"Yes, we can make old women run for their car. Quite the vampire accomplishment, Emmett," Jasper joked, rolling his eyes.

"I'm just saying-" Emmett continued as they walked toward the stairs.

"Edward, come up to our room when you're done with Alice's letter, or whatever it is she has for you to do."

I nodded absently as I opened the envelope in my hand. I was already reading as I opened the door to my room.

_Edward,_

_1. Bathe. There's some blood under your thumbnails._

_2. Don't do anything to your hair. Bella likes it a little messy._

_3. Don't put your tux on until later. I don't want to see any creases. I brought you something to hang around in. It's in the closet_

_4. After your bath, I have something to help pass your time. When you're done washing, check the drawer in the nightstand._

_Love, Alice_

I checked the closet, and my bathrobe was hanging there. I pulled it to my nose and inhaled. It still smelled like Bella. "_Thank you, Alice."_ I drew a bath and settled into the deep whirlpool tub. Since there was no one else in the house besides my brothers and a tailor, there was no buzz of thoughts to distract me from myself. I took a deep breath and tried to relax. Impossible. Thoughts ran through my head of their own volition.

"_Bella has until the end of the year?"_

"_You and Bella have forever."_

"_But, then it's you, and Rose? How could you promise that?"_

In my wildest dreams, I couldn't have imagined that this was what my family had been keeping from me. I thought back to the night this all began. My mind had been completely consumed by the idea of having sex with Bella. I knew Alice was off the wall with angst, and I let her convince me that she was trying to keep me out of her thoughts about the wedding, and that she was trying to avoid intimate thoughts about Bella and I. How naive and self-centered could I be?

There had been no real peace, no real reprieve this past month. My siblings had engineered it. I had been blissfully ignorant of all of the pain that they had endured for Bella and I. And now Emmett and Rose had given their own freedom so that I could keep Bella. The question I'd asked Emmett had gone unanswered.

"_So we just wait and see what happens?"_

No, that was unacceptable. The one person I desperately wanted to discuss this with was the person that would be most in danger if she were told. And she certainly didn't need any more incentive to change.

_Bella has until the end of the year…_

Bella wanted to change before her birthday, well before the year's end. But what if she decided she wanted that freshman year at Northwestern, like I'd encouraged? I could never stand in her way. But I couldn't let Emmett and Rose make that sacrifice for her.

I thought back to my old impulses when it came to Bella. I always made decisions for us, for her. I thought I knew what was best. I did it without telling her and forced it upon her. How had that changed? When did it change? Now, I couldn't make a decision without her. I had no idea what I should do now, and I felt like I never would until I could consult with her.

I tried to again to relax, but it wouldn't come. I submerged myself completely in the tub and attempted to let the water's weightlessness take over. It didn't work. I was up and out of there as soon as I could get the blood out from under my fingernails.

I wrapped myself in my bathrobe, enveloping myself in Bella's scent. My mind wandered back to the night that she wore this. That night had been life changing. Bella and I had learned so much about one another; we'd bared our bodies and our souls to each other. And Jasper's words came at me to shatter my most precious memories.

_And when you've found your mate, there's nothing else like it. There's a force, like an energy that's generated. It just blows you away. Then afterwards you're changed_.

I suddenly felt stupid and naïve. Sex with Bella would be more intense than anything I'd experienced so far. Where just ten hours ago I had felt so sure that I could do this, now I felt like I was back to square one. I was being selfish by simply considering the act. No one knew if I could really keep Bella safe. Not Jasper, not Carlisle, not Tanya.

_Tanya's just in love with him, that's all._

I never let myself believe that Tanya was in love with me, and suddenly I felt like I'd lied to Bella about the whole affair. 'Affair' was the wrong word; there was no affair.

Alice was clearly insane, isolating me here with just my thoughts for company. I turned to go find my brothers, and on my way to the door I kicked the nightstand in aggravation. But I was a ball of nerves and used far too much force. The small table smacked against the far wall and shattered, collapsing in on itself.

Inside the mass of splintered wood I spotted a long white box tied in a red ribbon. It must have been Alice's suggestion to pass the time. As I pulled the box out from the debris, I spotted an envelope taped to the top with my name written there in Bella's writing. I brought the envelope to my nose and took a deep breath. This was written recently. I inhaled again before carefully unfolding the delicate stationary.

_Edward,_

_When I started this project, it wasn't for our wedding; it wasn't even for you. I started this for myself. I began when I decided that in order to be with you forever, I would become a vampire. I didn't tell you about this, because I knew that it would only make you angry._

_I began right after the prom. You mentioned one day that your human memories had faded over time. I knew that what we had was too important for me to ever forget. _

_So I started writing my own story from the time my life really started, when I moved to Forks. I wrote down everything I could remember; the first time I saw you and your brothers and sisters, that first day in biology when you wanted to kill me, that first afternoon in the meadow, our first kiss. I wanted to remember exactly how I felt. And I just kept writing. _

_There's some missing stuff. There were three months where I didn't write a thing, and looking back I really couldn't remember what I'd done. But those months didn't matter to me because you weren't there._

_Anyway, at some point I realized that I was writing this to you. I know that never being able to read my thoughts has been really hard for you. I think it's also made you doubt some of the things I say, and the feeling I have for you. So, this became a project for us. I know you'll always remember this human time in my life, but you would never know what was going through my head during it. _

_So, here it is, for you. It's just me Edward, and everything I've thought about you from the beginning. As a wedding gift I'm giving you myself. It's what I've given from the beginning. I've always been yours._

_I love you. I can't wait to see you today. I'll be the one at the altar saying, "Yes, I do, I take this man forever."_

_With all my heart,_

_Bella_

I opened the box to find four large binders. I opened the first and began reading. Bella's voice leapt off the page. I read quickly, devouring every word. The first time my name was mentioned, my heart leapt into my throat. I had to read that part over twice before quickly continuing. My breathing came faster as our story continued and I was awash in nervous energy. I paced the room reading. The binder ended with the prom, with Bella determined to become one of us.

What she had given me was priceless. It was our story, so intimately told. She held nothing back, all the love, the pain, her determination, fearlessness and bravery. It had been hard to read. She loved me from the beginning, when I was too caught up in myself, in my own insecurities. She tolerated me when I condescendingly thought I knew better. I had been distant and cold; I imposed rules, restrictions. But Bella loved me nonetheless.

I went to open the next binder, but paused. Suddenly I realized that all of the noise in my head had stopped. I couldn't hear anyone else's thoughts, and I'd regained some of my mind's former clarity. One thought rang true: Bella's love for me had never wavered. Her one constant, her one guide had been her love. I couldn't falter now either. I would do the same for her, and let my love for her guide me.

The next binder was darker, and I suffered through our separation all over again. I read every word, but rushed through those months apart out of guilt and self-loathing. My breath hitched in my throat as Bella wrote about saving me. That she would want me alive after all I had done to her, that she would still want me in her life, it was astounding. I would never doubt the human heart again.

The last binder was my favorite. I read through it twice, I read through my proposal four times. For in this volume I began to see how Bella's love had changed me. I got up and looked in the mirror, really looked. I had spent so much time in the past month wishing that my constant vampire body could change, but I'd been ignoring the truth before myself. I had changed. I would never be the same. It was Bella that had been the constant in our story.

The unyielding force of Bella's love had toppled my convictions and found a way to my heart. The shared power of our love for one another would surely do much more. It would provide me with the grace to deal with both Tanya and Jacob at the wedding. It would bestow on me the calm and the peace of mind to work with Bella toward my part of our bargain. And somehow, I had to believe that it would save Emmett and Rose's life. I didn't know how, but faith was also one of the gifts that Bella's love had bequeathed to me. That would have to do for now.

My mind snapped back to the present, and I realized I was still in front of the mirror, with a big, silly smile on my face. Today was the culmination of my life, my love. Today my life would begin anew, with Bella by my side.

I sat back down on the bed and opened the last binder with an intense anticipation. The first page was blank except for the phrase, "To be continued…" I leafed through it desperately, unable to believe that it had ended. I was about to close the binder and start over from the beginning, when a small note card fell to the floor.

_Edward,_

_I know you're a fast reader. If you've already finished, I thought you might like to write down your version of our story. There was so much you kept from me at first. I'd love to know what was going through your mind. I know you remember perfectly,_

_XOXO, Bella_

I wanted desperately to reciprocate. I found a pen and started writing, pouring out my heart on the page. I was as brutally honest as she had been. I wrote about how I hated her at first, and how I was drawn back in. I wrote about the night I snuck into her room like a criminal, and how I fell in love with her. I wrote it all. I was just getting to my favorite part of that first spring we spent together, our afternoon in the meadow, when there was a knock at the door.

"Edward." It was Jasper.

I glanced at the clock; it was time. The day had evaporated, and now it was time to marry Bella, with a clear head and an overflowing heart. I put the pen down. I would have to finish this later. It would wait. Bella and I had forever.

**-To Be Continued –**

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**By popular demand, you can find the sequel to Prelude at: http://www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/s/5467729/1/ (Just replace the (dot)'s with .'s) **

**xxx, m**

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